Avneil OS: Bulleya (avni’s POV)

You don’t know how happy I was when Neil had finally worn something that was not blue, black or white. It was really annoying! Thank gods cvs decided to bring more colours in his life and made him when yellow and pink coloured shirts.

This is from Avni’s POV. Hope you like it. I’m not at all sorry for using the word allah a hundred times. Some scenes might be altered, credits to my ‘long lasting’ memory.
Also, anyone remember that Neil had said in the jewellery shop (long back ago) that ‘iss puri dookaan me mujeh koi aur ladki dikhayi nahi deh rahi?’ Tillu saahab, Aapke aakhe to Avni par hi hai toh aap kisi aur ladki par thodi der ke liye nazar bhi kese lagoange. Aapki toh Avni madam par hi chipak gayi hai!

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Meri rooh ka parinda pharpharaye
lekin sukoon ka jazeera mil na paaye
ve ki karaan..
ve ki karaan..

The first time she had looked into those brown orbs of his, she had misunderstood of what he was trying to do and immediately warned him and tried to hit him which had led to an argument between them. She felt that they shared a connection, a relationship she could not categorize, or put a name to it. She did not even bother because she would never ever see his face (only to stare at the features on it from time to time afterwards). The man was saying that he had saved her life, which had irritated her to no end. What did the guy think himself of? Some hero from a movie? Probably, because she had never seen such an egoistic man like him before (only to discover that he had a heart large enough to keep even the aliens from other planets in it.)

He had asked her to describe how the person who saved her looked like. She had remembered every feature of his face, even to the microscopic small lines that appeared when he was thinking hard, so she had easily answered.

The police had come out of nowhere at night in the forest. She had first panicked at the thought that the police had found out about who she was and looked like a deer in headlights. She recovered quickly and walked away, subconsciously taking in the smell of sweat and mild lemon fragrance from Neil’s shirt.

Ik baar ko tajalli to dikha de
jhoothi sahi magar tasalli to dila de
ve ki karaan..
ve ki karaan..

What was the problem with this guy? Wherever she would go, Neil would poke his nose into her own personal business and when she would ask him why, he would say that it is his job as a police officer. The guy irritated her to no end (she did not realize that she quite enjoyed herself when she bickered with him.)

When he had made her wear that beautiful diamond encrusted pink ring, she had fallen deep into those billi jaisi aankhe and had not been able to break the eye contact. His fingers had lingered on hers before they realized that they had been staring at each other, which had been on the fine line between awkwardness and comfortable. Awkward because the stare game had last for minutes, more than any normal people would have had. Comfortable because they found a sense of familiarity in the other’s windows of their soul, their eyes. Avni strangely felt like Neil was like a man made from her two moms; the intelligence and a welcoming aura of Neela ma and the innocence and an open-mindedness like her late mother Ayesha.

Raanjhan de yaar bulleya
sun le pukaar bulleya
tu hi to yaar bulleya
murshid mera, murshid mera
tera mukaam kamle
sarhad ke paar bulleya
parvardigar bulleya
haafiz tera, murshid mera

Neil had entered her life like a storm, proving her every belief wrong. This time also, he proved her wrong. There he was, standing—defending Rhea, protecting her and going against his own family because he had kept a promise to marry. She had thought that every man was like her father, the great film producer Ashish Mehta, who were cowered and who never stood up for their loved ones. Neil was the man who she had dreamed of meeting as a child. She wished that there were more men like him. Alas, she would have to stay happy with only one human being like the one from the fairy tales. She thanked Allah for showing her such a beautiful person in her dark, broken life, who brought some rays of hope for her to see that the world wasn’t exactly as how she had perceived it to be. And her Heart silently thanked him for making it feel once again, for finally bringing a person in her life who melted the ice from her heart with his love that had spread all around like wild yet tamed fire.

Main kabul se lipti titli ki tarah muhajir hoon
ek pal ko Thehroon, pal mein ud jaaun
vey main taan hoon pagdandi labhdi ae jo raah jannat di
tu mure jahaan main saath mur jaaun

(A/N: I would just like to tell that me watching naamkarann was on and off before the mehendi rasam. So this part might not accurate.)

She had been insulted in front of his family for what? For screaming for help to save her and accidently falling into Neil’s arms? The Society was just the way she had thought they were in her childhood. However, Neil wasn’t. He ran out of Mehta house and asked if she was okay and also gave her his blazer. How many clothes was the guy going to give to her? She feared that she might one day have all his clothes in her room (well, it did happen, in their room).

She still accepted it because for reasons unknown to her, but not to Allah. He knew that Avni wanted to spend every second of her life afterwards beside—no, not just beside, but beside him with his hand in her hers, which silently promised that he would always be there for her.

That was not the only thing he had done that day, he had come to Ali’s café searching for her, to ask for her forgiveness for his family’s insults. She forgave him because she knew with her whole heart that he was a genuinely good person. They had a cookie date, yes you heard that right. She knew that he was unique, that he would always be by her side, whatever the situation, like a true friend.

Tere kaaravan mein shaamil hona chahoon
kamiyaan taraash ke main qaabil hona chahoon
vey ki karaan..
vey ki karaan..

He had confessed that he didn’t love Rhea. He had said that he trusted her. She had never been so happy in her life to hear someone not loving their to-be-life-partner (at that time she didn’t know that she would become his bride, his soulmate). Then he had held her hands, she felt electricity course through her veins. She would have withdrawn her hands to not get more of the electric shock, but she didn’t because she was enjoying the feeling of the unbelievable warmth she was getting from Neil’s hands holding hers. She had felt a little complete, after such a long time.

