Mera Dil Aap Ke Lie Dhadaktha Hai – (suhani si ek ladki- yuvAni)- episode 4 (MEGA LONG EPISODE)

Hey guys, sooooooo sorry for keeping you waiting for this long. School has made me too busy! But this epi is suuuuppppeeer long to make up for it. I will only update this ff for a while till this one ends. Then i will carry on with my other one. I will cary on writing regardless of where the stupid writers take the story, because YuvAni will always be amazing. Please comment because this epi took A LOT of effort.

Last epi- episode-3

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Yuvaan skips frivolously in to the room where Yuvraj and Suhani were and a slow Yuvaani in a bad mood followed at his foot steps. When both the children arrived at the doorway…

Yuvraj and Suhani sprang apart at the speed of lightning and suhani hastily hid her face, wiping away the left over yearning tears. Yuvraj looked at her with miserable longing eyes. His chest felt tight and constricted, an unfillable gaping void under his shaking arm where Suhani had cacooned in to his side, spilling her pained tears and emotions, just moments ago. The silky strands of her hair that had just been coiling around his fingers just slipped out of reach. But both the parents who had filled the regretful agonizing gap in their hearts for each other with love for their kids, plastered false brave smiles on their faces. They would do anything so that their’s children’s life and futures weren’t tainted, and so that their youthful tinkling eyes didn’t fall apart in to stained memories.

Yuvaan started giggling loudly at the vividly colourful plaster sSuhanick to Suhani’s head, making Yuvraj and Suhani smile heartfelt grins as they treasured a mental capture of their son’s pure laughter.

Yuvaan- Mumma that tom and jerry plaster on your head makes you look stupid! (Yuvaan tried to speak through his incontrollable laughter but Yuvani just looked to the ground dejectedly, twiddling her thumbs.)

Yuvraj quickly noticed that this comment may offend an already ailed Suhani or bring up other bitter memories that stung like a fresh wound.

Yuvraj- Yuvaan, its not funny. Dont laugh at your mumma. (His voice wasnt loud or scary but it was still a little stern. Yuvaan turned quiet, a little usual nervousness in her mischevious eyes.)

Suhani frowned adorably and childishly and reached over and pinched Yuvaan’s ear playfully.

Suhani- Haan Yuvaan, you meanie… (She then turned to face Yuvraj.) Tumare papa teek kehrehi he…
Yuvraj was faced with Suhani’s silly plaster, her big cute eyes very puffy with old tears and her lovable button nose had tinged a clown red and he couldn’t controll his bout of loud laughter. Suhani jumpedwith surprise, openmouthed,at his sudden change of behaviour and Yuvaan smiled cheekily.

Yuvraj lifted Yuvaan of the floor and playfully dumped Yuvaan into his lap with a fatherly affectionate smile. Yuvraj leaned down to Yuvaan’s ear,which faced away from him, while they both faced Suhani, whose face had warped in confusion .

Yuvraj- I’m sorry Yuvaan, you were too right… Your mumma is impossible not to laugh at… (Yuvraj whispered this purposely loud so Suhani and Yuvani could both hear,for comedic purposes.)

Suhani humphed endearingly,a cute playful light shining in her deep eyes.

Suhani- Fine.You father-son team Suhanirn on me… I dont care!(Suhani’s voice was mischeviously indignant.)I still havemy dearest Yuvani on my side,dont I?

Yuvani still didn’t avert her melancholy gaze from the dusty unvacumed floor.

Yuvraj- Yuvani? (His body tensed up in parental concern. Yuvani walked slowly closer to the other three, still not looking upwards to meet their piercing gazes.) What’s wrong?

Yuvani started whimpering shakily, her childish worries and woes building up as big crocodile tears at the ducts of her eyes.

Suhani sank to the floor,kneeling to Yuvani’s level to appear more comforting and approachable. Suhani’s forehead crinkled with worry she shouldn’t have to face.She wrapped her consoling arms around Yuvani,wanting to badly be there for her after regretting being absent for a hefty precious part of Yuvani’s life. Her eyes watering slightly.

Yuvraj whispered in to Yuvaan’s ear gently and explanitively, trying to stop his voice wavering with emotion. Yuvaan who had matured early because of his good upbringing, left the room understandingly, a genuine worry for his sister settling over his eyes.

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Sambhav stops Yuvaan at the living room door, smiling a creepy smile with shifty eyes. He slowly crouches to Yuvaan’s level,pain stakingly slow, thriving off the way Yuvaan shook and squirmed with fear. Yuvaan breathed heavily, the feeling of danger settling over as unshed tears over his eyes.

Sambhav- Chaaamp… (his voice was sickly sweet and it was the type of tone that crawled under your skin.) You want your mumma to be happy don’t you?

Yuvaan nodded meekly, his body tremoring. Sambhav stroked his chin with a veracious grin, Yuvaan kept hearing Sambhav’s last sentence circling round and round his terrified mind. As Yuvaan shut his eyes as a method of trying calm himself a bout of rage and brave protectiveness skimmed over him.

