Radharani…Name toh hear kiya hi hoga! (OS)

Hey mai god….what din happen ho gaya…samayra today radharani pe os write kar rahi hai…ab bechaari karegi bhi what…radharani hai hi this much great…without uske Devakshi ki story kab ki over ho gayi hoti…with a happy ending…. But sirf radharani ki reason se lakhs people now bhi KRPKAB see kar paa rahe hai….so here is a tribute to our QUEEN….. RADHARANI urf X-GKB.

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“A tongue of honey, a heart of gall”…. It’s not this proverb that defines our protagonist, its her who defines this proverb.
RADHARANI-EK CHALTI PHIRTI UNHONI
Born in the family of snake charmers, she managed to nearly give a heart attack to her parents as soon as she was born. Her mother fainted seeing her little child behave like snakes.
Radha would take out her tongue and wriggle it just as snakes do….phisssssss???
Her father blamed her mother, ” kaha tha Maine pregnancy mein har waqt naagin mat dekho, lo ab paida ho gayi na naagin”….phisssss??

At the naming ceremony the pandit said, “Aapki beti ke chaal chalan theek nahi lag rahe hai…Iska naam hum Nagarani rakhne hai”.
Her mother protested, “Nahiiiiiii…..meri beti ka naam sirf radharani hoga….aur Kuch bhi nahi…..warna main aatmahatya kar loongi…aag laga loongi khudko”… ( ab pata chala GKB mein itni dramebaazi kaha se aayi….apni mummy pe gayi hai bas).

Radha was the eldest of 13 siblings, she lost her childhood at a very young age coz she had to look after her brothers n sisters and raise them….(tabhi toh neha ki shubhchintak bani phirti thi….connect)

Her childhood revolved around snakes, all sort of snakes, she loved to be with them, play with them, she found solace in their company.(saanpo ke saath reh kar usse Kuch Kuch hota hai….tum nahi samjhoge)

Well, time flew and radha grew up to become a beautiful lady….yes she was the most beautiful naagin in the whole sapera clan. Even then I don’t know why but boys always ran away seeing her. She took very good care of her beauty. Naag panchami pe saara doodh khud hi pee jaati thi…doodh se hi nahati thi, malayi ka lep lagti thi…uff kya nahi karti thi ladko ko attract karne ke liye…..but sadly all in wain.

“Chadhti jawani meri chaal mastani..
Tune qadar na jaani rama….
Haaye rama……..
Haaye rama”………

Its time to get her married… Nobody knows how on earth did the Tripathis agreed to get a girl like her to marry their sone jaisa son. May be becoz their daughter herself was no less than a masterpiece in disguise. They could probably feel the pain and fear of radha’s parents and hence agreed for the alliance.

Marriage done, now radharani became Radharani Tripathi….a mother of a son….Vikram Tripathi… I wonder why she didn’t name him nagraj….but I guess baldev must have revolted.

Anyway, so our very own radharani had this weird way of acknowledging her self as ” Garib Ki Beti”……reason was quite obvious…the snake charmer family was poverty stricken a long time back….but soon they got into some wealth. But until this time radha had realised that garib ki beti gets more importance and concern from the society than radharani…. ( she didn’t realise ki usse bheekh kehte hai)…so she continued calling herself GKB…such an insult for the poor of our country I must say!…

There was don’t thing that I really admired (sarcastically) about her…..how the hell can someone be so selfish n cruel. I wanted to know the story behind her poisonous tongue and mind.

This is what I found out.

When GKB was a child, one day, just out of curiosity, she opened a little black bottle which had a mixture of snake-poison collected by her fathers and forefathers. It was sthe deadliest poison ever made. But RR had always been a daredevil..(dekha Nahi kaise apna ghar jala diya…..himmat chahiye aisa Kuch karne ke liye bhai) …..and guess what she drank the whole bottle in one go…without even letting out a burp…. Had she been a normal human being she would have died then and there…… But no…..she isn’t a normal human…..she is an alien…an alien from an unknown planet of snakes…..she is their descendant.
And that is why she’s still alive with all the poison hidden inside her that shows up from time to time.

Seven years ago, Radharani had entered Dixit house….only to make it the ghost house. Her will power and determination was bigger than Devakshi’s love at that time and certainly bigger than ishwari’s small sized Brain..(microscope leke bhi dekhu toh shayad na dikhe).

She successfully separated devakshi and began ruling in the ghost house. I heard that she took some English classes. So I went on to investigate.

You must have heard about the University of Oxford right!….it has a watchman near the main front gates. He has a servant in his house. That servant had once been to India. He found a girl there and married her. She gave birth to a boy and died. The man left that boy in an orphanage and went back. This boy grew up to become a teacher in a govt school in rural India. In that school there was a boy…a backbencher… Who never studied anything… And grew up to become a taxi driver in Delhi….it was this taxi driver that gave GKB….oh sorry…..its X-GKB now…tutions. So now you know how she learned this wonderful English…. If you wanna learn it too…contact her she will give you the address of that taxi driver…

Yesterday X-GKB said that she has learned nutrition as well and that is why her skin gelow kar rahi hai….(mirror mein jaake dekh buddhi….tujhe nutrition ya makeup ki nahi plastic surgery ki zaroorat hai)

Ji haan toh humari X-GKB ek baar phir apne nikamme body builder protein shake se chalne waale bete ki helps leke Devakshi ko alag karna chahti hai….but unfortunately is baar unka pyar Iske determination aur will power se bahut bahut bada hai…..karle Jo karna hai Kuch nhi hone waala…..

But ek sawaal reh jaata hai…..jab X-GKB aisi kisi jagah mein nahi rehti jaga uski respect nahi hoti…..toh ab tak woh is duniya mein kya kar rahi hai…..point to ponder.

Hey bhagwaan uthaale Isse warna hazaaro log ek alien ke murder ke jurm mein jail chale jaayenge….

Jab tak bhagwaan humari prayer sunta nahi tab tak let’s feel sorry for our protagonist…. Coz I read somewhere….

“Miserable people love to make others miserable. Don’t hate them, just feel sorry for them.”
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P.S. Plz Mujhe maarna mat sab milke???