When He Fell for Her (Adni FF) Part 10

Part 10:

Chandni entered her room, sitting on the bed her eyes flooded with tears “he was trying to save my life and I misunderstood him, even abused him and got Naani to scold him, and he bore all this in silence” she thought to herself. “I did wrong to him this time, I owe him an apology, and he saved my life I should also thank him, but why should I thank him for anything? He is right about himself he is the same monster who destroyed my life. If he is in this hell right now then he deserves to be there, I’m neither apologizing nor thanking him” she thought ruefully. “What is wrong with me why I’m having confused feelings for him? He is a monster, a monster, a monster that’s it” she thought helplessly. “But why I am feeling bad for hurting him?” she was glaring at her hands with confusion in her eyes. “I should talk to Naani, she will tell me the right thing to do” finally she reached a decision.

“Cheeku do you want me to clear the misunderstanding on your behalf?” Naani asked him hoping that he would say yes. “No Naani let it be as it is, it’s good that she hates me and sees me as a monster that’s what I really am, she needs to hate me, maybe hating me can lessen the pain I have inflicted upon her” he told Naani in a tired voice. (I’ve tried to explain Advay’s pain and what he really wants from life right now through this song.)

My darkest days – Without you
“If I had my way
I’d spend every day right by your side
And if I could stop time
Believe me I’d try for you and I
And each moment you’re gone
Is a moment too long in my life
So stay right here, right now
‘Cause without you I’m a disaster
(The moment you go)
And your my ever after

(Just thought you should know)
‘Cause I need to know your answer
(Just say you’ll stay with me)
I want you to say you’re gonna stay with me
(Just say you’ll stay with me)
I die every day that you’re away from me

If the world ceased to spin
You could start it again with just one smile
If the seas turn to sand
With the wave of your hand it would rain for miles
But the thought of you gone
Makes everything wrong in my life

So stay right here, right now” But deep down in his heart he knew that he wanted Chandni to forgive him, to trust him and if she wasn’t able to love him then at least he wanted her to stop hating him. But he deliberately decided to live in this hell; yes her hatred for him was a hell for him and he had to live with it to repent his sin. He was giving himself pain hoping that seeing him in pain would lessen Chandni’s pain.

“Cause without you I’m a disaster
(The moment you go)
And you’re my ever after
(Just thought you should know)’Cause I need to know your answer
Just say you’ll stay with me)

I want you to say you’re gonna stay with me
(Just say you’ll stay with me)
I die every day that you’re away from me
My heart breaks with every beat
I can’t explain what you do to me
So just say you’ll promise me
Please, take me if you ever leave
But the thought of you gone
Makes everything wrong in my life

So stay right here, right now” “But Cheeku what’s the point in hiding the truth and letting her hate you, my child if you want to lessen her suffering then don’t give her a reason to hate you, give her a reason to trust you, a reason to live her life and a reason to be happy again” Naani tried to put some sense in him. “Naani I’m your grandson, I’m your blood and I know that you are the only person who loves me most in this world, that’s why you think that I’m worthy of forgiveness. But just once put yourself in Chandni’s shoes and tell me that it’s easy to forget & forgive my sin, it’s easy to forget & forgive that I raped her and it’s easy to forget & forgive that I destroyed her life” he flinched on his own words and silent tears of agony made their way from his eyes but he had to make Naani understand that it was never going to happen that Chandni would forgive him and accept his proposal, he was losing all hopes of redemption.

“Cause without you I’m a disaster
(The moment you go)
And you’re my ever after
(Just thought you should know)
‘Cause I need to know your answer
(Just say you’ll stay with me)

I want you to say you’re gonna stay with me
(Just say you’ll stay with me)
I die every day that you’re away from me
So just say you’ll promise me
Please, take me if you ever leave
My heart breaks with every beat

I die every day that you’re away from me” “You are wrong Cheeku. Deep down in my heart I know that one day Chandni will forgive you and she will realize your love for her, I just know that” Naani rejected all his reasons. “Naani have you forgotten that we have been down this road before the only difference is that Chandni is where Maa was 32 years ago and I’m in the place of that son of a b*t*h. How hard you tried to make Maa forget her sufferings and move on from her past, but it was never easy for her to look away from her past and trying to make a happy future for herself, she died because of her heartbreak. I can’t let that happen to Chandni, all my life I feared to be just like him and see I’ve turned just like him or even worse than him” Advay choked on his words and without listening any other word of Naani he left the room and locked himself in the study.