Yuvaan- Are you going to hurt mumma? (His small angry eyes had the same love for Suhani behind them as Yuvraj in a slightly weaker form.) Im not going to let you hurt mumma! (The little boy was attempting to cry for help with undertones of immense rage but Sambhav places his metaphorically blood-stained hand over his mouth, rendering him silent.)

Sambhav- That Yuvraj papa you spend all day praising left your mumma Yuvaan… and however sweet he seems, he isn’t coming back. (Sambhav’s voice was a condescending whisper, and he caused Yuvaan to step back, aghast and hurt.)

Sambhav- And you know how you were going to tell your dear mumma and papa how you heard that i was paying someone for a kidnapping… (Sambhav spat the words out, a dangerous fire of fury running through his veins. Yuvaan’s mouth was parted slightly, but he stayed silent finding no words safe to say.)

Sambhav- Ifyou did that… I would leave too… Then your mumma will be all alone… (Yuvaan squeezed his eyes shut, as if he could make everything dissapear when he opens his eyes. He mustered some courage, trying to hold some ground for his mother.)

Yuvaan- Its better if she is alone then if she is with a filthy uncle like you… (His voice shook but he tried to keep controll of it, Sambhav almost growled with fury but then swallowed it back to finish his work.)

Sambhav- Do you remember when you used to wake up in the night and accidently see your mumma cry herself to sleep? You want to push her back to that state again Yuvaan? (Yuvaan’s mouth fell slack, hit with scarring memories.)
..Yuvaan’s Flashback..
Yuvaan wakes up at the loud whimper seeping through the walls but it was obvious that the whimpers were trying to be silenced but escaped through the intensely tortured soul that they left from. Yuvaan’s big eyes were tired and glassy, they had a extreme sadness buried somewhere deep within them, but there was a sense of bravery that had slowly built in his bones from facing this almost every night. He slowly lifted himself out of bed, pulling the duvet over the area where his body was curled in safely a few moments ago. Now as he made his way to console his mother who he hated seeing weak, he was out of the blanket that protected him and was vunreable to the biting wind of pain.

Yuvaan stood at doorway to Suhani’s room, the walls of innocence around his mind were breaking with every screeching sob that wrenched from Suhani’s aching heart. Tears spilled from his big sad eyes but he swallowed them back trying to keep silent.

Suhani shook with huge tremoring wails of agony, clutching a photo of her and Yuvraj embracing each other against her racing heart. Memories surrounded her from all sides, sufforcating her bare soul. She envisioned Yuvraj’s comforting arms enveloping her while she cried in to his shirt. His manly scent keeping her worries at bay.

Suhani- I left… i know i did Yuvraj… But why haven’t you come to find me? Am i that easy to forget? Was the love in your heart for me feigned or forced? (her voice was a quiet broken whisper. Like she had lost her will.) I lost my everything, and there was no one beside me to help me pick up the pieces. You betrayed me when i needed you the most, even when you promised to forever hold my hand. (Now her abrupt and forcefully quiet screeching screams of pure agony, ran like shock waves through her body.) You stole my right to say your name when my son asks me who his father is. I hate this. (She punched her bed roughly in frustration.) I hate that i cant stop loving you. (She held her weeping head in her hand, clamping her tired eyes shut.) I love you Yuvraj… I need you. Come back…

Yuvaan sat against the wall, shielding his ears with his arms and squeezing his scared eyes shut. The helpess desperate whisper of ‘Yuvraj…’ haunted his mind. But Yuvaan wiped his tears and tried to place a smile on his face to disguise that he had seen all this.

Yuvaan- Mumma are you awake? (He added a tone of inncocent questioning, trying to sound obvilous.)

Suhani hushed with astonishment, hastily wiping away the remaints of her spilt tears. She swallowed back her breaking voice and tried to seem as normal as she could be.

Suhani- Yes Yuvaan beta, Im awake. (She sniffles back her shaking voice and undertones of sudden motherly concern. And a pretending Yuvaan who had wiped away his tears tip toed slightly in to the room.) But why are you awake? Did you have a nightmare?

Yuvaan shook his head no, and he was telling the truth. He hadn’t seen a nightmare, he’d seen something much worse, he’d seen a terrifying reality.

Suhani wiped away the beads of sweat that tickled her hairline, trying to maintain her composure and normal demeanour, not knowing Yuvaan had already seen her other pained side, many times.

He walked over and sat on the bed, his adorable youthful eyes runny with worry for his mother.

Yuvaan- Are you okay mumma? (He gently traced and caressed her face with his small stubly fingers. Suhani shut her eyes in to his touch, imagining Yuvraj’s comforting hand in its place.)

She opened her eyes, hit with a reality check. She smiled at Yuvaan pretending to be nonchalant, but her eyes were hazed with pain.

Suhani- Of course Im fine. Why wouldnt I be?

Yuvaan- I love you Mumma… (His juvenile voice was raw and filled with emotion and it made Suhani’s heart skip a beat.)

