Bas judaa naa hoo
Os
By shivra
Shivani sara
Heyyyy guyssss its shivra here ahem ahem aka Shivani the writer of MAN CHALA TERI ORRE and sara the writer of it all started with lust we are here with our first work #Bas_Judaa_Naa_Hoo os on 6 month’s separation track of swasan sooo with out wasting time we should start our story but beware dont beat us after reading this????okkk but your juta chappals are most welcome for us???chalo chalo no moree bak bakk story padooo…..
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This story starts from when Laksh was back to home and Swara,Sanskar,Ragini,Laksh were all set to start afresh, only the main symbol of marriage that is the vermilion which every married women puts on her maang, had taken place. Their happy family had been captured in a photo, but seems like there was something fishy even in this happy occasion….. And maybe that was something, which no happy moments could cure. What is it?
(Sanskar’s Bedroom)
Swara flung the door slightly and got in seeing Sanskar sitting on his bed, his back facing her. She looked at him confused as whenever a small noise of the door opening travelled into his ears he would always look and acknowledge Swara and be happy. But today, he didnt even saw her coming and she could also sense he was not wholeheartedly happy even during the time when he was putting vermillion on her maang at morning…. She could sense he was upset, no no upset was just a mere word. His pale and sad face at that moment expressed that he was depressed for something.
She sighed looking at him and started taking slow steps walking towards him. She put her hand on his shoulder. Sanskar looked up at Swara, but what Swara saw right now shocked her to the core!!!!!
He was not only sad, she could also see a trail of tears coming down from his eyes!!!! She immediately cupped his face.
Swara (worried) : Sanskarr!!!??? What happened?? Kya hua tumhe!!?? Why are u crying??
She also got teary eyed on seeing such a condition of Sanskar.
Sanskar looked at her and immediately wiped his tears and got up. He looked at her and cupped her face. Swara knew her Sanskar was going through the tough time and pangs of guilt surrounding him for leaving her all alone, after what had happened in these 6 months. Even she was going through the same guilt for laying a finger on him for being responsible for Laksh’s disappearance 6 months back. But she promised she would repent and never ever hurt her love ever again….
Sanskar : I.. Swara..
He couldnt speak as he immediately fell on Swara’s shoulder shocking her. He held her tightly as if he was hugging his life. Swara held him back. Both remained like that for sometime, it was high time both would share a moment together crying and regretting for all those things they had said to each other out of anger.
A lot had happened in these days…..
After sometime both broke the hug. Swara gripped his shoulder.
Swara : Sanskar, plz plz dont cry
Sanskar : I dont know Swara!! The thought of even getting separated from you kills me to death!! Still how can I dare to not understand ur feelings that day and how could I easily throw you out of my house!! And…not only that, everytime I taunted you and that day, that day I throwed you down and didnt bother to pick u up, i just still cant believe so much happened and we both are still together!! And…
Swara : Sshhh!!
She put her hand on his mouth making him quiet.
Swara (wet voice) : Plz Sanskar dont ever blame yourself for the mistake I committed!! It wad entirely my fault that day!!! That day I blamed u for Laksh’s disappearance…How can I blame u like that… I curse and hate myself for all those things I said to u!!
Sanskar (removes her hand) : No… I hate myself for giving u so much pain!! I wont be able to forgive myself Swara!!
He wiped her tears still looking at her eyes intensely. Both were deliberately dying for each other, and all they needed at this time was each other!!
Swara : I’m sorry Sanskar!!!
She held her ears. Sanskar immediately jerked iff her hands and took them together towards himself and kissed them shutting his eyes tightly. A small emotional smile appeared on Swara’s face and she looked at him.
Sanskar : Its not you who should apologize, its me…. I am sorry Swara!! I am very sorry….
Swara : Pagal!! (Slapped his cheek playfully yet emotions were present on her face) Yaad nahi tumhe hamara rule?
Sanskar (smiled) : Yaad hai….
SwaSan (together) : Dosti mein orr pyaar mein no sorry and no thank you!!