Why am I so happy? Have I fallen in love with him? Then her second thought crossed her mind. No, that’s not possible. I’m just happy that Neil would finally break his marriage with Rhea. No! not that because he would become single, it would be because Dayawanti won’t her hands on The Khanna family’s money. The tiny voice of her subconscious said, yeah right, keep telling that to yourself.

Raanjhan de yaar bulleya
sun le pukaar bulleya
tu hi to yaar bulleya
murshid mera, murshid mera
tera mukaam kamle
sarhad ke paar bulleya
parvardigaar bulleya
haafiz tera, murshid mera

She could never forget the morning after their first night, even if she had forgotten their suhagraat. How could she? Neil had teased her about it, saying things like ‘me bilkul nahi jaanta tha ki tumhari jaisi ladki ki itni romantic side hogi’ or ‘Me apne aap ko datta rahta tha ki me iss marriage me abhi tak kyu tha, par kal raat ke baad, tum soch nahi sakti mujeh kitna relief mila.’

This had broken her. Was she going to suffer the same fate as her mother? With these thoughts her walls broke down and she forgot who was watching her and didn’t care if he judged her. She just kept on crying and crying until Neil clarified that nothing had happened between them, that he would never do such things to her without her permission. He proved her again that not every man was like her father.

Jis din se aashna se do ajnabi hue hain
tanhaiyon ke lamhe sab multavi hue hain
kyun aaj main mohabbat phir ek baar karna chaahoon
haan…

Neil proved for the umpteenth time that he was seriously husband goals. Yes, he had forced her to read her father Ashish’s—the one she hated with all her heart—letter he had written for her—his Rockstar. He had forced her to take out all her anger on him, to release all her locked-up feelings in her shattered heart. And she did. Surprisingly, he had been there for her, not leaving her alone to drown herself in her tears and been her shoulder to cry on.

Then he had asked her if they could be friends. Avni was ecstatic hearing him say this, only with a hint of disappointment. Disappointment because she wanted to be more than friends. But she didn’t deserve his friendship, than how could she deserve his love?

Ye dil to Dhoonrhta hai inkaar ke bahaane
lekin ye jism koi paabandiyaan na maane
mil ke tujhe bagaawat
khud se hi yaar karna chaahoon

What did Neil think, huh? That he would hold hands with that best friend cop Mithali of his and she wouldn’t notice. She was frustrated to no end and had vented out all her anger, showcasing her jealously to Neil in the process.

What did he think, he would keep on praising Mithali on and on and Avni would just listen to him? Didn’t Neil realize that Avni was falling for him hard and he was hurting her feelings when he talked about some other girl? Probably not, he was so busy in his own world that he could not even pay an ounce of attention to what Avni felt.
Avni finally covered herself with the blankets and mentally fumed as memories of Mithali and Neil touching each other crossed her mind.

Mujh mein agan hai baaki aazma le
le kar rahi hoon khud ko main tere hawaale
ve raanjhna…
ve raanjhna…

‘So, Neil had just come to solve his case?’ Avni fumed with anger. She had done Sholay’s suicide drama scene to convince him to come with her on honeymoon. Wasn’t that enough? She had risked her self-respect and acted drunk and acted like a four year old crying for candy. Oh allah, that had been humiliating. She had thought that she would get some kind of reward for being so courageous. And she did.

She finally got some well earned romance with Neil in the pool, lost in the eyes; lost in their world. The dupatta that was around her; which was bringing her close to Neil, making their chest brush together, showed how much unintentionally Neil was possessive of her. She wondered why her heart had start doing karate moves she had never been able to do before. She was afraid that Neil might hear the sound of her Heart’s invisible legs kicking against her chest to free itself from its prison.

Raanjhan de yaar bulleya
sunle pukaar bulleya
tu hi to yaar bulleya
murshid mera, murshid mera
tera mukaam kamle
sarhad ke paar bulleya
parvardigar bulleya
haafiz tera, murshid mera

Murshid mera, murshid mera…

Yes, she had fainted in Neil’s arms from high fever, but only for a while. She had wanted to know what Neil would do, what limits he would cross to keep her warm, to keep her from dying. She was enjoying his concern for her, him touching her to only keep her alive. She wondered how much he would touch her to keep her warm (she didn’t have to think much, as it happened soon afterwards)

First he had kept a wet towel on her forehead. That had frustrated her. She had wanted to say, really? This is the best you can do? Thankfully, her shivering had saved her and her mind could only think of cold, colder and freezing cold.
His actions replied to her thoughts. She soon felt someone embracing her, holding her close to his bare upper-half, which was radiating body heat. She heard him say that he will let nothing happen to her. She controlled her crimson-red blush that was threating to spread all over her face and the stupid smile which was very difficult to stop from appearing on her face.

‘Pyaar mein hai janoon, par dosti mein hai sakoon.’

Even if she was getting married to Ali, her heart will always and forever belong to Neil. Her heart will always have a place—no, a Ruler’s throne at the centre of her heart for him, she loved him even more than herself.
However, she could not let this ‘temporary’ love (that’s what she thought) get in his way of getting a happy life. She hadn’t asked if he loved her or not, and she probably never will because she knew his answer would be ‘No’. After all, he had been the one to hook her up with Ali. That had broken her every hope of him ever loving her the way she wanted him to.

She was afraid that if she confessed her love to Neil, he would go away, breaking the glass-like fragile relationship they shared.
Also, Neil just thought her as a friend. His ignorance of her silent cries for him to hear what her heart wanted to say, that her heart wanted him, not Ali, was enough proof that he didn’t love her. It would be better if she faced the music and moved on from him.
Ali loves me, he surely will always be there for me.

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Sorry if you didn’t like the song choice. Actually I had decided to take songs from Ae dil hai mushkil only and I couldn’t take Channa mereya because that’s in the third part for Ali—sh*t! I said a spoiler. Eh, I am going to update it tomorrow or day after tomorrow anyways.