He leaned to her forehead and planted a sweet kiss. Suhani almost collapsed at the overpowering amount of memories and feelings hitting her like a tonne of bricks.

A bleeding tear left her anguished eye and rolled down her face and she yearningly remembered everytime Yuvraj’s tender lips planted a love filled affectionate kiss on the exact spot.

Suhani- I love you too Yuvaan. So much…

Her voice was quiet and sounded far away. She couldnt controll the tears that continued to leave her eye as she looked at Yuvaan. She stared with motherly affection in to his doe brown eyes that painfully resembled Yuvraj’s insanely unforgettable ones.

..end of flashback..

Yuvaan had shed a childish tear that he wiped away with the back of his hand. He cleared out his throat and refused himself to cry again.

Yuvaan- Okay. I wont tell anybody. Please. Dont hurt my mumma or leave her alone…

Sambhav’s smile stretched to the sky, warping his face creepily. He ruffled Yuvaan’s hair, the kindness in his smile too good to be true.

Sambhav- Good boy… Now you can go… (He let go of Yuvaan’s shoulders that he had tightly gripped on to, leaving white handprints behind.)

Yuvaan almost sprinted away, leaving a grinning Sambhav behind. He almost felt sorry for Yuvaan, the poor kid was so naive and scared and would anything for his mother. But he didnt know that he had just ruined his own mumma’s life.

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Yuvraj looked down at Suhani and Yuvani’s embrace with a pounding heart. Yuvani’s tears had always caused him immense pain, as Yuvani was his only fragment left of Suhani
So he always tried to keep her perfect and unharmed like a polished pearl that he treasured.

But his pain was doubled today. Because whenever he saw tears in Yuvani’s eyes through those 6 years… He would imagine Suhani consoling her in a motherly embrace and sharing some of Yuvani’s pain as her own watery eyes, in her usual selfless way. And now when it was coming to life in front of his eyes he realised he couldnt handle it, he couldnt bear seeing Suhani and Yuvani both suffering.

..Suhani POV..

Suhani- What is it Yuvani beta? Mumma ko bula do…

Yuvani cried bitterly in to my shoulder and shook her head no in childish stubborness. I used my finger to lift Yuvani’s now red face to turn to me. I used my other shaking hand to wipe away Yuvani’s tears and tried to smile reassuringly even though my heart was threatening to topple over.

Suhani- roh na math… tell me Yuvani, and ill fix it for you… (I looked down at Yuvani but the sense of nauseating worry blurred my vison.)

Yuvani- i dont have an asli mumma. (It felt like i had just stopped in time, like the entire world was bustling past me but i couldnt move. And i could see from the aching way Yuvraj was clenching his jaw, the same shock and torment rotted his bones.) Yuvaan has you, and now he has Sambhav uncle. But me? I dont have a mumma…

Suhani- Yuvani… ( my voice was a broken whisper. I was helpless, i was trying to explain to my daughter that i wasnt a bad mother at heart when i had abandoned her for the first 6 years of her life.) That isnt true… Im still your mu- (Yuvani pushed me roughly, and i couldnt stop the gasp that left my shaking lips. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Yuvraj stirring from his frozen sit.

Yuvani- This is your fault! You married Sambhav uncle, you didnt marry Papa! (Her scream rattled the walls of the house and rattled straight to the centre of my shock still core.)

Yuvraj- Yuvani! Is that how you talk to your mumma!? Apoligise! Immediately! (Yuvraj’s eyes were filling with tears of torment while he tried to keep his voice strict.)

I wanted to thank him for supporting me but the atmosphere was to sufforcating to think. Yuvani’s word were like a blow to the face, like a tug on my heart. The stinging words raced around my mind. Eventhough I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to ward away the terrifying thoughts, I couldn’t ignore the hatred for me in Yuvani’s eyes, and it crushed my soul.

Yuvani- Nai Pappa! Its all her fault! If she had married you we could have all been a family. You stole my family away from me!

Suddenly i wasnt there. My heart was detached from my body and my brain detached from my soul. I couldnt controll the way my mind cursed Yuvraj, he made my own daughter hate me. It wrung my heart between life’s hands over and over, not giving me time to breathe. It felt like when those words left Yuvani’s mouth that i’d mostly died inside.

..end of POV..

Yuvraj grabbed Yuvani’s wrist quite roughly and tugged her toward him, with infuriated puffy eyes.

Yuvraj- Yuvani! Did i teach you to say such things? ( He felt as if he was trapped in a hell on earth. He could bear with a lot but hearing such words about Suhani was not one of them.) Your mumma would never harm anybody, hurting you is impossible… (his eyes had warmed at its core like it did whenever he talked about Suhani.)

Yuvani- She’s mean and selfish. (Chains of pain stopped Suhani from saying a word. She sat and stared blankly at Yuvani, constant tears spilling from her eyes.) She ruined everything. I hate her!

Yuvraj- YUVANI! DONT YOU DARE SAY SUCH THINGS… (Yuvani’s eyes Turned big and round in aghast at Z’s loud yelling voice. Suhani also jumped in sudden suprise.)

