GUILT SEASON II (MAIN TENU SAMJHAVAN KI) CH-39

Here is the last chapter:

Chapter 38

After getting discharged from the hospital Ragini was trying to get her normal self back. But it wasn’t easy to live in a world which is completely new to you. Every time people tried to remind her about her forgotten past she used fall more in the pit of darkness where she was helpless.

Helpless that she cannot return the feelings to anyone may it was of her Bhayyu and mother’s love or Yohan Kavya’s friendship. Not even the love Ansh showered on her. But she felt a strange longing to remember her past but she failed every time.

So getting back to the old Ragini seemed terribly impossible task. Watching the disappointed faces around was still difficult and she did not knew whether ever she will be out of this misery. Always sad about not able to remember anything Ragini had become lifeless almost in six months.

“Ehem” she heard someone clearing their throat when she was watching the moon outside. A tear which was at the edge of her eye fell and she immediately wiped it off before turning. “Sahil?” she looked at him confused. In these six months if the person she will least expect of speaking to her then it was Sahil.

Though she knew his name and the fact that he is Ansh’s father and Kumud – Vikram’s deceased sister’s husband, she didn’t know anything about him. And he never tried to remind her anything so she assumed that he wasn’t any close to her in her past also.

“Um. Actually Vikram said he is going on an assignment to Goa and he told me to look after you for two days” said he and she just nodded her head and turned back to the window as there was nothing that she had shared with him till date and she believed they know each other just formally.

“Can I?” he asked permission and Ragini nodded her head and he sat on the chair. “So what’s happening?” asked he and she looked at him confused. “You are okay right?” he asked and she smiled at him. He gave her a tight formal smile. “By the way your eye brows are grown. Why don’t you try trimming them” he said and she just gave him a confused smile.

“I thought you are feeling sad so just wanted to cheer” he smiled sheepishly. “Actually don’t bother” Ragini said waving her hand in air.

“No actually all say I’m very bad at consoling someone. I don’t know how your Kumud dee really survived me. You know when she was about to give birth to Ansh Doctors called me inside so that I can console her. I walked in and I saw her screaming with pain. No I’m not a heartless person I…” he stopped remembering his wife’s face.

Ragini placed her hand on his shoulder. “I was scared that I will lose her. But she was strong. I was just crying crying seeing her but she consoled me. Like seriously I should have consoled her but instead she was consoling me” he smiled through his tears.

“I’m bad at consoling really” said he looking at Ragini. “See now also I thought of consoling you instead you are consoling me” Ragini chuckled hearing him.

“You are sweet” said Ragini. “You know you used to call me Karela” he chuckled and Ragini’s face turned sad.

She sat without answering for sometime and he sat beside her  and she buried her head in his shoulder. “I… I don’t remember anything. Nothing. Why?” she asked painfully.

“See there” Sahil pointed at the moon and Ragini looked at still her head placing on his shoulder.

“What’s that?” asked he. “Moon” she said. “A full moon perhaps” he said and she was not understanding what was he trying to say.

“Today is the last day it will be complete” he smiled. “From tomorrow it’s journey will start to deplete. And then one day it will be completely gone. The next day only there will be a new moon. Isn’t it?” she nodded her head and he brought her face to face him.

“Similarly this is your dark night when there is no moon. You feel you are in darkness and  lost. But tomorrow your new moon will come. Are you ready to start this new journey again?” asked he and she looked at him unsure.

“We are not supercomputers to remember everything Ragini. Some day we will eventually forget one or the other person when they go far away. And when they remind us we feel sorry that we forgot them. Then does that mean we are bad?” she nodded her head.

“Think this same. You have forgotten them but you know them. So build new memories with them. Be the new you. Eventually you will get back your normal self once you start accepting people and get along with them like nothing has happened. You will get back the Ragini in you. May she forget everything but she will not forget her nature. She will not forget to love people. She will not forget to make friends. She will not forget to bring the brightness in everyone’s life” he said and a tear escaped his eye.

She hugged him and he rubbed her shoulder. “And she will not forget to be the sarcasm queen” she chuckled hearing him. “I miss your sarcasm. Please get back to your shoes soon” said he and smiled.

***.****
“Bhayyu” Ragini welcomed screeching Vikram who was back after his assignment. He was surprised finding her like this. Sahil smiled at him from the dining table. “I missed you like hell” Ragini hugged him pouting and Vikram had those happy tears in his eyes.

“Ragu…” “Come on have a bath. You smell rotten tomatoes” said she dragging him to his room. Vikram held her hand and cupped her face. She gave him ‘What?’ look. He kissed her hair and she smiled widely. “Thank you” he whispered. “For what?” asked she. “For giving my bacha” said he and Ragini hugged him and he smiled rocking her.

