Fan Fiction

SARPHIRE SHORT STORY ON ISHQBAAZ

SOCHNA JAN HIT MA JAARI HA: Isey padhne se maut b ho sakti hai kamzor dil waley aur khadoos log na padhey kyuki unke liye kala akshar bhains barabar. Aur agar padhta padhta aap apni kursi Sa gir jayan toh huma korsi ka bill bhejna Ki ganimat na Karan. Abb aaplog issa padh sakta ha uss Sa pehla aapni aapni kursi Ki baati baandh Lai.
DHANYAWAAD

Well according to the upcoming track Om will be leaving the Oberoi mansion. So now let’s see what happens when he is asked to leave the mansion and will he go or not.

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Tej: Om tum ghaar chod ka ja sakta ho
(Om you can leave the house and go.)
OM: Okay mai ghar chhor ke jaa raha hun.
(Okay I am leaving the house and going.)
Shivay: mat jaa Om
(Please don’t go Om.)
Om: mai jaa raha hu Shivay mujhe mat ROK
(I am going Shivaay don’t stop me.)
Rudra: O tu chala gaya to sabzi kaun banayega.
(O if you went then who will make the vegetables.)
Om: Badtameez mai yaha sabzi bananaye ke liye hu kya
(Idiot am I here to cook food.)
Shivay: mat ja Om baat samjh.
(Don’t go Om, please try to understand.)
Om : kya samjhun mai haan kya samjhu sala itni problem hai na is mansion me tum log samjho pata bhi hai kitna bada hai mujhe ek kaam minto me karna ho to ghanto me hota hai sala itna bada distance hai har kamre ke beech me agar bandey ko bathroom Jana ho to bhai agar WO kamre me hai to theek nahi to pressure rokna padta hai bathroom tak pahuch ne ke liye arey ye soch rahey hai mai inki wajah se jaa raha hu naah inki wajah se to cheeinti ghar na chhorey mai to insaan hoon mai to bhai isliye chhor raha hu chhotey ghar me rahunga chain se zindagi bitaunga

(Hye what should I understand, you guys try to understand. Do you even know how much problem is there in this mansion. This mansion is so big, the work which I have to do in minutes it takes hours to do that, stupid’s there is so much of distance between the rooms. And if by chance a person needs to use washroom, in case he or she is in room then it’s okay but otherwise the person has to control himself until and unless I don’t reach washroom. Moreover this man is thinking that I am leaving house because of him. Because of him an ant will also not leave the house and I am still a human. Plus if I will stay in a small house I would live my life peacefully.)
Rudra: par tumhe to akele rehna b nahi aata.
(But you don’t know how to stay alone.)
Om: seekhunga

(I will learn.)
Rudra: poori tarah khana pakana b nahi aata
(You don’t even know how to cook food properly.)
OM: seekhunga
(I will learn that also.)
Rudra: tumhe to seekhna b nahi aata.
( But You don’t even know how to learn.)
Om: mai saley Taine thappad maar dena hai tu.mujhe motivate kar raha hai ya demotivate.
(You idiot I will slap you hard across your face. Are you motivating me or demotivating me.)
Tej : ye ho kya raha hai
(What the hell is this happening.)
Om: Mujra chal raha hai aao aap bhi nacho par anaarkali ki tarah.
(Dance is going on, come you also join us.)
Jhanvi to Tej: Nahi maat naachna in kutton ka saamna.
(No Tej don’t dance ? in front of these dogs.)
OM: achha kutto ka problem hai Oh Shivaay chal bhai kuttey hata.
(Oh so the problem is with the dogs, come on Shivaay make these dogs to leave.)
Anika: Yeh khud hi andaar chala jayanga toh masla solve ho Jaya ga.
(Oh in that case if he would himself leaves the place, then that would even work.)