Suhani, who had incestently falling silent tears down her face and a quivering body, placed her hand on Yuvraj’s shoulder. When she did this he instantly relaxed his tensed body and the rage brewing in him mind calmed. When Suhani’s hand rested on his broad shoulders and her weeping face shook no, Yuvraj suddenly came back to reality. He had a burning resentment of himself that he actually thought of raising his voice in front of his daughter, but his infatuation for Suhani made him crazy.

Yuvraj – Look Yuvani… (His voice was now a broken whisper melting in to the silence.) Its not your mumma’s fault. Its my fault. Please. Dont blame her. Its my fault. ( He tried to conceal the small whimpers that left his trembling lips.)

Suhani’s heart literally imploded in the agony of hearing a tattered Yuvraj start to weep but somewhere in her now cynical mind, there was a slither of animonisty toward Yuvraj, he left her at their wedding… He made her hopeful, to then just make her world come crashing down again. Yuvani heard the pain in her father’s voice and broke out of her childish frustration and sadness. She moved closer to Yuvraj and hugged him tightly, trying to give him any comforting she could offer.

Yuvani- Why are you upset Papa? I wont be sad anymore… please dont cry… ( Yuvraj clinged on to Yuvani as if she was his nectar of life, with his eyes shut and finger stroking her braided hair.)

Yuvraj- Im fine now. You go and play. Please Yuvani. Remember. Never ever talk to your mother like that, please, for my sake. (Yuvani nodded maturely, and walked silently out the room. Sadness still present on her face.)

Yuvraj rocked back and forth repeatedly with a quivering body, his eyes tightly shut and lips mumbling. As he curled his knees in to his body, he carried on chanting ‘its my fault. Its my fault.’ Tears rolled down face and then to his arm, and he didnt wipe them. He whimpered loudly and desperately. With a vunreable position that resembled a child.

Suhani couldnt bear with his pain, she couldnt stand seeing him so broken. Eventhough she still didnt understand why he left her. Her heart didnt let her stop loving him. She almost shut her eyes to stop seeing him in such a state. But as his wails got louder and more heart wrenching…

Suhani inched closer to him on the bed longingly and painfully staring at him. She slowly wrapped her arm around his back, carresing his childishly curled in body. Yuvraj automatically leaning in to her consoling touch, resting his head his shaking head against her shoulder, releasing tears on to fabric of her salwar. She closes her heavy eyes and rests her lips on top of Yuvraj’s head, as if she was planting a kiss there. Her tears showering his scalp. She rubbed his back comfortingly, trying to quieten down his weeps.

Suhani- Shush… please yuvi baby shush… (Suhani freezed for second reliving her saying the word baby in her mind, but Yuvraj didnt even seem to notice and just relished in her relaxing arms. )

Suhani- come on now.. shhh… tell me how will we cheer up Yuvani? ( she tried to talk normally to distract him from his cries.)

Yuvraj -It wasnt my fault… it wasnt my… (Suhani carried on whispering sweet nothings and ‘okay, okay.’ in to his ear as she stroked his back.) Please Suhani listen to me… i was kidna- (Yuvraj’s movements were hectic and almost phsycotic and it physically pained Suhani to watch him, so…)

Suhani suddenly took Yuvraj’s face in to her hands, cutting of his words of truth unintentionally. She cradled his face gently as she stared deeply and reasuuringly in to his eyes, stopping his trail of words as his eyes closed in to her magical touch.

Suhani- Its okay… Don’t worry…

Yuvraj- Suhani, trust me, I didn’t do any- (Suhani placed her finger on his lips, halting his words.)

Suhani- listen to me…. it okay yuvi… its okay… (She searched his eyes intensley, while stroking his cheek.)

He completely forgot wha he was saying, mesmerized by the stunning eyes of the love of his life.

Suhani- So tell me… What will we do to cheer Yuvani up?

Yuvraj wiped his tears and moved out of Suhani’s arms painfully slowly. He plastered a chivelerous smile on his face, but it was faint faltering and pained.
Yuvraj- I know… (He smiled mischeviously and Suhani grinned back but they both still had sad aching eyes.)
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The hustle and bustle of the streets of Allahbad surrounded them, the jostle of friendly neighbours, the noise of honking horns and smell of the traditional food wafting through the air. The entire atmosphere was calming and free-spirited and set all four of their hearts at rest, finally, even if it was only for a while, everything miserable was forgotten.

Yuvraj has hoisted Yuvaan on to his shoulders and rocked him playfully as they walked down the street. Yuvani and Suhani strolled light heartedly beside them with vividly bright grins. The entire family were playing a gorgeous melody of their tinkling laughter ringing in the air.

Yuvani- Papa lift me up too… ( she made big cute pleading eyes.)

Yuvraj – No. You arent awesome enough… (Yuvraj looked down at her with a mischevious smile.)

