HATE ? REALLY (A RagSan Fanfiction) Chapter 28

It was the new day and Ragini woke up and looked around. Though it took her a bit time to get that sleep she felt weirdly comfortable on the bed.

She yawned and walked to the washroom to get herself freshened up. After walking out of the room she looked around for Sanskar. But he wasn’t there.

She moved to the dining table to have some water. Her stomach made a churning sound indicating her hunger. She jerked hearing a sound.

Sanskar walked with a tray. He was wearing the apron. Giving her a big smile he placed the tray and signed her to sit.

She stared at him blankly for a second. “What are you staring at? My handsome muscles?” he asked her and she blinked her eyes and closed her half open mouth.

She sat on the chair and he served her the break fast and served himself sitting beside her. She had the first bite and looked at him with appreciation. It was really delicious.

“This is so good” she smiled at him. “Who do you think has cooked it? Mr. Sanskar Maheshwari. Obviously it will be not just good but best” he raised his collar.

“Don’t you think you praise yourself too much?” asked she narrowing her eyes.

“Because nobody is worth my praise” he said with a smirk. “Except for one” he said placing the first bite in his mouth.

“You” he said and she looked up to meet his eyes. “You know your Mahanta at exceptionally wrong times had earned you this reward” he said and Ragini rolled her eyes.



“Oh don’t roll your eyes you have to look again in these eyes” he said and Ragini stopped eating and looked at him.

“What is suddenly wrong with you?” asked she with wide open eyes.

“Um. Something you will know soon” he smiled coyly and she just stared him. “Now first thing first have your food” he signed her towards the plate and she continued with her eating.

After the breakfast was finished Ragini was ready to leave. Sanskar looked at her when he walked out of the kitchen after cleaning the dishes.

“Where do you think you are going?” he raised his one eye brow. “People call it home if you have forgotten” she said shrugging her shoulders.

“What’s the hurry?” asked he. She looked at him confused. “Can’t you spend a bit more time of your life with me?” he looked at her hopefully.

And that line had the magic to stop her  heart beat. She felt a new feeling in Sanskar’s eyes.

“Um” her lips formed thin line and looked at him blinking her eyes. “Okay. So what about the work?” asked she. “I’m the boss” he raised his collar.

“And I am not” she spread her arms. “Don’t worry. I will make you one” he smiled.

“Definitely either you have lost your mind or you have hit your head somewhere” her face was depicting her confusion.

Meri dhadkano me Bass Teri sadaa

“I prefer the first option” he walked to her. And suddenly that smile on his lips and the increasing closeness affected her. She looked around not able to move his intense gaze.

He smiled looking at her nervousness. He reached near her and her heart beat was very loud now as loud as he could even hear it. She just wished he did not hear it.

She felt his touch on her wrist and looked up. He walked and she had no option but follow him. He walked to the balcony where he had arranged a seating using some cushions and mat. He sat and signed Ragini to sit beside him.

She was surely not in a situation to react. He held her wrist and dragged her and she sat stumbling. She was about to touch his chest but stopped herself and looked at him not able to move her eyes.

He sat there gazing the white sky and Ragini was confused what was he doing. Finally she gathered all the courage.

“What are we doing?” she bent her head to meet his gaze. He looked at her smiling.

“I am enjoying my silence with you. And you are like always spoiling the moment” he nodded his head and she just stared him being more confused.

“Who likes silence?” she gave him a confused look. “I do” he said and looked back at the sky. She was annoyed now with his behavior.

“I like every second of my life” he looked at her. “When you are around” his word now raised her heart beat.

“Though it means silence, though it means I am rotting in hell. I can’t help but be happy that you are beside me” he was making her to feel a kind of electricity run though her body.

Suddenly he made the things worst and held her hand and caressed the top of it.

She got her senses back for a second but then again he made her numb when he kissed it looking into her eyes. She moved her eyes finally grasping things.

She drew her hand away from him.

She stood up to walk. “Ragini” his voice again raised her heart beat. She stopped her steps.  “I want to show you something” he came in front of her and handed a paper. It was a picture. Their picture together.



“You know this is my favorite picture” he said and she looked at him again. “Because here” he stood beside her and pointed at the picture.

“You are with me” he looked intensely in her eyes and her heart just dropped to the pit of her stomach.

“And I want this not just in picture but in real life too. Will you make my life as beautiful as this picture?” he knelt in front of her with a rose in his hand.

Her emotions were just not letting her to even breath. She hyperventilated and looked at him without blinking her eyes.

“I could just get this one” he said folding his lower lip. She still did not blink her eyes.

She was overwhelmed. Not for the fact that she was finally having someone in her life who loved her but also because Sanskar was the one who had those feelings for her. She wanted to collapse on the ground and break. But she was not able to do so.

“When I first met you nobody was interested in knowing who I was or what bothered me except you. Then when I forgot every pain and grief of my life just by staying around I never realized how my mission from revenge turned to protect you. Protect you from everything and everyone. I just wanted to see the smile on your face. Those tears of yours just burned my soul with the unbearable pain. I was confused. So much that I questioned myself do I really know what love it? Do I really know what is happening in my life? I never knew this new turn will bring so much to my life. I still don’t know. What I know really is that I love you and I can’t be away from you” those simple yet special words were what she had been craving to hear.

