Chapter 14 – Part One – Krishna’s POV
‘You know, don’t you?’ I asked in shock.
‘Yes, I know.’ Yuvan said calmly. I could see his anger increasing. He grit his teeth and clenched his fists. He looked at both of us and stormed off in anger rushing towards the house. I quickly ran to Yuvan calling him. He stormed to his room.
‘Yuvan, Yuvan…..How did you find out?’ I asked.
‘I was stressed and upset as I had a tough day at work. Yuvani thought I was upset because Sayyam told me about you two. She tried to change the subject, but I made her tell me the truth.’ He said in anger.
‘Yuvan, please, let me explain.’ I said trying to catch my breath.
He slammed his hand on his desk and turned to face me.
‘Yes, please explain!! Please explain to me how two people who couldn’t even stand the sight of each other suddenly decide they want to be with together?!’ He shouted in anger.
I was crying uncontrollably, this was the reaction I was afraid of.
‘I-I don’t know how and when it happened.’ I said struggling for words.
He picked up a glass from his desk and threw it at a wall.
‘I told you I love you!! What is it? Huh? Is it lust? Sayyam can’t even stay in a relationship for more than 5 minutes. What makes you think with YOU he will be any different?!’ He kept shouting furiously.
‘What was it, did he charm you?!’
‘No, no it’s not like that.’ I said quietly.
‘Then what is it like?? Do you love him? Is that it??’
‘All I know is- is that I need him.’ I couldn’t control my tears. He stepped up to me and held my arms tightly.
‘You need him?! Do you need him like you need me? Tell me, do you need him like you need me?!’ He shook me strongly and let go. He turned away and placed his hands on his waist still raging in anger.
‘Yuvan, no-no you can’t – you can’t make me choose.’ I said stuttering unable to speak properly from crying.
‘Yes I can. You HAVE to choose, it’s either me or him. There is no way you can be with him and expect to still be friends with me. No way. You have to choose! If you’re willing to throw away over 20 years of friendship then that’s your choice!’ He said angrily while pacing around the room.
‘Yuvan, please.’ I pleaded. I held his arm, crying. He moved his arm away.
‘Go. Just go, I can’t deal with this right now. Just go!!’ He shouted without looking at me.
I left the house. I have never seen Yuvan so angry before, I knew this would ruin him. It felt like my whole world was crashing down around me. Yuvan has been with me through everything since I was a child. I can’t lose him. I was in such a dilemma. I didn’t know what to do. How am I supposed to choose?? I sat outside Yuvans house gathering my thoughts and reliving Yuvans furious reaction in my mind. I wanted things to be better, for things to go back to how it was.
I need to see Sayyam. I need to talk to him about what happened. I looked for him at the outhouse to find him not there. Where could he be at this time of day? There was only one place that he could be.
I walked to the beach to find Sayyam sat at the area of the beach where we would sit together. I sat near him. He looked at me. His eyes were bloodshot, as if he had been crying. He turned away and looked ahead at the water. The rough waters symbolising stormy times are upon us.
We sat for a while in silence, both still trying to digest what had happened.
‘Sayyam.’ I said softly.
‘It’s over, isn’t it?’ He said in a dejected tone, he wouldn’t look at me.
‘It has to be.’ I said with tears flowing down my face. He didn’t respond. He sat there with no expression. I knew he was hurting, but he didn’t want to show it. Seeing him like this hurt me too.
‘Sayyam?’
‘Just go Krishna. Please…I need to be on my own.’ He said quietly.
I got up and walked home.
I was hurting. I was hurting so much. I was forced to choose between my love and my best friend. I had to sacrifice my love for Sayyam for Yuvans happiness. I couldn’t lose him. I just wanted things to be better and back to the way it was.
It was the next day. I woke up thinking about what happened last night. I was so confused and upset. Did I do the right thing? So many questions were going round in my head, I felt like I was losing my mind. I spent the whole morning in bed, I didn’t want to get up and face the world. I felt depressed, the two people I care about so much were hurting and it’s all my fault. Why did I let myself get into this situation?
It was late afternoon, Ma came into my room and opened the curtains. I covered my eyes as the light pierced though the window.
‘Krishna, you have to get up now, you can’t stay in bed all day. We have been invited to Suhani’s house.’
My heart sank. Suhani Aunty’s house is the one place I was afraid to go to.
I got ready and went downstairs.
‘Krishna, you go first. I’ve got a few things to do before I go. I won’t be long, I will meet you there.’ Ma said.
I made my way to Suhani Aunty’s house. I heard shouting as I walked through the front garden. I followed the voices and it led to the outhouse.
I was shocked at what I saw.