Yuvani- Papa!! Pretty pleeaase. ( she frowned slightly, but knew it was all a joke.)

Yuvraj- Are you a champion at basketball like Yuvaan here? No, right? ( Yuvraj tutted comically with a laugh.)

Suhani- So? I dont play basketball, hum abhee be katarnak hai… ( Suhani smirked determinely.)

Yuvraj- haan. Suhani tho bhoat katarnak hai… so if you are so awesome then you lift her… (he huffed with the annoyance he used to show during their old nok-jhok.)

Suhani- Yuvi! Please dont make me lift her! I am a weakling… (she pouted adorably and fluttered her eyelashes,making Yuvraj’s heart tingle.)

Yuvraj-WEAKLING?! (He burst in to ironic laughter while Suhani frowned cutely.) Oh wait i forgot, all of this is fat not muscle! (He reached over and pinched her stomach.)
His fingertips tickled against her sensitive skin and she squirmed and giggled endearingly, Yuvraj’s heart warming. The kids laughed endlessly, loving to see their parents like this.

Suhani turned around with a childish frown and an adamant stomp of the feet.

Suhani-bacho, uss sadu ko bulao do ki hum usse bhaat nei karahi hai! (She stood facing away from them with her arms over her chest and a playful frown on her face.)

Yuvani- papa… mumma says… uss sadu ko bulao do k-

Yuvraj- i get it, i get it… mumma ka chamcha (he sighs comically while Suhani and Yuvaan giggle, and then Yuvraj places Yuvaan on the floor.)

He walks over to Suhani and stands behind her with a slight smile. He grabs her shoulder and Turns her around, making her gasp in suprise. The air from her gasp tickled across his skin, making his smile widen. He started looping his arms around her waist, making her tense in anticipation. But he was then hit with images of Suhani and Sambhav together and his hands fell limply at his side, syncronizing with the shattering of his heart. But he didnt let his smile fall and roped his arms loosely around her neck, not wanting to lose the moment. His heart revelled in the way Suhani looked up at him with intensely loving eyes, so much love that it physically hurt.

Yuvraj- Araaey baba… (he pokes her nose lovingly with a sweet smile.) I was just joking, na? Sorry? (He made the big cute puppy dog eyes that she couldnt refuse.)

She sighed with a smile and let her frown drop.

Suhani- then tell me… where are we going?

Yuvraj- (he smiles mischeviously, shaking his pointed index finger as if he was a parent or teacher.) That i wont tell you… come on kids, walk fast…
(He lifted Yuvaan back on to his shoulders.)

Suhani sighed at his answer and started lifting Yuvani up, Yuvraj sees this and worry and consideration fills his eyes.

He places a gentle hand on hers, stopping her after seeing her strain. She looked up at him in confusion and he shook his head slightly.

Yuvraj- dont lift her, you will hurt yourself. Champ can you walk for a bit? (Yuvaan nodded with a smile and maturely got off Yuvraj’s shoulders.) Come Yuvani, i will lift you. Dont bother your mumma… (he lifts the light Yuvani on to his shoulders with ease.)

Yuvani- But you said mumma has to do it herself? (Yuvani smiled slightly cheekily.) So you do care about mumma….

Suhani looked on with a really shy but sympathetic smile at Yuvraj’s profusely blushed cheeks.

Suhani- Shh Yuvani… (her voice was extremely quiet.)

Yuvraj raised his suprised eyes at Suhani trying to translate what he has wanted to say through his longing eyes. Suhani met his loving gaze.

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They walked through the dusky sunset, the gleaming orange and purple undertones of the late afternoon simpering through.

Suhani had a feeling of regret wallowing in her heart, Sambhav was a good man and she was doing him wrong. But she couldnt let herself stop, even if she could never see Yuvraj again, her heart wouldnt let her not make this day a memory. So she kept quiet and enjoyed the bliss afternoon air, acting as if she couldnt remember anything.

Suhani- Where are we going Yuvi?! (She pouted adorably)

Yuvraj- I said na? Im not telling you! (He grinned cheekily.)

Suhani huffed in playful annoyance. The kids also pestered Yuvraj, asking him where they were going every three seconds.

Yuvraj- its nowhere special. Just calm down.

Then it hit them, like a tornado of cravings. The overpoweringly delicious smell, the way too familiar smell… the smell of gollgappas.

Suhani and Yuvani- GOLLGAPPAS!! (Their smiles were ones of 100 volts, and they were irreplacable in Yuvraj’s eyes.)
Suhani turned to look at Yuvraj with this intense excitement and love in her eyes. In the spur of the moment she wrapped her arms around arms around his neck and pulled herself in to him. She closed her eyes tightly, inhaling his manly scent.

Suhani- Thank you Yuvi!

Yuvraj stood shock still in suprise and the kids had small o’s as their mouths.

She slowly pulls opens her eyes and peers over his shoulder. What she sees… makes her arms fall to her side and mouth slack open slightly as she stumbles back.

Yuvraj- Suhani! (His voice was filled with concern as he reaches over to steady her.) What happened?