Ragini started being the normal Ragini she was and met every stranger who claimed to know her and apologized that she couldn’t remember them but she will surely build unforgettable memories with them. She completed her medical education staying in Mumbai with the help of Sriti who shifted to the Mumbai branch and Laksh helped her to complete the exam as he was the chairman of the hospital chain.

Later she worked under Yohan who was a pediatrician too. Ansh got the love he missed all these years of a mother and Sahil was all happy looking after everyone.

***.***

“Sahil something is wrong with Ani. She doesn’t have food after the operation” Adarsh complained. “Don’t worry Adi Bhai I will talk to Yohan. He will check her. Tomorrow take Ani to Yohan’s clinic” said Sahil and Adarsh agreed.

The next day Adarsh went to Yohan’s clinic with Ani and Pari was holding her second daughter. “Dr. Yohan” he asked the receptionist and she guided him to a room where they sat waiting for Yohan.

“Damn Ragu. You are bad as a pediatrician. Which doctor offers chocolate to the patient?” asked Yohan annoyed walking inside his cabin not aware of Adarsh and Parinita’s presence.

“I do. Chocolate is healthy chimpanzee. How will you understand you did not complete your degree right?” asked she and then they both turned to find Adarsh with his family.

“Adi Bhai” Yohan walked and hugged Adarsh. “Hi Yohan” said he and reciprocated the hug. “Pari Bhabi” he hugged Pari who also reciprocated the hug smiling.

Ragini stood there watching them. “Ragini this is Annapurna Badi maa’s elder son. Annapurna Badi maa is mom’s elder sister” said he and Ragini smiled at them.

Pari closed her fist remembering how Sanskar has to leave them all. Adarsh held her hand and she cooled down. “Actually Sahil Bhai told me about Ani. Heyya Ani” Yohan forwarded his hands and Ani dangled her hands around his neck and clutched to him.

“Ragu take her to the examination room. I will be there” said he handing Ani to her. She smiled and took Ani to examination room.

“She still doesn’t remember anything?” asked Adarsh and Yohan nodded his head in no. “Will it matter in any case. Our Sanky is gone far from us. Now she gets her memory back or not I don’t care” Pari said looking at Adarsh.

“Pari” he said making her sit. “Is there any fault of her Jaan?” asked he and she wiped the tear escaping her eye. “My Sanky loved her Adi” she said painfully. “And what’s her fault in that?” asked Adarsh.

“You won’t feel her pain Pari. She doesn’t even know the name she has is her own. She doesn’t even know the people surrounding her are related to her or not” said Adarsh consoling her.

“I know you miss Sanky and consider her responsible for him going away. Don’t you trust your Sanky? If he has gone away to stay away from her then he has reasons for it. And that reason is he loves her immensely. He doesn’t want her to suffer a guilt that she is not able to return him the feelings. If he stayed here loving her she would have died hundred times that she is not able to love him back. And I don’t think our Sanky would have wanted this to happen” he said and Pari placed her head on his shoulder.

“Now if she falls in love with him and I know it will surely happen he can’t escape it” said Yohan smiling and Pari nodded her head.

“How is little princess? Thought any name?” asked Yohan looking at the small baby. “She keeps crying as the wound is still fresh. And we were always sure Sanky will be here when she will be born and like Ani he will only name his second princess also but sadly he did not stay. So we have to think of a name yet” said Adarsh.

“Ananya” said Yohan. “Sanky bhai wanted to name her Ananya. He had told me” said Yohan smiling through his tears. Adarsh smiled at him.

In the examination room Ani was sitting quite. “Hey Princess” Ragini rubbed her cheek. “What happened? Why aren’t you having food?” asked she bending to Ani’s height. She stayed quite. “You wont tell me?” Ragini forwarded a chocolate which she grabbed.

“Nobody loves me” she had tears in her small eyes. “Aww why do you think so?”asked Ragini. “After the new baby came all are busy looking after her. I came out of the big” she stretched her hands signing big. “Big operation but all are busy with her. I should have been like earlier with the pipe at least chachu was there but now he is also not there” said she sadly.

“Pipe?” asked Ragini confused. “She was diagnosed with Leukemia. And that baby only could save her” said Yohan walking in. Ragini looked at Ani emotionally.

“Hey Princess” she cupped Ani’s face. “Mumma loves you the most. See she brought a new baby to save you bacha. And she is your sister. And for you only she had to undergo an operation at this small age. So mumma and everyone are worried for her” said she and Ani looked at her blinking her eyes.

