CHUDAILBAAZ (EPISODE-5)

Yaayyy!!! Back with our ff. No gyaan today just read and enjoy. I know some major dramas in IB are on its way but still we tried to make all of you to feel relieved. Please do read and drop all your views.

EPISODE- 5
Howrah Bridge is shown. A bangali babu and his wife is standing at one side of the bridge in the pose of ROSE and JACK of TITANIC. Yes right the man is Shivay and the woman is Anika. Shivaay is wearing a crisp white cotton dhooti and kadak starched panjabi while Annika is wearing a beautiful red bordered silk saree. Shivay dropped his hand suddenly to hold his dhoti which was on the verge of opening.
Shivay: fhat the wuck….
Looking at Shivaay’s condition Annika starts laughing and taunting him
Anika: Billu ne dhoti pehni, Billu bana Bangali, Billu ki dhoti khul gayi, Billu ki gaal par chayi sharm ki laali

(Billu wore dhoti, Billu became Bengali, Billu’s dhoti loosened, Billu became embarrassed)
Shivay looked up to his wife and gave her a death glare. Anika stopped taunting and made him handle the dhoti correctly. At this Shivaay Pulls Annika closer for a kiss and suddenly the scene transforms them into Om and Gauri dancing in Bengali song. Suddenly a sound “DHAM” brought back our great Gauri Kumari Sharma from the world of dreams. Yes this was the dream of THE DABANG GAURI KUMARI SHARMA. Gauri’s eyes went broad when she noticed Om holding and saving Sutlu from falling down due to slippery washroom floor. The “DHAM” sound was of the broomstick falling on the floor.
Few mins back. Om is thinking about sutlu while gauri is sleeping. Suddenly his eyes shift towards gauri whose sleep was getting disturbed due to the sun rays falling on her eyes. He just goes and puts the curtains properly. And then he goes to her sees her hair all messes up and falling on her face. He puts that properly which awakes her. They share an intense eye lock. Scene shifts to the door of the room where Sutlu was keeping an eye on him. Gauri smiles faintly and went back to sleep again and Om comes out from Gauri’s eyes in a jerk and sees someone at the door. But by then sutlu has left. He gets doubt and goes to him/her while Gauri goes back to dream land. Om caught that person peeping through the door and the person hurriedly enters Om’s room with a broom stick to clean the washroom. Om follows him.

Om: hmm… to tum the??
(hmm… so you were there??)
Sutlu: haan… wo to mai…. wo mai..
(yeah…. Actually i… i..)
Om: tumhare lips ko madhumakkhi ne kaat liye the ye to mujhe pata tha par ab tumhe bakri ne kaat liya hai kya?
(I was sure that bees cut your lips but now did goat cut you?)
Sutlu: kya matlab?
(what do you mean?)
Om: matlab tum ye bakri ki tarah mai mai karna band karogi?
(I mean why are you sounding like a goat??)
Sutlu: haaannn?? Oohh haan.

(haann?? Ooohhh …)
Om: good ab batao mere kamre me jhaank kyun rahi thi?
(good.. now say why were you peeping like that?)
Sutlu: mujhe wo washroom saaf karna tha to…
(actually I came here to clean the washroom… so…)
Om: okk… par mujhe aisa kyun lag raha hai ki maine tumhe kahin dekha hai
(okk… but why am I feeling I saw you some where)
Sutlu: wo.. wo..

(actually… I mean…)
Sutlu was in shock and was thinking of some excuse and after sometime she answers.
Sutlu: bhaisaab…. Apko kya mai chokariya lag rhi hu?
(brother…. Am I looking like a girl in front of you?)
Om: what??
Sutlu: phir aap mujhse aise kyun baat kar rahe hai? Mai aapki servant hu aur aap to dikhte bare shareef hai…. Aise to insaan nhi lagte aap.
(then why are you talking to me like that? I am your servant…… and you also look like a good guy… then…)