Suhani was speechless. It was their bench. It was their park. The one filled in every corner with priceless memories of infinte love. Their bench held a heavy void of emptiness, like it was only meant for them and no one else. Her heart asked for tears to come but her eyes were too tired to cry again. She stood expressionless and Yuvraj turned around while holding her hand realising what had happened. He also was taken aback by emotion, just longing to make her his again. The memories burst like a dam of a river and flooded over them.

..Their flashback..
Yuvraj lazed on the bench, arms spread out and relaxed smile on his face. Suhani was lying down on the rest of the bench, facing the sparse clouds. She was about 8 months pregnant,as seen by the large rounded bump of her stomach. Her head was resting in Yuvraj’s lap, as he gently played with her long hair.
Suhani’s face was cutely scunched up in thought and Yuvraj silently laughed at it.

Yuvraj- Oi! Jhansi ki rani! (He playfully poked her shoulder.) Where are you lost?

Suhani slightly turned her head and smiled at him sweetly, making Yuvraj smile back with love.

Suhani- i was just thinking Yuvraj, what would we call our kids? ( Yuvraj’s smile widened and heart warmed at the thought of holding his children that ran with both his and Suhani’s blood melded together.)

He affectionatley caressed her cheek with a huge smile.

Yuvraj- so say, what do you think?

Suhani- if its a boy…

Yuvraj- yeah?…

Suhani- we will call it Amitabh! ( her sentence ended bouts of childish laughter.)

Yuvraj held his head in playful annoyance.

Yuvraj- Amitabh bacchan this, (his voice was playfully angry , but had a tinge of genuine jealously.) Amitabh bacchan that… its as if you love him and not m- (Suhani turned to face him and propped herself up on her elbows in his lap. And stopped his words by grabbing his face in both her hands.)
Suhani- (she strokes his cheek lovingly while he stared in to her eyes deeply) im joking… we would call him Yuvraj…

Yuvraj- Huh? Why would we do that?

Suhani- Because that is the name of the person i love most in this world. (she traces the outlines of his face with her fingertips while Yuvraj was stunned to silence by the overwhelming love she was giving him.)

He leaned over and rested her forehead against his, closing his eyes and soaking in her love and priceless presence.

Yuvraj- I love you Suhani… (His whisper was soft and quiet, so quiet that only she could hear. And that was special as it felt as if their love was a precious secret, that kept the very soul of them alive.)

Suhani- I love you the most. (She whispered back the assurance of the love that was already obvious. She reached up to his ear, and her lips grew closer and closer to his sensitive skin. Then her soft lips brushed seductively over the top of his ear as she whispered…) But the children wont love you the most… They will love me the most… (She smirked proudly as she pulled away and laid back in his lap.)

Yuvraj- Oh no they wont Miss Suhani, of course they will love me the most… I am handsome and kind and clean. Unlike you… (He smiled jokingly.)

Suhani- Hey, shut up you huge nosed fool! (She laughed as she playfully punched him on the chest.)

Yuvraj- Look you duffer… ill ask them myself…

He leaned down to her stomach and lingered above it.

Yuvraj- Hello bacho, how are you? Are all your mumma’s samsosas making you fat and ill? (His whisper tingled the skin of her stomach. She hit him in the shoulder for his teasing remark.)

Yuvraj- You love me the most dont you bacho? (He gently placed his ear on top of her stomach, pretending to listen in. She squimed at the tickling of the touch and had a huge happy smile on her face.)

Yuvraj- Oh… really? (He pretended to scrunch his face in confusion which suhani laughed at, confused.)

Suhani- What, why are you making that face sadu?

Yuvraj- They said they didn’t me more, they loved you more… (Suhani furrowed her brows in puzzlement.)Because their mother is so brave,honest, loving and beautiful. (Yuvraj locked eyes with her still leaning over her stomach and placing his hand over her tummy. Suhani’s eyes watered slightly with happiness.)

She reached down her body and placed her left hand in his hair stroking it tenderly. She took her other hand and placed it over his hand on her tumm, gripping on to him affectionately.

Suhani- You know… I wouldnt mind if they loved you more either… im not possesive over their love. Im only possesive over one person’s love… (Yuvraj lifted his head away from her stomach and sat upright again, raising his eyebrown in question.)

Yuvraj- And whose love is that? (He smiled slightly, staring at his love.)

Suhani turned to face him, still with her head in his lap. She hugged him around his middle wih one hand and snuggled her head in to the space between his stomach and his hand. His elbow was caressing the back of her head, and she closed her eyes sighing contendedly.

Suhani- Your love.

..End of Flashback..

Yuvraj and suhani smile at each other tragically ironicly with yearning tears blurring their eyes, their fingers were still linked tightly as if it was their lifeline. The weight of old fragile memories glue their eyes and hearts together, Yuvraj’s heart cracks seeing suhani’s lips tremble slightly, he wanted her back. He just longed for the right to hold her, kiss her, tell her he loves her, but he had lost it all.