Swara : Lets forget our past Sanskar and move on!! Plz…
Sanskar smiled lightly and nodded. Swara left the room for filling the jug with water. Sanskar changed his expression, no he had given her alot of pain and maybe it was too hard to get over them so soon… He would need time to come out of their past.
He, he just couldnt believe he gave this much pain to Swara!! Tears again made way through his eyes…..
This was too serious….
After their emotional talk Both swara sanskaar were staring at each other with lost of love desire passion what not Without breaking the eyelock
Swara cups sanskaar’s face with lot’s of love and she kissed his forehead..and the hugged each other….! San:chalo swara let’s sleep its late(he said breaking theit hug) Sanskaar starts to go when swara holds his hand
San:kyaaa
Swa:i need u(saying this she hugs him tightly
San:but…..
Swa:No if no but’s i just want u to make love with me(she closed her nd hugs him more tightly sanskaar hugs her back)
(swara continues)
Please sanskaar in these 6 month’s i never got a peaceful sleep please sanskaar make me yours mark me as yours again please i need you…
San:im sorry(he closed his eyes nd kissed her forehead)
Swa:dont be
San:ill love u I’ll make u mine again ur only mine i love u Swara..
Saying this he locked her lips with hers and kissed her sweetly yet passionately..
Feeling his lips on hers after 6 months.. she closed her and reciprocated softly..
Tears welled up in her eyes remembering how she accused him..
Hey Humnava mujhe apna bana le
Sookhi padi dil ki iss zameen ko bhiga de
hmm.. hoon akela, zara haath badha de
Sookhi padi dil ki iss zameen ko bhiga de
Soon Sanskaar broked the kiss and sees her tears. He wiped her tears and kissed her forehead.. his lips lingering on her forehead more than necessary making her feel like the most blessed woman in the whole world.
He kissed her eyes drinking the remaining tears from her eyes..
Continuing he further kissed both her cheeks sensuously making her blush..
He kissed her chin and teased her by placing wet kisses near her lips..
Soon he dugged his face in her neck giving innumerable wet kisses followed by bites on her neck..
He sucked the bitten area after listening to her moan which was maddening him..
Both were on fire after long 6 months of separation making them to get lost into each other more immensely and passionately..
Kab se main dar dar phir raha
Musaafir dil ko panaah de
Tu awaargi ko meri aaj thehra de
Ho sake toh thoda pyaar jataa de
Sookhi padi iss dil ki zameen ko bhiga de
Soon he unpinned her saree and blouse making her damn shy..
She turned herself in bed and now her back was facing him..
He smiled seeing her shyness and sensuously travelled his hands on her bare back making her shiver at the proximity.
His hand soon reached her b*a and he unclipped the b*a..
He kissed her whole back and turned her towards him..
He could see her red heated cheeks and his teasing was maddening her even more..
Murjhaayi si shaakh pe dil ki
Phool khilte hain kyun
Baat gulon ki zikr mehak ka
Acha lagta hai kyun
Un rango se tune milaaya
Jinse kabhi main mill na paaya
He removed the b*a from front.. it easily came out as it was already unclipped..
He eye raped her making her burn under his strong yet sensuous gaze..
He trailed wet kisses on her neck followed by color bone and beauty bone and then back to her neck while she moaned feeling his touch after 6 months. Damn 6 months !! Worst part of their life which kept two body away from each other even after being 1 soul..
Dil karta hai tera shukriya
Phir se bahaare tu laa de
Dil ka soona banjar mehka de
Sukhi padi dil ki is zameen ko bhiga de
hmm.. hoon akela, zara haath badha de
Sookhi padi dil ki iss zameen ko bhiga de
He kissed her upper body.
Waise toh mausam guzre hain
Zindagi mein kayi
Par ab naa jaane kyun mujhe wo
Lag rahe hain haseen
He moved to kiss stomach and placed his tongue inside her belly button making her moan.. he placed feathery kisses on her stomach giving her ticklish sensation making her giggle..
Soon he moved down and kissed her feet slowly and placed soft kisses from her feet to her thigh..
He kissed her inner thighs and incircled there making her moan feeling extreme pleasure..