She never felt this kind of longing for anyone. None.

She was lost. She did not wanted him to stop or the time to move.

She stared at the photo and reminisced the old times and closed her eyes and let that lone tear to drop and trace her cheek.

She moved her hand towards the rose and Sanskar’s heart jumped with the excitement. He was waiting for her hand to touch that red flower and accept his love.

When her hand was just an inch away that solitaire in her ring twinkled and blurred her vision. Her moving hands felt the sensation sent by her brain and her hand stopped dead just touching the petal which was weak and fell on the ground.

That was the fate of their love. She looked at the petal. If she accepted this then everything will just slip out of her hands. Her Dadi’s happiness. Rudr’s expectations which were nurtured by her acceptance to the marriage proposal.

What and she could crush in that single second. One side it was her family’s happiness, Rudr’s expectations. On the other side it was Sanskar who was hopelessly in love for the second time. And her rejection might cost something very precious to her. It might cost her his happiness.

She dragged her hands back shivering. “No” she whispered and Sanskar looked at her confused. “No” she looked at him now controlling her tears.

“What?” he stood up and that rose dropped on the ground. “I’m leaving” she turned and wiped her tears. He stepped on the rose which had the most painful death. Yes it did not expected this life after sensing Sanskar’s excitement while he held it for the first time and thought about Ragini. It sure did not expected to be crushed this way.

She did not answer and was about to take the step when she felt a dangerously strong hold on her shoulder. Before she could react she was dragged back by Sanskar who made her to face her.

She scanned everything but his eyes.

He dragged her near to his chest and she placed her hands over it and looked up. Now his eyes were turning painful.

She did not wanted to see him like this. Never in many births.

She felt weak and her heart felt sinking each time those eyelids of his moved to control his emotional break down.

She left out a hot breath. “Leave me Sanskar” she said gathering her mind finally. “You just can’t get away alright? You got to answer me.” She rolled her eyes hearing him.

Forcefully jerking his hand she moved a bit away as his closeness only made her more mad.

“I don’t owe you an answer” she squeezed her eyes to hide her pain. The pain which was killing her with each second.

Why can’t she have a less painful death than this.

He held both her shoulders and dragged her and she again landed on his chest. “You sure me an answer” his eyes had the blend of pain and anger.

She moved her eye lids meeting his eyes. “I don’t love you” she almost whispered weakly and her life felt meaningless.

She released herself from his hold and he stood processing his thoughts. He quickly moved to her this time cupping her face.

“I know Ragini you are not accepting my proposal due to your engagement. But I will talk to everyone trust me” “I don’t love you Sanskar” she screamed this time and his hands dropped.

“I don’t” she looked into his eyes with tears fighting to drop. She was suffocating in a situation where she was surrounded by people she loved. Irony of her life.

All loved her but their decisions made her suffer. First her Dadi and now Sanskar.

And she was struggling to get out of this mess but the clutches were too strong.

She faced her back to him and walked with that painful tears which did not took long to drop.

Tum mile the ki mili thi manzil.

He dropped on the ground as he could not hold the weight of his emotions.

He looked at her while she kept walking.

Do Pal Ki thi yeh dilon ki daastan

Aur Phir Chal diye hum kaha tum Kaha.

As she reached the door she stopped. “Okay then” she turned hearing his voice. A cold lifeless voice.

She turned and found him at the balcony. “I don’t have a reason now” he smiled at bitterly and she narrowed her eyebrows trying to understand what was he saying.

“For what?” she asked and his smile just widened and eyes turned more painful. “To live” his voice choked.

Her breath hitched when he stood on the chair and was dangerously near to the railing of the balcony. Her eyes were ready to pop out when she realized what was he trying to do.

“No” she nodded her head and ran towards him leaving all the clutches behind.

“Sanskar” she screamed and held his hand. She dragged him down and crashed herself in his embrace. She dragged him as near as possible and tightened her hold.

“H…how can you even think of anything like this?” she asked sobbing. She felt dead just a second ago and now she felt someone had breathed a new life in her soul.

“How could you?” she asked again. Sanskar covered in his embrace now.

“I love you idiot. I love you. Only thing is I could not tell you” she dragged herself a bit away and met his eyes.

Tenu itna mai pyar kara ek pal vich sau baar kara
Tu jave jo mujhke chad ke maut ka intezar karaa.

He held her near to himself as he did not wanted to let her go. “You are the one who pushed me away and now you don’t want me to go away. Why are you doing this to me?” she looked at him painfully.

“I’m sorry” he whispered. She moved away from him this time. “I can’t do this. I can’t” she cried bitterly.

“I can’t break this” she showed her engagement ring. “I cannot” she back walked looking at him.

“No” she said and ran from there not facing him and he stood there blank. How can life turn like this. Just a second ago he had everything and now he had nothing.

Nothing at all.

****.****

I dont know whether I could justify your expectations.

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