TITLE: WHY CAN’T YOU LOVE ME
A/N;
Before you all start
I would like you all to watch the trailer Click Here
“Love and life are like reel words , they aren’t connected in real and for god’s sake leave me alone ”
“Why don’t you believe in love swara”
“Sanskarrr its enough ,i know you will not leave so its better to get myself out”
But sanskar held her hand and pulled her
“Swara i did not love you to leave you alone and why do you hate the word love ,why do you hate all the things related to love ,why can’t you love me swara?”
Swara kept quiet and made her way towards the door
“Answer me dammit “sanskar shouted
Swara kept on walking and walking until her feet hurt.
Getting tired with her life she just did not know where to go to ease her pain, ease her aching heart which only belonged to one person the day she entered her college
She sat in an unknown place for sometime and stared the rock beside her like she was ready to burn it with her sorrows
‘Why me’ was the question in her mind .’Why can’t life make easy things, are we the ones making it difficult ‘she thought
She got up after some time and made her way back home
~~Home~~
You just stop giving your opinion ,stay qui-(left unsaid seeing swara)
“Why can’t you guys plan to make whole area know that you all are fighting because my di is doing a love marriage and their rituals are different, besides you don’t try to understand the other
Great ! Just great ..btw continue your ranting
I am in my room ,please leave me alone for today and i am not going college tomorrow
So…yeah ,have fun”swara said
“shona ,shooooonaaa”shomi tried to stop her but thought to give her space
Room
As soon as she entered she took her guitar and sat by the window
Closed her eyes and sang her heart out
“Sun mere humsafar
Kya tujhe itni si bhi khabhar
Ki teri sansein chalti jidhar
Rahungi bas vahin umra bhar haaye
Kitni haseen yeh mulakaate hai
SHE REMEMBERED HER FIRST MEET WITH ‘ ‘HIM’ ,THAN HER BECOMING HIS CLASSMATE ,HER JOINING HIS GROUP EVEN THOUGH DISTANCING HERSELF FROM HIM.HOW ,HER IRRITATING EVERYONE MADE HIM FALL FOR HER CHARM FOR WHICH SHE FEARED THE MOST
She stopped singing and got into the memories of today and remembered sanskar saying ‘i love you’
Her fresh tears were the evidence of her loving him more than he does
“Why can’t i love you sanskar ,why can’t I”she shouted not able to hold her pain
Just then there was a knock ,she quickly composed herself and ragini entered her room by the time with her dinner
“Cutie here i am keeping your dinner and i am sorry i am the reason of the arguements
But i did not chose to fall in love it just happened”she said with no emotions
Swara ran to her nd engulfed her in a tight hug
“No di ,its not at all your fault ,love just happens and you don’t worry i will make your every function successful and you know your shonu ,there is no one who can stop me from doing what i want hehe”swara said giving a fake laugh
Ragini chuckled
“Ohk now sleep early ,don’t night out with movies..bye”
“Di don’t take stress ,it will be fine ;good night”she said and kissed her cheek
“Gud nyt cutie”
After she went
Swara sighed taking her dinner and sat on bed and attached a pen drive to her laptop and started watching a Hollywood romantic movie ‘A Walk to Remember’
She started the movie and was watching until she started imagining her and sanskar in their places
She just pitied herself .Ending the thoughts she took the dinner plate and got down to keep it and also to take chocolates to get the depression out.
10 chocolates a day was a normal routine for her
She got in her bed and had the chocolates to ease her pain until she fell asleep
Next day
As she planned she was not going to college but her group had to convince her because sanskar can’t live without seeing her one single day even though angry .
She was told that the one for whom she is not coming college is absent today for which she agreed unfortunately getting trapped in their plan
She just got angry and got to library and warned everyone to stay away from her
They all were concerned about her behaviour these days ,she was not the old one , the bubbly one.