Yuvan and Sayyam were fighting. Sayyam was on the ground with Yuvan sat over him punching him. I ran over and grabbed hold of Yuvan to pull him away from Sayyam.
‘Yuvan, stop!! Yuvan, get off him!’ I shouted. I kept screaming at the top of my lungs for him to stop. It was like he was possessed, I had never seen Yuvan so violent, he couldn’t hear me. Once he realised, he got up and looked at me. I was stunned. I have never seen so much anger in Yuvan’s face before. He was out of control. He looked at me and stormed towards the house.
Sayyam was still laying on the ground in pain. I rushed over to him and kneeled on the floor. I held him arm to help him up. He moved his arm away.
‘I don’t need your help Krishna.’ He said sternly. He slowly got up. I wanted to help him. I could see him struggling, he slowly limped into the outhouse. I looked at Yuvan walking to the house. I ran upto him and grabbed his arm.
‘Yuvan, how could you do that?! What happened? Why were you fighting with Sayyam?!’ I said furiously.
‘You know why Krishna!! He betrayed me!’ He said angrily and started to walk away.
‘Yuvan, stop. I just want things to go back to the way it was…I’ve ended things with Sayyam. Please don’t hurt him anymore.’ I couldn’t control my tears.
The close friendship has been ruined between two best friends and it’s all my fault. It’s my responsibility to fix things.
‘Really?’ Yuvan held my arms, relieved by what he had heard. He hugged me and left to go back to the house.
I felt relieved that I had my best friend back but it was at Sayyams expense. I wanted to see him. I needed to see if he’s ok. I wiped my tears and went over to the outhouse.
I stood at the front entrance to see Sayyam standing topless, facing the mirror, trying to apply ointment to the wounds on his back. He was struggling to reach them.
I went up to him and touched his hand to stop him from struggling. He turned round and looked at me.
‘Krishna, I don’t need y-‘ I placed my finger on his lips to stop him from talking. I stepped closer to him and looked deep into his eyes. I could see the pain in his eyes. I lightly skimmed over the bruises on his face with my fingers, each time a tiny piece of my heart would break seeing him hurt. I took the ointment from his hand. I gently touched the grazes on his smooth muscular body, all the way from his chest down his torso.
He lifted his hand towards my face. I held his hand to stop him, our eyes were locked on one another’s. I placed my hands on his arms and turned him to face the mirror. I gently applied ointment to the wounds on his back, I could hear him wincing every time my fingers would brush against his wounds. It was hurting me more and more, I couldn’t take it anymore. I flung my arms around his body and I hugged him tight. I gently kissed a wound on his back and cried uncontrollably. I couldn’t hold back anymore.
He looked over his shoulder and slowly turned around to face me. I faced down, I couldn’t look at him. He placed his finger on my chin. He lifted my chin so that my face was facing his. He leaned closer to me and placed his hands on my cheeks. Tears slowly flowed down my face. He gently brushed his lips against my cheeks soaking up each tear. The tingling sensation appeared again after what seems like a lifetime ago.
Why does he do this to me? Why does he make me lose control?
He stopped once he had soaked up all my tears. He leaned his forehead on mine, put his hands around my waist and slowly pushed me against the wall. I could feel his heartbeat increasing. He started kissing me down my neck and my shoulders. He kissed the other side of my neck until his face was in front of mine. I held onto him as I closed my eyes relishing his every touch.
Our lips were so close together, our hearts racing, trying to avoid temptation. I couldn’t fight these feelings any longer, I closed my eyes and moved my lips close to his, wanting to be taken in by him.
Suddenly, I felt him move away. I opened my eyes. He was stood in front of me trying to avoid eye contact.
‘Krishna, you need to go.’ He said struggling to speak.
My heart sank. I snapped back into reality. Visions of Yuvans reaction came flooding back. My heart started beating fast. I realised what just nearly happened.
‘I-I’m sorry.’ I stuttered taking a few steps back. My heart started racing even faster, I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I ran out of the outhouse crying even more. The feelings I have for Sayyam were spiralling out of control. When I am with him, I can’t stop myself. Sayyam is my weakness.
I stood in front of the entrance of Birla House. I wiped my tears and took a deep breath to compose myself. I walked into the house.
What happened next I didn’t expect. I was in for a big shock…
Precap- The Aftermath of Yuvan finding out- Sayyams POV.
Hi everyone
I hope you enjoyed this chapter. There’s lots of drama happening now that Yuvan has found out. It’s a rollercoaster of emotions in this chapter and the chapters ahead.
Let me know your thoughts!
Thank you to you all for supporting my FF so far.
Thanks
Shaz x