Tere aane par jaana maine
Kahin na kahin zinda hoon main
Jeene lagaa hoon main ab ye fizaayein
Chehre ko chhooti hawaayein
She rolled on him angrily and undressed him fully..
She angrily kissed and bitted on her chest making him groan..
Soon she become tired taking it as a chance he again rolled on her and removed her lacy inner..
He came above and whispered in her ears – ‘ ready love? ‘ he whispered licking her earlobe..
She just nodded not able to take the pleasure..
After taking her approval, they consummated.. she moaned in utmost pleasure..
Stars become the witness of uniting of two souls yet again..
Inki tarah do kadam toh badha le
Sookhi padi dil ki iss zameen ko bhiga de
O.. hoon akela, zara haath badha de
Sookhi padi dil ki iss zameen ko bhiga de
(soon they drifts into sleep due to tiredness having a broad satisfying smile on their face)
(Next day)
Whole maheshwari family is having their dinner all ladies are serving them but swara’s eye’s was searching for her love her sanskaar…
Swa:(in mind)why dint sanskaar came till now (while serving)he said he’ll be back by 7:45 but its 10 now….
Suj:swara chori ek soch rahi hai…
Swa:vo nothing mom nothing(she smiles faintly)
Rp:Sujata sanskaar chora katthe reh gaya abhi tak aay nahi…
Suj:jii(she was about to say further when thy heared their sanskaar’s voice)
San:mom im back(he smiled and hugs sujata from back and placed a kiss on her cheeks and sujata slaps his cheeks lightly)
Suj:katthe tha tu chora
San:i was struck in my work wese leave it say what u made today hmmmmm…
Suj:bhaii see i dint made anything today my your wife made everything…
San:wowww(he looks towards swara nd gives her a sweet yet painfull smile)
Swa:(smiled back)
San:tohh what u made swara…
Swa:(happily)i made your favourite aloo parantha matar paneer and your most favourite kheer say what u will eat I’ll serve u…
San:hmmm no I’ll eat everything later first ill eat my favourite kheer…
Ap:sit sanskaar
San:ji badi maa(saying this he sits on the chair and swara happily served him)
Lak:Bhai dheere your kheer isn’t running any where(saying this he laughed with sanskaar was eating his kheer like a hungry child)(but suddenly he starts to cough)
Lak:bhai water(he gives sanskaar water sujata makes him drink while swara was rubbing his back having tears in her eyes)
(but sanskaar starts to cough more badly)
Swa:(wet voice)sa…san….sanskaar…sanskaaarr are u ok…
Suj:(worried)tu theek haina chore…
(sanskaar nods his head in yess while coughing)
Rp:laksh call the doctor…
Lak:jii chachu
San:(while coughing)no…(husky voice)im okkk
(sanskaar standup from the chair and starts to gi towards his room but suddenly he spilt’s out blood making everyone horrified)
Swa:(crying)sanskaarrrrrr(he goes towards sanskaar and holds him by his shoulder(to laksh)please jaldhi call the doctor…
Suj(crying)hey mara kanha jii je maare chore ko ke huaa sanskaar…
(sanskaar spilt’s out more blood and blood also starts to come out of his nose he faints on swara’s shoulder making everyone shocked)
Swa:(crying)sanskaarrrrrrrrr
(After sometime)
Sanskar : Srsly Swara, Mom, Bade papa, Laksh, I’m okay and I dont need any doctor!!
Saying this he ran upstairs while everyone else got shocked and concerned. Never in their life they saw such a Sanskar except for that time when he used to love Kavita. Sanskar blamed himself terribly for all the worst he did with Swara, and since sorry was just a mere word he was now frightened to face her after all these things…..
He had lost his self confidence.
He went to his room and immediately locked the door from inside so that no one would come him. Its time for the breakdown. Sanskar removed something from his pocket and sat on his couch panting heavily.
These pills, anti depression pills, which he had been taking for a while now, he carefully looked at the bottle while everyone else had rushed to tap the door of his room harshly.