She made herself aloof from all things related to HIM
She was in library and sanskar was outside the library waiting for her as he knew she would not like his presence around her
But little did he know that vikrant was in the same library
Library
“Hey swara ,you toh forgot only humka
I am a jabra fan of your this damn hot body”he said
“What’s this nonsense vikrant and please stop this filthy language”
“Come on swara ,i have the right to see and touch what’s mine”he said and in a swift moment the his hand was roaming sensously on her hand to shoulder and held it tight
She felt disgusted for which she kicked him hard and he fell but her shoulder material of top got ripped and she was just shocked
Covering shoulder with stole,she packed her things she ran from the library area looking back just than she collided with a person
She said sorry and was going to run
But he caught her hand and pulled her
“Swara are you okay, look its me sanskar
Everything’s alright?” He asked patting her back feeling her tensed
“Y–eah iiii-ii j—ust wannnt you to stay away”she said and pushed him and ran away
He was confused but then his confusion was all cleared seeing vikrant coming out of library
“How dare you vikrant “he said and caught his collar and punched him so hard that his lips were bleeding hard
Leaving him he went to find swara but she was nowhere to be found
He called his group immediately
“What happened sanskar”
“Its not the time to answer i will tell you everything once i find her ,kritika just call swara’s sister and ask if she’s home ohk?”
“Yeah just a sec”
“Sanskar she’s not yet home”she added ending the call
“Damn where is she?”he said punching the wall
“Hey we did not check the washroom area”sanskar said remembering something
“Girls can you check on her please”sanskar added.
“Of course she is our bestie too”
“Comeon girls”
They divided themselves and went in every washroom area when they found her in one of them
Seeing her washing her face and hand continuously rhea was shocked
She immediately called them there
Rhea consoled swara by the time and took her outside the washroom
Seeing her pale was all what he was not wanting her to be .
He went near her to which she distanced herself
“Rhea can you take her to your apartment today?”sanskar asked to which swara looked at him
“Her family would not be able to hold the pain,kritika you inform her sister please”
“No i am fine”swara replied looking down
“Can you just zip your mouth”sanskar said bein angry
He picked her up and said
“I will drop her at rhea’s apartment ,you all should leave guys ,its late”
He took her to his bike and made her sit before him in a way like she was hugging him from front(which is the cover)
He took her to rhea’s apartment while she was asleep
He put her down on bed and asked whether he can stay here for today
“Rhea i don’t want to leave her alone that’s the reason i am saying this ,i know its your apartment and you won’t feel comfortable but i can’t let her alone.i know you are with her but its just am worried and can you change her top ,while coming here i saw it was torn”he said in a go
“Don’t wrry sanskar you can stay .. there is an extra room ,you can stay there.I will be with swara, what if she needs something and i will change her clothes”
“Thank you so much rhea”having a last glance of swara he left to the other room
Night
Swara woke up in midnight for water ,she searched for it but couldn’t get it
She saw rhea who was sleeping soundly
She thought to fetch herself and went to kitchen to have water
After having water she heard some wierd noises which scared her ,she ran to her room and pulled the blanket to her face and slept but sleep was away from her .
She tried to wake up rhea
“Let me sleep aman”she said
Swara tensed got down her blanket and thought to check
She got down of the blanket ,her feet trembling .She made her way towards the hall area to find another room
She got in the room only to find sanskar sleeping on bed but again she heard some noises and ran inside his room and locked it
She got in his bed and snuggled to him ,remembering today’s incident she pushed herself more close to him such that her head was on his chest
Sanskar woke up due to her snuggling but pretended to be asleep and tightened his arms around her
Feeling protected ,she too slept
~~Morning~~
Sanskar woke up with a smile but soon it faded finding her nowhere
He thought maybe she would have joined rhea for breakfast but he found her sleeping
He checked the bathroom but then he found the chit in hall
‘Thank you for being with me rhea and sanskar ,i am going home ,don’t worry’
Swara
“Why the hell she decides to do all the stuff by herself .What if vikrant? No no no
Sanskar you have to check on her”
He called swara but no reply
He called again and again but same , last time she answered the call.
“Why are you disturbing me sanskar ,can’t you stay away ?”
“Hell no ! you know how worried i was here thinking that maybe vikrant have got you or maybe some other difficulty would have occured . Is this a joke for you?
