GUILT SEASON II (MAIN TENU SAMJHAVAN KI) CH-12

“Jaan you are so funny” Sanskar’s mind was still playing Yohan’s words. Again and again he was imagining Yohan’s hand which traveled on Ragini’s shoulder while pulling her along. Yohan is his life and he should be happy that he is thinking of settling down.

Sanskar and Yohan had grown up more like one soul. There was nothing which Yohan hid from Sanskar. And now suddenly when such a thing has come in light he felt somewhere he is also responsible for it. When Yohan was going through so many changes in life he was so engrossed in his own grief that he failed to notice the expression changes which were the result of the elder’s decisions to bring Kavya and Sanskar together.

And now that gap arose which made it difficult to decipher did Yohan really meant what he said. Sanskar tossed in his sleep thinking over the words which left Yohan’s mouth. The words which had pierced him for no reason and he was trying to understand why was it happening.

He hadn’t been so restless in years. He hasn’t felt his heart from years and suddenly it is feeling all the dead emotions. And reason he don’t know.

On the couch Kavya sat in deep thoughts. Suddenly her memory was playing each second she spent with Yohan. Was it normal that you feel this way when your best friend is committed. Yohan committed- the thought stirred her heart only if she knew the reason for it. She was feeling pain from the time she had seen Ragini and Yohan so close to each other and now after hearing what Yohan which more looked like a confession she had her heart sinking due to fear. A fear which looked like Yohan was going away from her and she is trying hard to hold him but is failing every time.

A wall apart Yohan was continuously hearing the blabbering of Ragini who was so furious because of Yohan’s act. “You don’t want to tell that’s fine. But why am I being pushed in this?” she walked to the other side. He folded his hand to apologize. He knew he did very wrong by dragging her in this but at some corner he felt it was also her who was responsible for the mess.

“I’m really sorry. I know I shouldn’t have done it. But it wasn’t completely my mistake. You are equally responsible or more like you are the soul reason it happened” she fumed hearing him. “Like what do you think of yourself? I mean such ungrateful idiot you are. One way I thought your brother might help you to get your love and you are saying it was a fault” she spread her hands in annoyance.

“Why will he help me when Kavya is engaged to him only” he said finally not able to control his annoyance. “What?” she almost jumped off her feet. “And you bak bak ki dukan. You never put a full stop to you blabbering. And I had no other choice than this. I hope Bhai isn’t feeling it unusual” he scratched his head.

She was sitting with a confusion in her mind that how should she react to this. ‘Did he say that Kavya is engaged to Sanskar’ her mind was battling the thoughts which flooded as the time passed. “Are you serious?” escaped her mouth as she was still grasping the things.

“No I thought let me play a prank like you and Sanskar Bhai have found your new love and I being a cupid is trying to get you both using jealousy” he shook his head. Her heart fluttered with joy as she imagined what Yohan just said. ‘What the hell am I doing’ she put a full stop to her imagination.

“Oh” her mind was not in a state to put out more words than this. She lied on her bed silently. Yohan looked at her and found it weird that she did not argue more. It was not so her. Then he consoled himself thinking that she is weird at weird times and this must be the sedatives which are working so late.

He relaxed on the arm chair beside the bed as she was coping with her flooding thoughts. Thoughts which were more like the memory of the most beautiful time of her life just moments ago. Her time with Sanskar when he smiled how her heart skipped a beat and his expressions which were visible for the first time on his cold face. She hadn’t scene this side of Sanskar.

The Sanskar who was life. Who could do anything to make her smile. Then her memory traveled back further and the moment when he held her by her shoulder and their eyes met just before the accident. She saw that kind of emotion first time in her life.

It spoke thousand words. ‘don’t leave me’ she felt this is what all those words spoke. Why was she even thinking that way. He is committed and is happily committed one. Then why she thinks he will have any of those feelings for her. A complete stranger in terms of time.

We should dream which can be fulfilled’ she tried brushing her thoughts. ‘And dreams are not scripted’ her heart voiced out which scared her for the very first time.

No that’s wrong. Kavi is happy in this and I should not develop anything in my heart which will break the others heart. I should not’ she closed her eyes and after a lot of struggle finally sleep covered her.

The day ahead was about to bring something. Only if any of them knew.