Everyone were worried for him. Swara was crying bitterly as she was unable to to figure out what was wrong with him since many days…. Each day he would act different, as if he was suffering from some severe mood swings!!
Everyone began to tap the door but Sanskar didnt bother to look and tears started making way through his eyes and he kept looking at the bottle.
(Outside)
Swara (tapped the door) : Sanskaarrr!!!! Openn theee dooor!!!!!!!
Laksh : Bhai, whats wrong with you? Open the door asap!!!
Sujata (crying tapping the door) : Je ke hogaya mhare chhore ko hey bhagwan…Pehle toh aisa na tha je chhora….
RP : Tu rote hi rahegi ya kuch karegi? (Began tapping the door) Sanskarr!!! Open the door!!!!!
AP : I think this wont work. It has been a while m watching him, and I have a feeling something bad is going to happen….Ha Ji, (to Dp) what has happened to our son…(started crying too)
DP : Calm down Annaporna….
Laksh : Maa, Papa, Chachi m going to his room through the window…. I’ll ask somebod to bring me a ladder.
Swara (cried) : SANSKAARR!!!!
Swara knelt down while Ragini pacified her. She herself was in panic… No not only Ragini, there were people who were triple times more in panic than her… The life of their house had shut the door in his room and wasnt coming out.
AP : Dhyan se jaana Laksh….
Swara (to Sujata) : Badi Maa..Mom..(AP knelt down near her cupping her face) Nothing will happen to Sanskar na Maa?? He..He..
Sujata : Chinta mat kar chhori…..Na na…Be strong!!
Swara (crying) : Why isnt he opening the door then…
AP hugged Swara pacifying her.
AP : Dont worry Swara!! Nothing will happen to him…We all r there naa…
Swara kept crying while Laksh had already reached inside Sanskar’s room through the ladder. Sanskar got shocked to see Laksh in his room and he hid the pills inside his pocket.
Sanskar : Lucky, tu??
Laksh (crying and hugged him patting his back) : Sanskarr mere bhai!!! Whats wrong with you?? Why r u acting so strange all of a sudden? There everybod are concerned about you….
Sanskar who was numb noticing the emotions, broke the hug and stepped back.
Sanskar : Leave me alone Laksh! I’m not worthy of anything for godsake! Better if I stay alone…I’ll come out myself when ill feel better…
Laksh (firmly) : No! Unless u wont come out, I wont be going from here too!!
Sanskar : Laksh please!! I said na M fine….
Laksh : Yesterday you had spit blood, and today ur acting as if ur world is shattered….Bhai, Bhai….Swara is back in ur life, so now why are u feeling so….
Sanskar (shouted) : Thats what Laksh!!!! Why is she back in my life!!!!
Laksh was taken aback as he couldnt register what he had just heard…while Sanskar continued…
Sanskar : I..I failed to fulfill her promises Lucky!! And also she failed to fulfill her promises!! All those promises which we made to each other a year ago…..
He recalled all those moments where he promised Swara’s Baba that he wouldnt let a tear escape his daughter’s eye…. and also those moments where Swara promised to trust him always….
Sanskar : And inspite of that she gave both of us an untolerable pain damnit!! Its..its because of her that we…we both have went through so much… And I have an equal hand too!! I added more fuel to the fire!! (Cupped Lakshs face) I tried to hit you with stone!! YES m done with my life!!! I dont deserve anything!! I failed as a life partner, as a brother, and as a good son….
He closed his eyes. Laksh got teary eyed and he cupped his face. “NO Bhai!!! U are the best brother in this world!! And it…it was all because of my stupidity…dont blame yourself for the stupidity I committed!!!!!!!
Sanskar : I dont knoe anything Laksh….Plz leave this room this instant. U are sticking to someone who is not worthy of anything in this world!! (He recalled something) That day too….I couldnt save Swara from falling off the cliff!!!!!
The anti depression pills had their bad effect. But will Swara fail to understand it?
Laksh (put his hand on his shoulder) : You will soon understand ur worth in our lives Bhai!
