My only wish ….. Os

Guys this is a purely mother child story ….. A real one ….. So please those who will be able to understand the emotions behind this story read it ….. N bashers stay away

Guys if you all don’t want to read fully it’s up to you but please read the last part its very important ….

This one is not for comments or I got some new idea it’s just that today is my mother’s b’day so I thought to share my feelings right now (emotional people’s already warning you )

N I took those characters while you all can connect through …..

N I’m saying sorry if I hurt anyone by this

So let’s start ,

Girls pov …

They say there is a reason,
They say that time will heal
But neither time nor reason
Will change the way I feel
For no one knows the heartache
That lies behind my smile
No one knows that how many times
I have broken down and cried
They say believe in God
But he took away my turn
To tell her how much I love
He just leaves me to bleed
Leaving behind
Those beautiful memories
Like a thousand knifes in my heart

I close my dairy ….. Yet one more day without you ma …… N today also seems that it happened yesterday ……

You left me but didn’t thought of once that after you there stood my soul which was breaking in millions of pieces

My thoughts were broken by a hand caressing my hairs …..

I no need to turn my face because I knew who he might be ……. My little brother ….. Laksh ….. He is just two years younger than me but still more stronger than me …… I have seen the change in him after that incident …… The fun loving childish brother of mine suddenly became so nature that he never cried instead wiped everyone tears

He calls me
“Dii”

I still remember the time when we had our ma before us he never used to call me dii but by my name ….. He changed or I should say everyone n everything changed …….

I wiped my years n looks at him with the same fake smile …..

We were interrupted by my other little brother ….. Ayush ……. He is eleven years younger than me but sometimes I think he is also more mature n stronger than me …..

Ayush – bhaiya didi come have your dinner

I nods my head when laksh asked him a ques which alerts me

Lakah – chotu did papa come

I looks at ayudh with hopeful eyes I know that he will not be there but still a hope that might be today he will be with us ….
But ayush answer shatters that hope also
Ayush – bhaiya he called me n said that he will be late so we should have out dinner n not to wait for him

I know what work he might be having ….. It is already nine how much more late could he be but i can’t say him wrong also its his so called family ….. His two younger brothers …… who treats him like there personal assistant …….
Sometimes I doubt is he there real brother or not ……

I still remember that day when ayush was just of 15 days n he was having high fever n was admitted in hospital

Flashback

We all were standing in ayush ward where he was lying on bed n was crying vigorously due to pain …… His body was attached with wires ……. Due to him moving his body the wires shifts causing his skin to become red

Mom was sitting beside him caressing his hairs ….. Her eyes were moist as if it was not ayush but she herself there on his place ……

I tried calling papa from mom phones many times but he was not picking up the phone ……
Finally after many failed trials he picked up the call but before I could speak he said immediately

Papa – shomi I’m busy in meeting I’ll call you back when I’m free

I tried saying him but he cuts the call ……

Now what should I do we needed money for his treatment …… N I can’t see my mom breaking ……

I instantly left to home to get all the money that might be possible I can get in there ……

As I reached home I was shocked …… There my both the chacha were there in home having there lunch happily with there family in there portion of house …..

That time I literally wanted to bang there head on wall ……

Somehow ayush treatment started …… But papa never showed up he was too busy to earn money not for us but for his family in which we were never counted

Flashback ends

My chain of thoughts was again broken by laksh

Laksh – dii I’m going down you also come n have your dinner ……

I just nods my head as both of them moved out of my room ……

I wonder if mon her been here we would have already eaten our dinner n might be with her in her room lying on her lap sharing our today’s story ……

I still remember the day when I told her that I secured second rank in state for my boards

Flashback
I came running home happily n directly went to kitchen ……
As always she was there washing dishes
I wonder how can she spent half of her day in kitchen

That time I shrugged my thoughts or I was too happy to think about it …..

I immediately ran n hugged her tightly ……… I was jumping in happiness describing her my happiness just I forgot to tell it’s cause …..

She was trying to calm me down

Mom – shona baccha what happened why are you so happy

Me – ops soory mom I forgot to tell you Mom I got second position in my boards

That day I saw the brightest smile on her face which I never saw in my 18 years …..

She was too happy I think more than me …… That day she prepared all my favourite dishes for dinner

Flashback ends

I miss that food made by my mom ….. at that time I was too careless to think because she was always there with me to make all food items I desire but now when she is far away I wish that only one I get to eat her hand made food even of its brinjal the vegetable I hate most but it’s ok for me . ……

A year escapes my eyes thinking what happens after that …..

Flashback
I was enjoying my favourite dishes with my brothers she were as always fighting on silly things …..

Mom was sitting beside me admiring us ….. She always used to eat after we n papa finished eating …… I didn’t understood her at that time why she used to do such things …..

Here comes papa …..
Papa – ary everyone is happy today is there something which I don’t know

How ever papa is I still love him …… He enjoys with us when ever he gets time ….. N I’m really attached to him

I waiting to tell him this good news n now I can’t wait ……

I happily told him but his expression changes to serious one listening me ……

Is he not happy

What he said next shocked me

Papa – you should have got first position then I could have proudly told everyone …… There is nothing to vr happy in it ….. look for yourself where you lacked …….

Mom tried to stop him but he didn’t ……

I ran from there crying

I was lying on my bed tears brimming my eyes …..

When mom came with food ……
She made me sit properly n herself feeds me ……

Her feathery touch
Her soothing words were like medicine to my wounds

Flashback ends

I miss her warm embrace
Her feathery touch
Mostly her soothing lap
Which absorbed all my years when my eyes were moist

She was an angel for me
But I always used to fight with her
I regret now …..
I never understood that whatever she was saying was for my good

Flashback
Me – mom please understand I want to go on that trip

Mom – but beta it’s not safe

Me (shouts) – but my all friends are going then why are you not allowing

Mom – shona if it would be from school side then I don’t have any problem but you Childers made this plan ….. There is no safety how can I say yes shona

Me – mom please try to understand

But
Mom sternly – shona you are not going that’s final

Me – I hate you Mom …… You are very bad
I ran from there crying ……

I can listen her calling me from behind …….. Her voice sounds wet but that time I was too concerned for myself to listen to her

Flashback ends

Now I wants to apologize to her ….. It’s now I understood the meaning behind her no

I always hurts her n she accepts everything from me without any complain

I had everyone to share my pain with but her
Even if she was breaking from inside
Her soul was fearing apart
But
She had no one to share her pain with

Now I regret
Knowingly or unknowingly I added more pain to her suffering
Already she was suffering from family pressure ….
Papa not giving your to her
His family bashing mom
Society talking all sought of things about our family
Her dad died
Her mom has never been well
Her brother was jobless …..
Many more things which I also don’t know

But still she protected us from all bad
She still had that smile on her face

N finally she lost her strength
That hole in her heart took away her life
It snatched my only support
It snatched laksh only strength
It snatched a five year old ayush only soothing place
In short it snatched our lives
Now we all are not living
WE ALL ARE SURVIVING

I only wish you knew that you mean the world to me and I LOVE YOU
________

Things which mom never tells you

* you made her cry ….. A lot
* she wanted that last piece of pie
* it hurts
* she was always afraid
* she knows she is not perfect
* she watched you as you slept
* she carried you a lot longer than mine months
* it broke her heart every time you cried
* it pained her much more than you when you got hurt
* she keeps watching door time to time when you are late from coaching
* she skips her food when ever you are unwell
* she made you eat that last chapati to not to let you sleep hungary even if her stomach is not full
* she will do it all again
________
Never complain about what your parents couldn’t give you ……
It was probably all they had
________