Yuvani tugged Suhani’s hand, pulling her away from Yuvraj. This brings them both back to reality and they both smile kindly down at their daughter.

Yuvani- Come na mumma! Lets eat! (Yuvani rushes and sits on the stool in front of the stand and Suhani joins her.)

Suhani- Yuvani! You like gollgappas? (Suhani was confused since Yuvani hated greasy food, and it showed in her slight smile.)

Yuvani- haan mumma, every year on the 28th of September (this is Suhani’s birthday for the sake of the ff.) papa would bring me here and me feed me gollgappas… (Yuvani smiled at Suhani unknowingly.)

Suhani smiled widely back at her but she struggled to hold back her emotional tears. She looked up at yuvraj gingerly and Yuvraj held her stare, his own eyes watering.

They both remembered how they would come to the park every year when they were together on her birthday and he would feed her golgappas. She would try to convince him to have some and he would oblidge only because she was fedding him with her hands. And then they would adorably argue about the mess Suhani had made over the table and their clothes. Then Suhani would sweetly convince Yuvraj out of his anger so she would get her gift with a cute kiss. They also remembered the promise they made to return to the park ever year and the fact that Yuvraj fullfilled that promise made Suhani unbelieveably happy.

Yuvani- Come on Mumma! Eat!

Suhani smiled at Yuvani and took a small bite.

Yuvaan- You unhygenic sadus! (He takes out a hand sanitiser from his packet and pours it out on to both Suhani and Yuvani’s hands.) We are outside, be careful of the dirt. (Yuvraj laughed at Yuvaan silently, the tears of memories not stopping hazing his eyes. And Suhani sighs at her son who had aquired the habits of his father and mother.)

Yuvani- okay,okay. Papa you come and eat too….

Suhani- (suhani laughed sarcastically.) Your papa? Eating this? You must be kidding…

Yuvraj- Why? I can eat this! (Yuvraj frowned determindly.)

Suhani- Go on then… (Suhani smirked teasingly, raising her eyebrow.)

Yuvraj squeezed his eyes shut and gulped down a gollgappa like a tablet making everyone giggle. Suhani had a pretty smile on her face that Yuvraj had to return. She reached over and to Yuvraj’s suprise… she ruffled his hair endearingly making him shake his head away.

Yuvraj- Hey! You messed up my hair!

Suhani- tough luck. (She smirked proudly.)

Yuvraj frowned cutely making the kids laugh.

Suhani- Oh come on sadu Kumar… (She picks up a gollgappa with a sigh) Here have this and smile…

She shoved another golgappa in to his mouth and he chews it down slowly.Then he smiles obligingly making Suhani happy.

Yuvaan yawns loudly with tired groggy eyes and hugs on to Suhani’s leg in tiredness. Yuvraj leans down and fondles with his hair.

Yuvraj- i think its time to go home… (He smiled in a fatherly fashion.)

Suhani also rubs her eyes cutely with a small yawn as she nods. Yuvraj smiles at her adorable face and pink tinted button nose.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Fake dadi opened the door and smiled poliely at the driver, she whispered some things to him and secretly slipped him some money to keep her identity secret. She gets in to the car and shuts the door behind her as the car Yuvaanms off to the hose pump area.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

Yuvraj puts the phone against his ear and calls up the same driver.

Yuvraj- Hello driver saab can you come and pick us up? … Ok… Okay thank you.. thank you bye.

Suhani’s head slumps down slightly in tiredness.

Yuvraj- Try stay awake miss Suhani, the driver is just coming. (He laughs at her childish state and lets her rest forehead on his shoulder. Yuvaan and Yuvani both already in his lap.)

…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

Fake Dadi- Okay…. drop me here for a second pick up just the children, just the children, then we will carry on.

The drivers nods at her stern command and Yuvaanms round the corner of the road, ignoring the honking traffic.

……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

The driver rolls down the window and smiles at Yuvraj professionally. Yuvraj smiles back politely, and opens the passenger seat front door. The driver holds out a hand to stop him, confusing Yuvraj and Suhani and the kids behind him.

Driver- Sorry sir, i have orders especially from the birla house to keep this seat vacant to pick someone up.

Suhani- Its fine driver saab. Come Yuvaan, let your papa and sister go back to the birla house, lets walk back home…. (yuvraj looks at the blank forced Suhani dejectedly, not wanting her to be parted from him.)

Yuvaan- But Mumma, I want to stay at Birla House! (He stormped his foot on the ground with a stubborn thump.)

Yuvani- haan mumma, pleaseeee… (She pouted childishly.)

Yuvraj- Come on Suhani, listen to the children… Yuvaan can stay. (He pretended it for just for the children but his heart just couldnt let Suhani leave.) Driver saab who is this seat for?

The driver stumbled for answers.

Driver- well sir-

Suhani- Fine Yuvaan you go with them, you three take the car, ill walk.

Worry for Suhani distracted Yuvraj from his questioning thoughts.

Yuvraj- are you crazy Suhani, its almost dark, its way too dangerous for you to walk. (his eyes were wide with concern.)