On the other side Tej Jhanvi argue with each other.
Tej: Aab ma tera liya audience America Sa bulaaun.
(Oh so shall I bring audience from America for you.)
Jhanvi: Chal re ab mangwana hi hai to Britain se mangwa salon ne bada raaj kiya hum par tera dance dikha kar torture karenge unhe.
(Oh if you have to bring the audience then bring them from Britain, those morons have ruled on us for a long time but now let’s torture them showing your dance ?.)
Tej: Tun mangwala Queen Victoria toh Teri chachi lagti ha na.
(You bring them, Queen Victoria is your aunty only.)
Jhanvi : nahi meri chchi saas lagti hai
(No she is my Aunty-in- law.)
Aur agar meri chachi b hai to tu hi bulwa kyuki damaad ki baat jaldi suni jati hai jamai raja.
(And if she is my aunt also then you only invite her after all son-in-law’s request would be heard soon.)
Pinky: O my Mata jethani ji aapna toh bataya hi nahi mujha.
(O My Mata sister-in-law you didn’t tell me.)
Jhanvi: AB bata Diya na yaad rakhiyo mata ki bhakt.
(Now I have informed you na, so remember it, Mata’s devotee.)
Shakti: Aur inquiry toh aisa kar rahi ha jaisa khud baadi finance minister lagi ho tuna cheque clear kar ka Dena ha yah ticket katwani ha unki.
(And you are doing inquiry as in you are finance minister and you have to clear their cheque or you have to buy them a ticket.)
Pinky: Hein mai finance minister hun. Shakti ji mainu to pata hi nahi tha ab to mere shivay ka rutba aur Badh Jana hai.
(Oh Shakti ji I am finance minister, I didn’t know that only now my Shivaay will have more respect.)
Shivaay: Hey maa kali yo ka ho rao hai.
(Oh goddess Kali what all this happening.)
He says banging his palm on his forehead.
Anika: Tera chootha Ki tayari chaal rahi ha. Sathiya aaj Hume neend nahi aayegi suna hai teri mehfil me rat jaga hai.
(You last rites are going on. And friend tonight we are not going to get any sleep.)
Soumya: logo ke ghar me log pagal hotey hai yaha to sala poora ghar hi pagal hai.
(In house few people are mad but her the entire house is mad.)
Anika: Ma toh kehti hun ghaar ka baar hi likwa do pagal khana.
(I say that we should get it written on the door of the house only that “WELCOME TO PAGAL KHANA”
Shivaay: No Anika likhwana ha toh lunatic asylum likhwao.
(No Anika if you have to get it written only, then write Lunatic Asylum.)
Anika banged her purse on his face: Saley ek baar aur ye bola na maa kasam asylum to nahi tera makbara zaroor banega.
(You idiot once again you say this na then I am sure that asylum is made or not but your tomb would definitely be made.)
Anika murmurs to herself in irritation: Ek toh iss Tadibaaz Ki tadi nahi khatam hoti. Sala Hindi me bolo tab b kehta hai what’s this language.
(This egoistic man can never get rid of showing off. Moreover even if I speak in Hindi then also this duffer can’t understand anything.)
Rudra: Aabe yaar koi deen dimaan ha aap logon ka. Yahan unka maasla nahi solve ho raha aur yahan aap chalu ho Gaya ho. Ek masla solve Hon do baaki baad ma solve kar lainga.
(Hye do you guys have some brain or not, here one matter isn’t getting solved and you all have started with different matters. Let’s first solve one matter then we will discuss others as well.)
Om: Thanks Rudra pehli baar tuna koi akal Ki baat kahi ha.
(Thanks Rudra for the very first time you have said something right.)
As no one stopped and continued. Om shouts.
Om: Abey chup karo Saara yahan Jo masla ha uss par concentrate karo.
(Shut up! All of you and concentrate on the present problem.)
Shivaay: Masla kya tha waisey.
(By the way what was the problem.
Rudra: Haan toh thik ha masla yahi ha na ki aapko washroom Jana Ki problem ha. (Oh the problem is that only, that Om has problem in going to washroom.)
Anika: Saala bol toh aisa raha ha jaisa ussa kabz ho.
(Idiot he saying as in Om is suffering from constipation.)
Shivaay: Haan to theek hai hum poore ghar me washrooms banwa denge.
(Haan, it’s ok then we will make washrooms in the entire house.)
Dadi: To nalayako ja ke public toilet me hi reh lo.
(So why don’t you dumb people go and stay in a public toilet.)
Anika: Gadha ghar ka baar samohik shochalya ka board bhi lagwa dena.
(Donkeys right “PUBLIC TOILET ?” only outside the house.)
Tej on hearing all this nonsense says in frustration
Tej: Saali gandi awlaad na maza na swaad.
(Worst son neither joy nor fun)
Om: Bol toh aisa raha Han jaisa khud tuti fruty hota ha.
(He is talking as in he himself is a yummy dessert ?.)
Jhanvi: oye ullu de patthey.
(He shut up you idiot’s son.)
Tej : tumne mujhe ullu bola.
(Did you right now called me an idiot.)Jhanvi innocently: Maine kab bola.
(No when did I say that.)
Tej: Abhi to ullu de pathey bola Om ko
(No right now only you Said to Om.)
Jhanvi: To kya patthey de ullu bolun.
(So should I say that other way round.)
Dadi: Chup khota da puttar.
(Shut up! You donkey.)
Tej : Khota da puttar
(Donkey.)
Anika: Are yaar samajh Ata ha ek baar ma baar baar highlight karna Ki kya zaroorat ha.
(Oh we can understand in one go no need to highlight over and over again.)
Shivaay: Tum chup karogi jab dekho bakti rehti ho.
(Will you shut up! You always keep on blurting out things.)
Anika: Do duni chaar char duni aath is aadmi ki to mai laga doongi vaat.
(Two into two is equal to four and four into four is equal to eight and today I will not leave this man.)
Shivaay: What was that.
Anika: arey yrr…. Sin theeta cos theeta maa kasam agar aaj Maine is aadmi ko nahi peta.
(Ughhh… Sin theta cos theta and by god if I didn’t kill this man today.)
Shivaay: Oye tun mujha pitagi Shivaay Singh Oberoi ko.
(Oh so you will kill me, I am Shivaay Singh Oberoi.)
Muh sambhal kar baat karo.
(Talk carefully with me.)
Anika: Mai saley apna dupatta na sambhal loon tujhse baat karne k liye muh sambhalney ke bajay.
(I will prefer peace than talking with you.)
Shivaay: Tumhe Zara bhi tameez nahi Anika.
(You don’t even have a bit of manners Anika.)
Anika: Tel laina gayi tameez.
(To hell with manners.)
Tia: Hye what was that.
All together say in chorus.
Shivay Anika in chorus : JHAND.
Dadi: Maro siyapo.
Jhanvi and Pinky: O my Mata.
OmRu: GHANTA.

To be continued……..
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All right guys that’s all for now, catch you all soon with next part of “SARPHIRE”. But till then don’t forget to drop your comments on this hilarious ride. All sorts of comments will be accepted from talliyan to galliyan ji bhaar kar do Jo Dena chahta ho. But do drop your views.

MISDIRECTED BY ??: KHORAFAATI TEAM {SURBHI DI & SHIVIKA}

Keep laughing ????
&
For now
Bye bye ?

shivika22kapoor

Be you and be happy to be you.......

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