Om is still busy watching her face and thinking what is wrong and was trying to identify the actual person. The power puff eyes were reminding him of someone. He gets a feeling of Déjà vu…. Like he used to get seeing Chulbul. While he is busy thinking all this sutlu tries to take advantage and leave from there. But she slips due to the water and slippery floor and om catches her. The broomstick falls down from her hand making a “DHAM” sound. This awakens our Gauri Kumari Sharma from her land of dreams. Her eyes went broad watching her pati parmeshwar holding their servant like that. Meanwhile Om gets even more bigger shock than he used to get from chulbul and he leaves him in a jerk and he falls down.
LAGE CHARSO CHALIS VOLT CHUNE SE TERE….. song was being played at the background.
Om: wo kya tha?? (what was that??)….. he starts to hum the song “LAGE CHARSO CHALIS VOLT CHUNE SE TERE”

While sutlu watches him with horror and thinking
Sutlu: mujhe gaane kyu sunayi de rhe hain….
(why my ears are ringing… why am I hearing a misuca…)
Then she realizes Om was humming a song and gets up from the floor. But seeing OMLU our dabangg Gauri harharaike gets up staring both of them angrily and gets in action. She gets out her marble collection and throws them on the floor near OMLU. They both fall with a crashing bang.
Gauri (angrily): omkara ji aap theek to hai na.
(omkara ji are you alright?)

Om: yes Gauri I am fine
Om then looks upto Gauri who was already staring him angrily.
Om: tum jo soch rahi ho wo nhi kar raha tha mai…. wo to mai….
(I was not doing that you were thinking of…. I was actually….)
Gauri: aapko kaise pata ki mai kya soch rahi thi matlab mai jo soch rahi thi aap wahi kar rahe the……
(how do you know what I was thinking… that means you were doing that only that I was thinking..)
Om: nhi meri Gauri… mai jhut nhi bolta tum bhi jaanti ho…

(no my Gauri… I don’t lie.. you also know that)
Gauri gets convinced now as she know really her Omkara ji never lie. She now shifts her angry stare to Sutlu…..
Gauri: wayse Omkara ji…. Humari chati indri ne hume bataya ki aap kisi shaatir chiraiyya k sath hain
(by the way Omkara ji… my chati indri indicated me you are now surrounded by some shatir chiraiya…(wicked girl))

Sutlu gets confused. He was still now on floor looking at both of them and expecting someone will help him in getting up. But soon she realizes nothing like that will happen and gets up by her own. Gauri was still staring him. Sutlu tries to explain.
Sutlu: Aapki kya..chati…shaatir…. whatever… mera matlab dekhiye madam main koi chiraiya nahi hun..main to bas apna kaam kar raha tha tabhi sir yahan aa gaye.. Mujhe bht sara kaam hai..
(whaatt… your chati…shaatir…. whatever… madam I am not a girl… I came to do my work over here…. And now I have so many works to do)

And he runs from there while omri are standing confused.
The scene shifts to Pinky’s room. The 3rd snake is wrapped around Pinky’s neck, while she is dreaming about all the jewelry she will pester Shaktiji to buy for her. Suddenly a huge wicked smile shows up on her face!
Pinky (in dreams): Yay! Shaktiji is finally mujhe diamond ki jwelleries gold se bane hue… aye haye…de rahe hai.

(Yay! Shaktiji is finally getting me that designer diamond studded Gold necklace! )
The cold touch of the necklace (in her dream) was bringing some thandak (relief) to her kaleja (heart) cold cold heart!. And she wants to jump out of joy and touch the necklace. Her smile turns even more evil. Pinky realizes something wrapped around her neck in real.
Pinky (thinks): are wah shakti ji mujhe abhi se diamond necklaces pahena rahe hai? Aise to kaleje par thankdak nhi par rhi uss Anika ki wajah se chalo kam se kam isi se khush ho lungi
(arree waah.. Shakti ji is making me to wear a diamond necklace? Already my heart is wrenching due to that Anika but will now feel some peace inside my heart due to this necklace)
Pinky touches the so called diamond necklace to feel it but it feels warm and dry. (Yes to our surprise snakes are warm to touch!)
Pinky: are ye to necklace nahi.. Rassi jaisa kuch hai… shakti ji mujhe rassi se marna chahte hai par kyun kyun kyun?? Accha ab samjhi.. Us kameeni kamini ne phir se koi jadu kar diya shaktiji k upar.. Ab paani sar se upar ja raha hai..is kameeni ka kuch to karna padega….. Eyestars ko kaam pe lagati hun.

