“I want to talk to you” I said as soon as he entered the room. “What are you doing here?” asked he shocked. “I’m in no mood to tell you all that” said I as I did not wanted him to divert the topic again. “And I have no mood to talk to you” said he and started loosening his tie. I held him by his shoulder and turned furiously. “Don’t you show me this carefree attitude” I said and he jerked my hand and said “My attitude. You have problem not me so just leave” he said and turned again. My tears did not take a moment to flow. I saw his face expression change through mirror looking at me. “Why are you doing this Parth” I said with pain filled voice. I saw him gulping as if he was trying to control his emotions from flowing and it pained me. “I said na I don’t want to talk” he said but I sensed his eyes they were struggling to hide his emotions. “Fine” I said as I stormed out of his room. I don’t know why I felt It wasn’t his fault whatever happened that day.
I always wanted his explanation but first my dad then his stubbornness did not let me discover the truth of that day. Other than him nobody could give me the answer and he was so stubborn that he wasn’t even ready to talk about it. I am feeling so helpless. “Men are very bad at expressing beta you have to sense their emotions” I remembered my mom’s words during her last few days when she was searching a match for me. I’m trying hard to decipher what are his emotions and he is not letting me to do. I was not finding ways.
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“Dad wo I need your help” I said as I stood in my dad’s room door. He turned and looked at me and my eyes stared ground.
“Are you sure this will work?” I asked him and he placed his hand around my neck and said “All girls love shopping. If you want to cool her this is the best way” I looked at him blank. Yup she was angry on me. And this time I was not able to cool her even with my hugs and surprise kisses.
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“I’m sorry sorry sorry” I said standing in front of her. “Why did you come so early. You should have come after my death due to hunger….” and before she could say further I don’t know from where the lava inside me busted and my hands touched her cheek. I held her shoulders and dragged her close. Her eyes were filled with tears and as I looked at her cheek it was slowly turning pink. Ahhh my stupid anger. I don’t know what happened to me when she spoke about death. “Parth” I heard my dad screaming and probably he witnessed my actions. She burst out crying like a small kid and my anger cooled down. And I looked at her worried. “I’m….” before I could complete dad released her from my hold and took her from there. I pulled my hair frustrated and feeling disgusted about myself for my outburst.
As I looked in their direction I saw her fainting before she reached the terrace door. “Ragu… Ragu…..” my dad patted her cheek. But she was lifeless. My heart felt a fear rushing in my spine. I rushed to him immediately and lifted her and headed to our room. I kept looking at her face which was filled with tears. It pained me it pained like some one is squeezing my heart. “Ragini… Ragini…” I patted her cheek after I placed her on the bed. “She is fasting for your health and well being. You did not had courtesy to come early at least why did you behave so badly with her” my dad screamed at me. Then only I realized that she has not eaten from early morning and it was for me. And I like a fool behaved so badly with her.
“She just fainted due to weakness. She will be alright by morning” said the doctor after he injected her and was ready to leave. Dad accompanied him. I sat beside her holding her hand. “I’m sorry Ragini. I always hurt you always. I’m sorry” I rested my forehead on her hand.
I sensed her hand moving as the sun rose and it’s rays filled our room. I got up from the place where I was sitting from last night. I looked at her and she slowly opened her eyes. She struggled to sit and I helped her to sit. She jerked my hands after she sat. “Ragini” I said and she showed her palm to stop me. “Whatever happened yesterday wasn’t enough? Mistake was mine only I shouldn’t have kept fast for you. I’m sorry” said she and slept turning other side. “Listen to me once” I said but she did not turn. And I headed out sad. It is true that I don’t think before doing anything when I’m angry. I did mistake by hurting her. And I deserved it.
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It had been a week that she did not even see my face. And it was hurting me. So as I was left with no option I came to my dad for help. And I decided as per his suggestion. He was angry with me for hurting his most favorite person in the world. I have never seen him attached to someone after mom left. She had become is partner in his pranks than daughter in law. And I loved it how she was making her place in our life. And she was healing our loneliness. And we both couldn’t live without her. Now I have to cool her at any cost. I had been practicing to propose her from a month and on Karvachauth I actually gathered all my courage to convey my feelings but due to my stupid anger I lost a golden chance. Now I have to cool her and I will propose her on her birthday which was just two weeks away.