Suhani- But Yuvraj… I always walk-

Yuvraj- No way. Driver saab… You take the kids, I’ll walk Suhani there and meet you.

Suhani- Dont worry Yuvraj, you go its- (Yuvraj slams the car door shut as if to finish the discussion.)

The driver turns the key in the ignition with a relieved smile. He starts driving to the birla house to drop the kids off, before he had to pick up fake dadi again.

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Yuvraj and Suhani walk down the street, Yuvraj watched Suhani stumble down the road with tiredness and ached to hold her hand. But he knew hat was no longer his right, so he refrained from doing anything wrong to her.

..Yuvraj POV..

Nobody could deny how stunning she looked in that tight fitting yellow salwar and those brown long lashed eyes that were so big and beautiful that you couldnt forget them. But all that love for her that blurred my rational vision made me despise her, and despise life. Because now i will never get what I love, what i will never be able to let go of. She will always be infront of me, within arms reach, but there would be this formidable force keeping us apart, that I no longer have the strength to over come. I love her and will love her forever and thats what hurts the most. The worlds most painful pleasure is falling in love with Suhani Shivarstav.

..end of Pov..

After a while of walking, with a deathly silence and awkward distance they come across a threatening looking deserted part of the road. A group of 5 men stood in the corner, sipping from trashy metal cans. Their feasting gaze lands on the beautiful suhani and they smirk. Suhani senses something odd surrounding her and shivers slightly with chills running down her spine. Yuvraj automatically places a proective arm on Suhani’s shoulder and looks around for danger.

The men appear from the darkness of the shadows and smile forebodingly. They advance toward suhani, looking her up and down. Yuvraj look at them with a stare of utter disgust. He grabs suhani’s waist and pulls her in to his side, his strong manly arm wrapping protectively around her.

He walks straight through the group of men, his blood boiling with rage and carries on in to the distance. He looks down at Suhani with left over anger.

Yuvraj- see! Look… what would have happened if you had walked by yourself! ( Suhani cowered with shame while Yuvraj yelled.) God, I was so scared. (He pulled her in tighter, gripping on to her like valuable treasure.)

Suhani sees the car that they put the children in parked in a dark corner (Outside handpump area), and she tenses in worry.

Suhani- Yuvraj! Why is the car here!? (Yuvraj turns and also becomes worried.)

They both rush to the area and climb through the bushes in to the hand pump area. They look around rapidly, terrifyed. Yuvraj calls up the house.

Yuvraj- Maa, have the kids arrived home safe?… Ok. Thank god. … yes maa, she is with me. Thank you… ok… bye. (He cuts the phone with a sigh of relief.) suhani… the kids are at home.

Suhani- Thank god. (She pauses for a moment in realisation.) But that still doesnt explain why the car is here…

Yuvraj- Your right… wait a second… listen…

From a close distance they hear a whispering voice, and they listen attentively.

Fake dadi- We need to kill that woman asap… And since that detective Suhani is yours i need you distracting her.

Yuvraj and Suhani both try and peer over the rubbish they were hiding behind, Suhani shaking in fear and Yuvraj’s eyes bloodsho in anger. But Fake dadi sees them and they dont see her. She quickly turns aroudd an whispers down the phone to Sambhav.

Fake dadi- Yuvraj and Suhani are here right now… come distract them…

Suhani tries to run from their hiding play to see what is happening but…

Yuvraj holds her hand around her wrist, tugging her back. He presses a single finger against her soft kissable lips, silencing her. They have an eyelock, their eyes having an intense conversation of love and fear and emotion.

Yuvraj- Dont go Suhani, its too dangerous. Pleas-

Their moment is interupted by approaching footsteps. They immediately let go of each other and looked up. They both gasped in suprise to see an insanely furious Sambhav glaring at them.

Sambhav- Suhani! You unfaithful shameless woman! You cheat and liar! How dare you do such things behind my back! (Sambhav yells, uncontrollably shaking.)

Suhani cowers backwards in fear and yuvraj sees this and becomes furious at sambhav.

Sambhav- BESHARAM AORATH! (He pushes suhani in anger making her stumble back.)

Yuvraj catches Suhani’s arm before she can fall and stands inbetween her and Sambhav, bearing his chest in anger.

Yuvraj- What do you think you are doing!?

Sambhav- What does she think she is doing!?

Yuvraj doesnt give it another thought and slaps Sambhav around the face, leaving a sore red mark.

Yuvraj turns back with love and fear filled eyes for Suhani to see that she isnt there.

Yuvraj- suhani!?(He yells at he top of his lungs, scared for his life.)

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

She lets out an ear-spliting screech as she falls to the ground, unconcious and clutching her bleeding head.

Fake dadi grings, clutching a metal rod stained with innocent blood.

‘This is why you keep away from me…’ she thought.

She runs away in to the night.

Precap:
Yuvraj’s heart churns at the scream, and he starts running frantically.

Yuvraj- SUHANI!!!!!