“Baby is in pain?” asked Ani and Ragini nodded her head. She ran to Pari. She neared the baby which was feeling uncomfortable due to pain. “I’m sorry Gudiya. I’m very bad.” she hugged the baby. Adarsh and Pari were surprised. They had seen Ani hugging the baby first time.

“Mumma I promise I will have food on time and I will not hate baby” Ani looked at Pari who hugged her and kissed her forehead. “I know she needs you more now. I will not get angry on her” said she and Pari smiled through her tears.

“Thank you Yohan. I did not knew this was bothering Ani” said Pari. “All the credits go to Ragini she spoke to Ani and cleared the misunderstanding” said Yohan and Pari looked at Ragini who was smiling at her.

“She is different Bhabi. Different than everyone. And trust me you cannot hate her” Pari smiled remembering Sanskar’s words from the past.
“Thank you” said Pari smiling and Ragini nodded her head acknowledging.

“Can I” she forwarded her hand to take the baby and Pari forwarded the baby and Ragini took her in her arms. “You will be fine little princess” said Ragini and the baby smiled. “Awww she is cute” said Ragini and she kept playing with the baby.

Pari remembered how she met Ragini for the first time and how she held her. A smile crept on her face remembering Sanskar and Ragini’s silly fight that day and Sanskar’s confession that he loved Ragini.

Adarsh smiled remembering her long explanation to Sanskar and her calling Ani cute that night.

“She doesn’t talk like earlier thank god” Adarsh whispered in Yohan’s ears. “You must be kidding” said Yohan with wide eyes. “She talks more and now instead of Sanky bro Sahil bhai is bakra for those talks” said he and chuckled and Adarsh laughed.

Ragini had become part of this small world of Raheja’s through Sahil and Ansh. Ansh was her heart beat. She loved him like his mother would do.

Once when Ansh was suffering with typhoid Ragini stayed beside him and treated him well. She used to sleep beside him and take care of him. One night when he was shivering badly due to fear Sahil tried a lot to console him but he could not.

Ragini had gone home to get the luggage as she wanted to stay near Ansh for more time. Sahil rushed to Asthana home to get Ragini.

“Sahil?” Sumi was surprised to find Sahil at that time of night. “Maa where is Ragini?” asked he worried. “She just slept beta. She told na she will come tomorrow” said Sumi. “Oh” he said sad. “What happened Mr. Volcano why are you bursting today?” Ragini whose sleep was disturbed walked out yawning.

“Ragini Ansh is not well. He is shivering a lot” said Sahil holding Ragini by her shoulders. “What?  And you are wasting your time here Mr, Punctual?” asked she and rushed out with him.

“Ansh.. Ansh” Ragini held his hand. He was not in his senses. “Maa… maa…” he was crying badly. “Ansh baby. Maa is here only” said Ragini kissing his forehead. “Maa” he opened his eyes to find Ragini looking at him emotionally.

“Ragini aunty” he said. “No aunty. Your maa” said she kissing his burning head. “Maa” said Ansh hugging her and she caressed his hair and wiped the tear which escaped her eye.

Sahil looked at her thankfully and Ragini nodded her head smiling.

“May whatever happens I’m your maa and nothing can change this truth” said she caressing Ansh’s hair.

Like this Ragini was a mother to Ansh though she did not marry Sahil.

She was again the old Ragini but something she missed and she had no idea what it was or who he was. Not even a blur image.

***.***

“You still don’t want to return Sanskar?” asked Sahil over the phone. “I have to finish this project Sahil. And still I don’t want to come there” said Sanskar.

“And anyways you are sending me Ragini’s videos daily so I can live” he smiled. “And I don’t know when I will run out of patience to handle her antics” said Sahil and Sanskar chuckled.

“For you fun Sanky you know she tries something new everyday and who becomes the bakra of it. Me” said he annoyed. “Because you are her Karela Sadu Sahil right? You got to tolerate her” said Sanskar wiping the tear at the edge of his eye.

“Okay Sahil. I have a meeting to attend. Bye” said Sanskar disconnecting the call.

“This Mandh Budhi tho will not budge like this. I have to do something, I can’t tolerate that Dumbo” said he. “You called me?” Ragini asked peeping at the terrace door.

“How do you end up hearing your names correctly?” asked Sahil. “He he. Because I have working ears not like yours fixed ears” said she.

And they continued arguing over silliest things in the world.

Sometimes two people can never get along.

Like water and oil.

Like America and Russia.

Like Ragini and Sahil.

*****.*****

So how was the chapter from the past.

I will include more in future chapters of it is required.

So excited for RagSan meet. Sorry got to wait till Sunday for that can’t help it.