There everyone are standing outside ur room hoping for u to come out Bhai!! I dont know whats bothering u so much and why!! When u know u r not at fault for anything Bhai!! Infact u r the light of Swara’s life Bhai!! She loves living only for u Bhai!! Still…if u think the same, fine. Close the door and give urself some time!! And come out after you feel better.
Saying this he went out of the room. Sanskar started sobbing, enough was enough. He couldnt bear this damn pain anymore now!!!!!
Sanskar : I.. I love u Swara!! But…M sorry I couldnt fulfill all the promises I made to keep u happy!!
He kept blaming himself for the mistake Swara committed by blaming him for Laksh’s disappearance 6 months back….
He goes towards his closet and takes out something after some time
He opened the best door and ran out of the house ignoring every one…
Swara came following Sanskar after he ran away from her home. Something was really strange, he wouldnt just run away from his home like this. She decided to confront him. She finally caught him sitting on a rock alone, he seemed like he was deeply thinking something.
Swara ran to him panting heavily. Sanskar got shocked seeing her and got up with his eyes widened.
Sanskar : Swara!? What r u doing here??
Swara : I came here to take u back home!!
Swara held his hand and tried to pull him but Sanskar wouldnt respond tonher actions.
Swara (looks at him) : I want to know why are u behaving so strange now a days Sanskar!! (She got teary eyed) First u split out blood last time, then u..u locked yourself inside the room..and..and (she couldnt speak much and had begun sobbing) Tell me Sanskar, what has happened to you?? My Sanskar was already lost when he started feeling alone!!! Sanskar…(she cupped his cheeks) I love u and m always there for you!! He promised to never live each other na!!
Sanskar out down her hands and gripped them together.
Sanskar : To be frank Swara, I myself dont know whats happening to me… Suddenly pangs of sadness of our separation is surrounding me which is…which is killing me to death!! Sometimes I really feel as if ill die with all this…..
Swara (covers his mouth) : Shuttup!!!!!! Dont u dare ever say that again!!! And how many times should I tell you that that was past!!! And…(wioed his tears) U didnt do anything Sanskar!! Infact its me who left you without any reason and thats why its me who should be blamed not you!!
You always fulfilled ur promises Sanskar of standing beside me at every point of my life. But its me who never deserved you!! And….
She couldnt speak as he suddenly engulfed her into a bone crushing hug. Well this was much needed right now, a loud cry and they will be relieved from this damn thing called PAIN.
Swara still wasnt aware about Sanskar taking anti depression pills….
Sanskar : I’m sorry Swara, but eventually I added more fuel to the fire and I have been pestering u from 6 months……
Swara : I love u Sanskar!!! And m sorry… I promise I wont leave u ever again!!!
Sanskar : I promise too!!! Sorry for everything.
Swara : I am sorry too!!!
Swara broke the hug and started going from there.
Swara : Come home Sanskar!!
Sanskar : No. Once Ill feel better I promise ill come. Plz u go…(pills have their effect on him)
Swara : Sanskar itna ziddi mat bano…Come!!
Sanskar : Kaha na nahi…. Tum jao…
Swara : Ok…
She started crossing the road going from there. Suddenly Sanskar’s eyes widened as a truck approached Swara and she wasnt aware of it. His eyes widened as his life was in danger!!
Sanskar : Swaraaa!!!!! Truckkk dekhooo!!!!!!
Swara didnt hear it as Sujata had called her right at that moment and she was telling that Sanskar is fine and will be coming home soon….
Sanskar (life threateningly) : SWARA!!!!!
He had no time and without caring for anyone and anything he started running for his life and all of a sudden pushed Swara harshly and she fell down away from them. She was shocked at the sudden actiom but before she could realise anything all she saw was her life going away right infront of her eyes as the truck hits Sanskar……
Swara (shouting to the pitch) : SANSKAAARRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
She immediately ran and took Sanskar on her lap. She rubbed his cheeks and saw his head was badly bleeding and he was just half conscious.
Sanskar (lightly smiled) : Finally I fulfilled my promise!! Everything…everything has to face me before u!!!!