You know what swara you can never care for others .”saying this he cut the call
Swara stared her phone for couple of minutes but than thought about it deeply
“Wohoo i won ,without any planning mr.maheshwari you started getting irritated and soon you will hate me ,so 1 point to swara bose yippee”swara said dancing
“Swara now you have to get going to college for your first plan in effect”
She was going down when she heard her parents saying
“Shekhar i have full faith on swara ,she won’t cross her limits with any guy and fall in love”
“Sharmishta its her life why don’t you understand ,she can choose her life partner”
This they started arguing again
She got down ,stopped them and assured them that she won’t go against them and hugged her papa as he understands so well
It is said daughters are like gem to their fathers . Indeed they are.
On her way
She was thinking that choosing her love would surely make her parents divorced and she had a younger brother whom she loved a lot inspite of their fights.She can’t let him go through depression.
She can’t make the mistake her sister did but so then why from the first time she met him ,her heart was not ready to distance herself from him.
But this is life and she can’t help her fate
She got to college
As her group was in canteen , she went there.
“Hey guys ? ,whats up?
Its ceiling ???hehe”she said and laughed
All were happy as she is back
“Sanskar would be very happy seeing you like this” rhea said knowing sanskar is back of her
Sensing sanskar back she thought to apply her plan
“That loser can do anything but roam around me ,he would surely fail in his entrance which is in the next two months .I mean seriously guys how can someone waste his time this much.Loser”she said angrily but closed her eyes took a deep breathe and put on a smile
“Swara ,are you mad.Sanky was with you whole night after that incident and all you do is praise him this way”nikhil said
“Actually you know what,you don’t deserve him “arun added
“Please guys no word against her”sanskar said coming from back
“And you swara ,now this loser will show you how to win”
“Of course “she said giving sarcastic smile and got going
But he pulled her angrily where all thought to leave them alone
“Why can’t you love me”he asked
“Who can love a loser?”
“Is my love not enough for us ,what should i do to prove my love..,i can die for you”
“What should i do after your death ,like a loving partner i should just cry for you
You know what sanskar you become that loser but i cannot be.Enjoy your life,loser”she said near his ear
“Be ready to call me by other name”he said and left angrily
She smiled
She was very happy as sanskar was going to prove himself and concentrate on his career not on her .How can he know that she had a hard time saying the words to him.
” 2 points goes to swara for a great acting”she said patting herself
Not able to keep her happiness to herself she got in an empty classroom and started dancing
“Why are you dancing like a maniac?”someone said
“Why you always have to follow me sanskar”
“Seeing me broken makes you happy right?”
“Yes ,indeed”she said smiling widely(in mind)
How can i tell you it pains me too
“Great ,than i have to beat your words and be the winner”
“Winners don’t waste time dreaming about their ‘so called success'”she said emphasizing making double inverted commas by fingers and went
After three months
Day of result of sanskar’s exam
“Hey guys sanskar is the second highest ranker in his entrance ,congrats sanskar”arun said
“So swara got your answers to your filthy thinking?”rhea said
“I don’t care”saying this she went out
Sanskar eyed rhea to which she shrugged
Sanskar went back of her and stood by her side
“Sanskar lets end this okay
I want you to stay away from me and i mean it and now that you will opt for a different college ,i want you not to try finding about me and its a request please”she said
“You can’t love me,can you?”