***.***

Ragini brought the five star chocolate away from her mouth after taking the small bite while her eyes stopped at the door and she hurriedly gulped the small piece which she did not even enjoy much. She hated doing it but there was no other way as Vikram crossed his arms giving her a serious stare.

She could not help but smile sheepishly at her brother who was the most dangerous person when it came to her health. He narrowed his eyes making her more nervous and she hid the chocolate still looking at him carefully not dragging his attention to her hands.

But she had always underestimated the smartness of her brother. He walked to her and she again gave him smile and tried looking cute but it did not soften his stare. He moved to the pillow still locking his eyes with his sister’s and in next moment the chocolate she was hiding was in his hand and a question in his eyes as he raised his one eye brow.

“Bhai wo…” she formed words. “Arrey you are back” she closed her eyes when she heard Yohan who was walking with a smile as still Vikram’s back was facing him. ‘Yeh tho gaya’ she softly mumbled under her breath. Vikram turned with the stiff face which confused Yohan.

“I trusted you with my sister” his whisper was scary enough to make Yohan gulp in as the chocolate in Vikram was now clearly visible to him. He understood what he has landed himself in. “I…” “Bhai..” Ragini’s voice made Vikram close his eyes and fume at the same time it made Yohan to sigh.

Vikram turned to her with a serious look. “It was all my fault. He told me that you will scold. But you know na when I’m depressed I have that craving to eat chocolate. I tried but…” she was interrupted by Vikram who swiftly sat in front of her cupping her face.

“Depression? Why? Why suddenly?” his eyes sparkled with the tear. She looked at him with a smile which assured him that his little life is okay now. “I was feeling but now I’m okay my bhayyu is with me na” she snaked her hands across his stomach and he held her head.

Yohan finally smiled looking at them. “Are you sure? You are fine?” Vikram stroked her hair. His concern was like the oxygen while suffocating. She smiled more widely nodding her head.
“Change yourself. We are leaving” said Vikram kissing her head. She grabbed the bag in his hand and happily walked to the washroom. Yohan just wondered how can the same person have two completely different personalities at a time.

He remembered her vulnerable condition just the previous day and now look at her. She is even so chirpy when she knows she is in a hospital which for reasons is so depressive. She is behaving like she has come for a picnic. The Ragini he saw who was crying and struggling when Sanskar’s life was in danger was completely different.

“Yohan chachu” his thoughts broke as he heard the chirpy voice of his nephew. As he turned Ansh who was at the door found Vikram whose face was clearly visible to him. “Vikky Mamu?” his smile widened and Vikram’s smile faded.

“Maamu” Ansh hugged Vikram’s legs. Vikram moved up his eyes to Yohan who had the expected question in his eyes. “Ansh” Vikram picked him and avoided looking at Yohan. “Ansh…” they heard Ragini screech which made Vikram relax as he knew she saved him in a nick of time.

“Aunty” Ansh got out of Vikram’s hold and hugged Ragini who was kneeling down. She smiled holding him in her arms and he felt the motherly love he always craved for. He never could understand why Ragini’s hug reminded him of someone whose memories were as fragile as a thread. It more looked like a dream than reality. He doesn’t know why she gave him that warmth which he don’t even remember was present in his life years ago.

“Champ here you are” Sahil entered the ward and Ansh dragged himself away from Ragini and looked at his dad who was all smiles today. A smile he hardly remember he had seen on his dad’s face. He remembered the time when just the mention of his beloved Sanskar chachu used to make him furious and today he only made Ansh ready not waiting for the servants so that they can meet Sanskar in hospital.

He picked Ansh in his arms and turned to Vikram. “Thank you so much Vikky. If you weren’t there my Sanky wouldn’t have survived. Thank you so much” he gave a wide grin. Vikram felt his anger growing but he controlled it finding Ragini who was still smiling looking at Ansh. He just shook his head with a faint smile. Yohan wondered how Vikram is still calm hearing Sanskar’s name which boiled him like the volcano just the day before. The day was so mysterious he couldn’t help but just get confused more and more due to whatever was happening.

“Chale” Sahil smiled as he placed his hand on Ansh’s chest who nodded his head excitedly. They walked out and Vikram felt Yohan’s gaze and to avoid further discussion he spoke “Ragu bacha chale?” She mover her gaze from Ansh to Vikram and nodded her head. Yohan helped them through the discharge process.