Swara (vigorously) : Sanskarr!! Sanskarr aankhen kholoo!!! Sanskar…no…dont close ur eyess!!! Why did u do this Sanskarrr!!!!! I..I…
Sanskar : Swara…(still smiling) I love u very much!!
His final words before he fell unconscious on her lap. Swara was numb with shock…… she started crying bitterly and shouted to call the ambulance….
Swara : SANSKAAAARRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(hospital)
Swara;Doctor,he won’t be leaving me.He has promised me to not leave me ever.
Saying this she pushed the doctor aside and rushed to the operation theatre.The inside situation was not tolerable or Swaraa.Her love was lying there,all lifeless,breathing with the support off that oxygen mask,amid all those wires and bandages.
Her legs fell numb as she moved ahead.And to her surprise,he even managed to open his eyes.A small drop of tear escaped from his eyes.He could feel the pain before separation too.Swara cupped his face and tried her level best to not cry..She was his strength.She could not fall weak,not least not in front of him.Sanskar opened his oxygen mask.He had to talk to her.He had to say his last few wors.He would not like to get any interruption by that mask.
Sanskar:Swara,sorry…I am breaking my promise once again.I left you 6 months back once and now again.The difference if that time I was living dead and this time I am approaching towards death.
Swara pressed her palm against his mouth.
Swara:Dare you say that.You aren’t leaving me.We both left each other but why should the punishment be mine only?I can’t see this please Sanskar.You need to return back!
Sanskar;No worries Swara,I have the seven birth ticket of getting married to you.Swara,I know you will take care of the family but I want you to take care of youself.Don’t lose the beauty of your sense or life.
Swara;Nice joke Sanskar.You are my life and you are planning to leave yet you expect me to not lose my life?
Sanskar:Please Swara,I don’t have time.I want the last scene of my life to be a smiling face of yours.
Swara broke down this time.
Swara:Nahii na..please….
Sanskar:Those 3 magical words please??
Swara:Nahi..tum gande hoo..
Sanskar;Isliye toh jaraha hu..
Swara;Sanskar!!Please..why do u love me so much?
Sanskar: I don’t have any answer to your question.I just know that I am glad that I am leaving before you cause I wouldn’t be able to handle your departure. Swara,I won’t be able to leave if you don’t say those words.
Swara:Toh maat jao na..
Sanskar:Don’t make my departure more hard for me.
Swara nods with tears flowing down her cheeks.
Swara went near his ears and whispered with a smiling face,
SWARA:I LOV E YOU.
Sanskar gives a smile:I LOVE YOU MORE
SWARA:I KNOW THAT.AND I AM SORRY FOR THAT.
Sanskar;Ab jauu mein?
Swara smiles and nods.He manages to take her hand and keep it near his heart and closes his eyes.Within the next few seconds Swara could feel no heartbeat.She fell down with a thud.She saw her Sanskar holding her hand tight…He had left her.
With her Sanskar, who was her everything, her love, her only source of living life, her heart and soul, lost; she couldnt speak anything as she was still numb at someone who was gone forever and maybe, wouldnt come back as a body.
….But he would always remain at the left side of her body, something called as HEART. She had devoted her heart only to him and now she made sure he would always remain in her heart.
….As she entered the room requesting the family to be alone for sometime in her room, her eyes caught a camcorder which was lying on the bed. And there it clicked….It was Sanskar’a favourite camcorder!!!! Tears again started making their way through her eyes as if she looked at each and every corner of the room, she could see and visualise only and only Sanskar with a smiling face, and getting romantic with herr……
Just then something strike her mind which made her hands automatically pick up the camcorder in her hands, yet her hands were shaking terribly or rather worse than that because of going through the most painful sorriw of losing her love and her soul…..
She calmly sat on the bed thinking to start the button as she saw the message on a paper stuck to it “Play Me”. And there she clicked….Once a year before she had did the same with Sanskar… Tears started flowing down as she clicked the START BUTTON.