“I can’t sanskar ,i hope you can do this much for me to be happy and please forget me”
“If this is what makes you happy than ohk”
“Thank you “she said and smiled
Sanskar was going when swara said
“But we can be friends”
“Yeah sure”
“But friends hug each other”swara said just getting an excuse to hug him for last time
Sanskar not about to hold anymore hugged her tight not letting her go
Swara controlled herself and said him to let her go
And said bye
~~After 2 years~~
“And the ‘LIVING FOR YOU’ painting exhibition of artist sanskar hits the bar of tremendous success”swara read happily
She then took a sketch of him and said
“I am so happy sanskar it seems you are living my dream,but i am happy that i left mine of being an artist,you would not have opted for fine arts if you would have known i too wanted a seat in the same college as yours ,but i am so happy for you and see today is my marriage .You are happy ,aren’t you”she said with tears
“Shonaa come on the baraat has arrived”
“Yes di coming
I can’t love you sanskar”saying this she kissed his photo and went
After a year
“Swara i am just tired of these arguments”
“Even i am ,why do you always have to point out my bads”
“Because you are just a kiddish girl who don’t know how to behave infront of colleagues”
“So lame excuse vikram ,why don’t you say the real reason of these arguments
You know what i am divorcing you
Here are the papers signed ,you have to end this relation or i have my ways
I can’t live in relation where my husband just cannot bear my friendliness with anyone ”
“Here ,take it and get lost”he said angrily
“Even i don’t want to stay here”
Saying this she packed her bags and not able to say it to her parents shifted to mumbai where she can start a job with her degree
She had money for her travelling ,she thought about apartment cost but decided to deal about it later
~~Mumbai~~
“Sir but i promise to work hard and be loyal to the company”
“Out i said”
“For her simple b.com degree ,she couldn’t get in anywhere”
She did not have an apartment too
“I can apply as a bar tender ,yes swara its a nice idea”she said to herself
“She got in many restaurants where in one of them she secured the job of waitress”
She was happy as she can atleast have proper meals
She worked whole day , slept in street benches.
In morning she sang as a street singer because it was her way of remembering sanskar,people would give her some money ,sometimes throw on her but she kept on singing for she felt peace but still she couldn’t get enough to buy her a small house
One day
“Sun mere humsafar
Kya tujhe itni si bhi khabhar
Ki tere saansein chalti jidhar
Rahungi bas vahi umra bhar haaye
Muskurana bhi tujhi se sikha hai
Dil lagane ka tu hi tarika hai
Aitbaar bhi tujhise hota hai
Raho na hosh mein main kabhi
Bahon mein hai meri zindagi
Sun mere—–“she stopped hearing some voice
“Swara?”
She closed her eyes tightly thinking it as a dream but no it was the reality ,her past and she had to face him one day
She looked up and saw him getting out of the car
His chocolate eyes, his tall figure ,he wasthe same handsome and hot . He had grown beard too which gave him s*xy look
“Hii sanskar”she said happily
“How are you?”he said still not able to see her situation
“I am just fine ,how about you ?”
“Yeah-hh umm f-ine”
“Okay and your wife,hows she doing?”
“I am not married swara”
“Sanskar why did not you move on”
“I could not swara ,i could not”
“Why can’t you love me?”he added
Not this time , not this time she would let him go. She clung to him embracing him tightly
“I am tired sanskar ,i am tired pretending to hate you ,i can’t do this anymore ,i can’t bear this anymore
I w-want t-oo love you like you love me “she said crying more
“What….say it again?”
“I love you sanskar”
“Really?”
“I can do anything for you ,i can die for you too”she said still sobbing
“Shh shhh what will i do swara after your death,you define me”he said kissing her forehead
“And you are not living like this ,come home with me”he said
“No sanskar i can’t ,its your home and–”
“Uffo why did i got so stubborn girlfriend”
“Because you just got hehe i am so smart na?”
“Yes you are ,now come on get in the car”
“Wait a sec”
She took the money which she earned from her singing and went to the beggers sitting there and gave them
Sanskar was smiling all the while
“Sanskar i did right ,didn’t i?”
“Yes my gf “he said giving a light kiss on her lips
“What was that’?”she said touching her lips
“Comeon”
After few months
“The husband and wife painting exhibition gets everyone mad and crazy for their work”
She read smilingly
“Why can’t you love me?”sanskar said teasingly romancing with her
“Your parents and my mother are still angry”she said teasing him
“Done”he said kissing her neck
“I am still angry”
“For?”
“For not stopping me back there Mr.Maheshwari”she said and kissed him passionately
“I love you sooooooo much”she said cutely
“Hmm i have to think about this proposal”he said laughing but swara too joined him
~~the end~~