Ragini played with her fingers pouting as she sat on the chair waiting for Yohan and Vikram who were busy at the reception collecting her reports and paying the fees. She looked around reading every alphabet present and every picture admiring as they took hell lot of time to come. She stood and thought of looking around. She walked to a ward where she found Kavya helping Sanskar to sit. She fed him the food and kept the tablets on the side table and walked to the wash room to get her hands washed.

Sanskar stretched his hands to reach for the tablets. He was about to loose his balance when he was held by someone. He looked up to find Ragini who was holding him firmly and trying to put him back in his place. For a moment her closeness made his heart flutter.

Yeah Sanskar Rawat can feel his heart too. He in years heard the loud beats of his heart which was racing to pace up with the time. Her face was so near to his face that he could feel the closeness of her flawless skin which made his breathing uneven.

Time felt dead. His eyes did not blink and stared her more and more and just more. He wanted to touch that milky skin. His face moved more closer to her to inhale the fragrance more and more and the spit in his throat felt dry suddenly and he hacked for breath. As his eyes skin scanned each cells of her skin which was so near to him he did not realize that he was gawking at her shamelessly.

She supported his heavy body and moved him back to the bed and he cursed the time which ended so fast. He wished it to be dead for forever. “Phew” her lips let out a breath relaxing and his heart again raced looking at her pink moving lips and flapping eye lashes slowly.

“Couldn’t you wait till Kavi come? I know your hands are very long but hello I just call you Dumbledore don’t think that you are one and have a magic wand…” she continuously blabbered half of which did fall on his ear drums but did not reach his mind. She made her eyes big and then shrank as her expressions changed. Her pink lips were moving non stop.

He smiled as her talks were not stopping and his mind was numb admiring her cuteness. She looked more cute as her nose flared up. When she waved her hand in front of him then only his mind started recording the voices around.

“You are mad” she signed him moving her index finger on her side head. He was still in trance to understand anything. “You are here?” Yohan’s voice made her turn and Sanskar’s mind played back all the happenings of last night. “You are so funny Jaan” his mind replayed Yohan’s words and the smile on his face faded.

“What are you doing here? You brother is waiting there” Yohan dragged her with him and Kavya who walked out of the washroom found Ragini’s hand in Yohan’s hand which pained her. She just stared in the direction they walked.

Ragini who released her hand from Yohan’s grip snaked her hand across his neck and made him bend to her height. A tear tried escaping her eye but she held it back. But a tear tripped out and burned Sanskar’s cheek who wiped it as hard as he could squeeze his skin.

On the other side of the corridor Dr. Sriti stopped when she heard a voice. It was her. It was really her voice. She was frozen in her place as she heard the voice again. She looked up to find none. Was she imagining things. May be the years passed without her had made her vulnerable so much to every voice seems like hers.

She was just recollecting herself when she dashed into someone and the files in her hands fell on the ground. “Oh I’m sorry” Vikram bent and picked up the papers. She tucked her hair strand behind her ears and grabbed the papers he handed her.

Vikram felt bad that she did accepted his apology as she did not respond. Only if he knew that she was in her own thoughts. As she grabbed a paper her hands slightly touched his hand and both instantly looked up and their eyes met for the very first time.

With that only he handed her a paper which could have brought a tornado in their already smoothly running life.
The time wished he had seen the paper. His hands felt something and at a place a finger moved like it felt the touch of someone.

He felt strange as the paper slipped out of his hand and reached Sriti’s hand.

Did he just miss something. Something which he should not have missed. Why he felt that lost connection when his hand traveled on the print over it.

“Bhayyu” he felt he heard her voice and his heart beat stopped at the very moment. Sriti walked away leaving him in his thoughts. “Bhayyu” Ragini held his hand and he left a breath he was holding. “Come” she dragged him.

Sriti who turned found him being dragged by someone. She doesn’t know why she felt a connection towards her. She turned her head again and Ragini looked back as if feeling her gaze. She found a lady doctor whose back was just visible. For a surprise she felt the same connection.

***.***

Hello guys
Hope you people liked the chappy. Sorry for being late.

Sally ?