“Swara……”
OMG!!!! The same voice, which she wanted to hear throughout her life!!! The most angelic voice from where her name was said frequently!!!! Swara’s cheeks got more wet with tears……
Swara (caressing the camcorder) : San…Sans…Sanskarr!!!!!!!! Sanskar….Sanskar I am here!!!!!
She started looking here and there in the room feeling his presence besides her on the bed.
She could see a pale and a calm Sanskar but yet the most sweetest and most gorgeous smile didnt left his face. She could feel him, hear him…..
She heard the camcorder still emotionally touched with hearing his voice…..
Sanskar : Swara, you know I love you right and you love me too!! (Swara vigorously nodded her head) I hope you remember that time when we both united at the mandir, and then I asked for your hand from Baba. (Swara closed her eyes recollecting the moments) I took you for the helicopter ride, and then I proposed you and made each and every promise to you which every person does to his love!!
(Now sad voice) But…Affsos hota hai mujhe Swara, that I failed to fulfill them!! Yes Swara, lets face it…We both failed to fulfill those promises. And, those freaking pangs of guilt of doing every bad with you is surrounding me which is brutally killing me to death!!! I am unable to stand this.
Swara, you remember at that time Kavita trapped you into Urvashi maasi’s murder and you went to jail. And that day everything was going to get destroyed because I got unwillingly ready to marry her even if that was to free you from that hell!! Its not me Swara, its because of you we both are married today!!! If you wouldnt have played with your life and come running to the MM, I would have got married to her which would be a big punishment to both of us!!!
But even then Our marriage didnt actually succeed that day because of Laksh betraying Ragini and marrying Kavya. And Swara, when I was supposed to stand up for your sister instead I was just standing in a corner watching and doing nothing to stop Lucky. Also I couldnt stand up for our love when Baba took u to his home. I was scared Swara, I was scared of losing you!!!! Its my own stupidity we have suffered so much in our lives unnecessarily!!!!!
After that, Rajat entered our life. That day I had shot him but he still couldnt stoo his evil intentions and he pulled you also down with him from the cliff holding you as hostage. The biggest pain of my life is losing you Swara!!! And that time even when I held your hand you just fell off because of the stick you were hanging on breaking suddenly…. But even then, I failed to save you and it was because of my ownself that you had to suffer a partial memory loss.
Even that day, when Adarsh bhaiyya and Parineeta bhabhi betrayed all of us and pushed us out of our house I could do nothing but just watch how my own family was getting destroyed… I could do nothing but just do a fight with my brother instead of bringing him on a right track. My own bhaiyya got me fired from my newly found job….
Swara, the most painful thing I had to suffer was Your trust on me broken into pieces. That day after a week when Laksh was disappeared suddenly after our encounter, you blamed me for Laksh’s disappearance. And it was absolutely fine as I had tried to hit my own brother with stone!!!!!
I am still thinking how my family has been bearing me. I have started thinking I am a curse for my family!!! I am good for nothing Swara!!!! I am just good for nothing. The man who couldnt fulfill the promises he made to his father in law, the man who just behaved ill temperedly with his brother who was on wrong path instead of talking to him politely I fought with him beating him black and blue!!! I am a son, who just ran away from his home after my familys rejection on his crush….
I failed to become a perfect husband Swara. I failed to become a supportive brother. Neither I am a good life partner, neither a good brother, nor I am a good son Swara!!!! Yes its true I love you but trust and understanding are always the main elements of love Swara, which I failed to show!!!! I dont deserve someone as pure and intelligent, as a girl like you. I dont deserve your love Swara. I am going out of the house for some time. When ill feel better ill just be back. I just want to be alone for sometime. But, I’LL BE BACK SOON!!!
“I’LL BE BACK SOON”
….This one word kept ringing in her ears and all those things which Sanskar just blurted out to her, through his camcorder…. She could feel as if something brutally stabbed her heart a million times!! Her love, her Sanskar, was going through this damn painful depression and guilt, and how she could not realise this!!!!!
After a silence of 5 minutes where she was fully frozen thinking about all their happy and sad moments, and the words which he just told her, she bursted out crying covering her mouth shouting and panicing calling her Sanskar back to herrr…….