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“You think I will listen to you” she said when I told her to be ready in the evening for shopping. “Do you have any choice Mrs Kapoor?” I asked her smirking. “Such shameless you are. First you hurt me so badly and instead of being sorry you are threatening me” said she. “Your brain. Think whatever you want to think. Be ready at 6” I said and headed out of my room. “Khadus” I heard her murmuring and I smiled caressing my neck. Her naming was so funny and I loved whatever she called me. Though she was scolding me I was ready to listen just to listen to her voice. I loved irritating her to just see her anger I mean she looked so cute with her flared up nose and angry pout. I always wondered why she never used to resist me from kissing her . Somewhere I felt she was feeling the same for me. I wanted her in my life forever. And I wanted to make her my wife with all my love and will.
“Select fast yar how much time you take?” asked she as her palm slipped which was resting her chin when I was selecting my blazer. I really can’t believe she hated shopping so much really she wasn’t like all the typical girls and I cursed my dad for giving me the stupid idea.
“Ohho Ragi. Is that the way to eat ice cream” I said when I saw her licking her hand which was covered with melting ice cream. She looked at me and twisted her lips. She continued eating it same way without giving any heed to my words. Has she listened to me ever that she will listen now. I nodded my head and followed her. “Anything else?” I asked her when she wiped her ice cream filled lips and hands with the tissue. She just nodded her head. “Ragini” I heard someone calling her name from behind me. She bent her head to look at the owner of the voice and when she discovered I saw her eyes widening with shock. “Preethu” screeched she like a small kid and ran passing me and hugged someone. I turned and looked in that direction. It was him. Preetham Singh. Her childhood best friend. More precisely her first crush. I sensed my body stiffening and my fist tightening. Why he has to come back in her life again. I felt her going away from me. I smiled at him weakly when she walked to me with him. Finally she realized that she has a husband also. She was still holding his hand. She never even let’s me hold her hand. Then I realized it was my responsibility to hold her hand which I never did I have just dragged her to me forcefully. They kept talking and remembering their school life and I just walked behind them. She completely forgot me like I’m invisible. I felt like punching that idiot. How can he behave with her like that even after knowing she is my wife. Such a jerk he was.
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“You know he used to roam behind me till I forgive him. It was fun torturing him” she said waving her hands in air out of my grip when we were sleeping and I was hugging her from back. From the time we returned home she has been talking about him and only him. And it irked me. I folded her hands again. “Enough Ragi sleep now” I said annoyed fed up of Preethu puran. “You never let me speak only” she said pouting. I kissed her cheek and she opened her mouth shocked. “Why was this for?” asked she. “Simply” I said and dragged her close to me. I saw her cheeks turning pink and blush covering her face. I just loved her more and more for this. Even if I did not speak she used to understand me. I never needed to express my feelings for her. I buried my face in her hair and dozed off. I needed her like a teddy bear always beside me because without hugging her I never used to get sleep.
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I was at the terrace to dry the clothes. Just one month was remaining for our next hearing. I was lost thinking how these six months passed. I did not realize I was near the edge of the terrace. As I walked further I felt I will fall but a strong hand held me and dragged me and in next moment I was in his embrace. He held me as he is holding his breath. “What is wrong with you can’t you be careful?” he asked me as I was still in his embrace. “Sorry I was just…..” he stopped me. “Shhh. Please can I hug you for two minutes” said he and I just nodded my head and he dragged me more close to him. I wasn’t understanding his behavior. But I could sense his pain. Pain to lose me within seconds. Was this the reason for him to withdraw himself? He took a deep breath and left me and started walking. I was confused. I walked behind him.
“Please Parth I want to talk to you just tell me once what happened that day?” I asked him cupping his face. He jerked my hands and walked and I held his wrist to stop him. “You never gave me a chance to explain. Now why?” I heard his cracking voice. I turned him and hugged him encircling my hands around his stomach and placed my head on his chest. “Leave me Ragini” said he trying to get out of my hold. “Why should I?” asked I not able to control my emotions. “Because I don’t deserve you” said he trying to get out of my hold. “I love you” I said as I had no option to stop him. He stopped his struggle and I dragged him close to me. “I want to be with you forever” I said as tears rolled down my cheeks. His hands started moving to cover me in his embrace. But he stopped with a jerk. He dragged me away forcefully and headed to his room. His eyes were watery. I felt him leaning to the door and crying silently. Why is he doing this all. Why is he denying his feelings for me. Am I less stubborn. I will not let this divorce happen not now when I know that he loves me.
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Next shot is the last shot. I will update it by the end of this week.