(arree.. this is not necklace… seeming like a rope…. Shakti ji wants to kill me using this… but why why why??? Ohhh now I understood…. May be that kameeni kamini again used her black magic powers on my Shakti ji…. Now it’s too much… I should use Eyestars for teaching a lesson to that Kameeni)
The 3rd snake gets thrown on the floor. It crawls up the bed and bites her neck. Huge red swellings and blisters start forming on her neck and face. Making Dinky look like the blobs of koftas in a kofta curry. With the itching from the swelling Dinky finally wakes up to scratch her face, and the horror movie plot of 6 snakes surrounding her meets her eyes! She is terrified! Her big bulging psycho eyes almost pop out of her eye socket with sheer terror. Pinky discovers those blobs on her feet and hands as well. Soon she realises snakes bitten her terribly and she is still alive after that. She rejoices after realizing and jumps from her bed.
Pinky: ruko snakes ke bachhe…… mere beauty sleeps ki oh my maataa kar di ruko…

(wait… you snakes… wait… you did oh my maataa of my beauty sleep wait…)
The remaining three snakes also bit Pinky turn by turn in the mean while. Pinky’s eyes went broad making her to look like chudailo ki chudail. All the six snakes crawled away after feeling the great naagin and chudailo ki chudail in front of them.
The itch from her face and neck makes Pinky want to scratch the parts so bad, and she wants to get up and apply some anti-itch cream and see, what’s going on with her face. She gets down from the bed to go to the dressing table to retrieve the cream. Just as Pinky looks up at the mirror of the dressing table at her blotchy, swollen, red, kofta curry face she screams looking at her own face.
Pinky: mummmmeeeyyyyyyy…….. bhhhhooootttt

(mummmmeeeyyyyyyy……..ghhoo…sssstttt)
And Pinky faints. After this the snake charmer again comes and uses his pied piper like flute to recapture his 6 snakes back! (In case you are wondering why our snakes were such gentlemen in taking turns at attacking Pinky, well these snakes have also taken training in the same school of arts where all goondas in movies attack characters turn by turn!).
Mr. Snake Charmer takes the money from Sutlu and indicating a behosh (passed out) Pinky to Sutlu says
Mr. Snake Charmer: babua…. Mera kaam to khatam
(Babua…. my job here is done!)

And he leaves with his ragtag bunch of snakes! Sutlu goes near Pinky and checks her pulse rate, then satisfied, she rushes out and calls KK.

PRECAP: WAIT AND WATCH…. THE HELICOPTER I MEAN CHOPPER ATTACK STARTS..

So how was the journey of torturing Pinky ponky dinky donkey??? Want some more torture then please stay tuned. Now let’s get started with credit part.
CREDIT FOR THE FF- BELA
CREDIT FOR PLOTS- VISHAKHA

CREDIT FOR THE TOTAL PINKY TORTURE- NIVEDITA
CREDIT FOR SOME CHANGES AND BIT CHANGES OF DIALOGUES- NILASH
Nivi di today I will also join in replying part as got very bored from studies so just want a break so decided to reply all our readers. But THANK YOU so much for replying all of them on our behalf. Love you di. And one more very important thing. SORRY DI I KNOW YESTERDAY I BORED YOU A LOT ACTUALLY I WENT INTO DEPRESSION FOR SOME REASONS SO JUST ALL MY DEPRESSION CAME OUT AT THE TIME OF OUR CHUDAILBAAZ. SORRY please apne is choti si pagli si cute si NILU ko maaf kar do please.