Swara : Sanskaaarrrrrr!!!!!!! (Sobbing badly) I love you Sanskar!!!!! Please come backk Sanskarr!!!!! (She face palmed her face still not getting over the terrible lose of her life)
(Swara’s POV)
Its not at all Sanskar who should feel guilty and apologise. Infact it is me. Its me who failed to understand you Sanskar and so its me who doesnt deserve you. Still you loved me till eternity (still sobbing)
She got up and walked towards the desk where her love her Sanskar who was smiling in the photoframe. She caressed his smiling face and picked it up.
“You…You are the gem of the person love!!!! Ur the best husband, best lover, any girl would wish for!!!! You are the best brother someone would die for!!!! You are the best son one could have!!! You are the life of this house Sanskar!!!! And its you who lessened the differences between a Marwadi and a Bengali religion!!! Its just because of you that all these fights got over regarding the Marwadi and Bengali lifestyles Sanskar!!!!
That day I understand it was too hard for you to escape Kavita and save me and I understand your helplessness. But when That day I finally broke the ghatbandhan of you and Kavita it was you who tactfully uncovered the truth infront of the family, the police, the lawyer!!! Because of you justice once again took forth!!! Everything was back to right…..
And now dont tell me that you regret to send me with Baba away that day. Sanskar, your eyes have always been the mirror to your heart and neither you wanted to see me in pain nor Ragini….U didnt care about yourself and did the right thing you felt….And standing up for me at that time, wouldnt have been correct. But you considered the situation and you asked me to go with Baba and I shouldnt reject him!! You have also always showed Laksh the right path even if its on your own way, but you always wanted the good and sometimes we have to forget something to bring someone on right path!!!!
You have been the best companion Sanskar one would ever wish or ask for!!!
That day when I was held hostage by Rajat, it was you who had saved me but then it was Rajat who pulled me along with him!! You held my hand, Couldnt I had seen what were you going through!!! You were about to cross anything to save me Sanskar!!! And its not because of you that I had to suffer a memory loss Sanskar, and at that time whatever and however I spoke to you I still feel ashamed!!!!
You, are the most supportive son of our family Sanskar!! You are our family’s strength!! You are the support pillar of our family who is strong enough to go through everything and save his family!!! When Adarsh bhaiyya was throwing us out of the house you were the support pillar of Badi Maa and Bade Papa!!! You underwent through everything for ur family!!! And that day, it was proved that Its me who doesnt deserve your love when I didnt trust you and instead blamed you for Laksh’s disappearance. Just because of me we both had to bear this painfull long separation of 6 months!!!!! Just because of me you went through sooo much Sanskarr!!! (Started crying badly) AND IF TODAY YOU ARE NO LONGER WITH ME BEING MY SUPPORT SYSTEM THEN EVEN FOR THIS ITS BRUTALLY AND ENTIRELY MY AND MY FAULT FOR NOT UNDERSTANDING YOU AT EVERY POINT OF LIFE!!!!!! I couldnt see your pain and depression despite your smiles Sanskarr and so its me who should be blamed!!!!! BUT I LOVE YOU SANSKAARRRR AND I ALWAYS PROMISED TO BE THE BEST LIFE PARTNER BUT ITS ME WHO FAILED SANSKAR NOT YOU!!!!!!!!
She knelt down with a thud and started crying holding Sanskar’s photoframe close to her heart. “I am sorry.” She kissed his photo and again covered it in her embrace.
Moments had just become memories….. which would never get repeated….. She felt guilty and cursed for not understanding Sanskar’s pain and depression all this while when she was with him!!!! This thing stabbed her heart more…..
Stories dont always end happily….There is a painful end too.
Like ishq saccha Wohi jisko milti nahi manzile hainaa?
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????????? guys we know u all must be thinking to kill uss but me sara dont wanna die without marrying zain and shivani too dont wanna die without marrying varun
?in our dreams obviously but but we have a solution tooo if u guys want a sequel of this story with a perfect ending then feel free too say we are always ready to write do share your views till then this is shivra shivani sara sining off byeeee…