SWASAN: AASHIYAN
PREVIOUS EPISODE- episode-4
about one and half months later of laksh’s disappearance.
standing by the window and gazing at the plants in the pot placed in the corridor she was remembering the past which moistened her eyes with tears. well tears has been a part of her life and since these one and a half months her eyes were never dry but this was unnoticed by all. emptiness filled her heart but a hope kept her alive.
she remembered the time when someone grew plants like this in pots and in the garden. it was that time when they were none to each other but friends and at that time also he loved her and being far they still were so close, near to each other, wiping each other’s tears and understanding each other and now is the time when he is her husband, her life, her everything but still is so far from her. one and a half months they haven’t seen each other and it’s not his fault but hers.
the worst part in all this is that she knew she is doing wrong, she knew he will be hurt, he will be pained, and yet she took that step. with each passing day she just wish to see him and talk to him and show him all her love and care but she can’t do that because he doesn’t want that.
swara- [to herself] sanskar i will yet again break another promise given to you if you don’t find laksh and come back soon because i can’t hold back. i want to tell you all these first as this is your right. and for giving you this right i will have to do what i never intend to do and that is to break one more promise given to you. but this time if the promise will be broken then it will be solely for you and this time for breaking my promise you won’t be angry but may be the thing i will tell you may cause anger to you. i miss you and i love you a lot. i am sorry. please find laksh fast. i can’t wait more whatever may be the consequences of my return. i just want to come back to you and this time i won’t hurt you. i am sorry for what i did. i am sorry.
some tears escaped her eyes again and she herself wiped it as no one else was there to wipe it for her. the pain she is enduring in her heart and soul is eating her bit by bit everyday. although she never wanted this, no one wants but she unintentionally either choses it or she gets it by destiny.
lost in her own world of miseries, pain, loneliness and hope she comes to sense with the ringing of her mobile. with slow strides she reached the bed side table and picked up her mobile only to be happy and glow because it was the call of her love, her sanskar. after a long one and half months she will talk to him, he is himself calling to her. her happiness has no boundaries. with happy tears she immediately picked up the call but she felt nervous to talk to him. it’s so much time that they have spoken to each other.
on the other side sitting in his car which was parked at road side sanskar was waiting for the call to be received. he had mixture of emotions when he traced the mobile screen to call swara. and when the call was received he too went silent.
both had so many emotions on their faces and heart and off course one of them was the feel of the other due to the light breathing sound they heard because of the dead silence around them. after a long separation finally they were at the point where they could talk.
all other thoughts went numb and just the thought of the other occupied their mind and the feel was incredible.
swara- [slowly, softly, shiveringly, and lovingly]- san..s..kar…
sanskar on the other side closed his eyes hearing her voice specially his name from her after a long span. his heart filled with happiness, an unknown satisfaction feeling the love in the voice. he was lost at that moment and was about to reciprocate it with same love by calling her name but stopped due to the knock on his window. he looked up to find the inspector and reality striked him. the inspector pointed out a direction and seeing there all the past memories flooded his mind. he then looked at his mobile which was connected to swara.
closing his eyes to calm himself he spoke to her.
sanskar- [in normal emotionless tone] i have called you to inform that i have found laksh. i will come back with him in an hour and half. so inform ragini and maa-baba about this and will come with laksh directly to maheshwari mansion. so you better know what to do.
swara- [happily] really..it means we……. [call got disconnected before she completes her sentence.
swara- hello..hello…sanskar…
she was left disappointed seeing the call disconnected but cheered up the next moment because the time has come that she will go back to him. everything will get fine just like before. laksh will be back, family will be united and complete and they will be back together hopefully.
she hurriedly came in hall and called out for ragini and shemish loudly in happiness.
swara- ragini….ragini…. maa….baba…… where are you all…..come out fast….maa….ragini….
sumi- shona what happened. why are you shouting?
swara just smiled wide with tears in her eyes.
swara- wait maa. let baba and ragini come.
swara- baba ….ragini….baba…..
shekhar- [a little scolding] what is this swara…. why are you shouting?….. see ayush woke up due to your continuous shouts…..
swara- [got sad but then recovered and took ayush from shekhar who was still angry] [to ayush] soryy chotu. didi was just so happy that why. now don’t cry. [she lightly tickled him and the ayush laughed ]
meanwhile ragini came there.
ragini- what is it swara. why were you calling me
swara giving ayush to sumi, she came to ragini and cupped her face.
swara- ragini happiness is back in our lives. sanskar..has…
ragini- swara please….i don’t want to talk about sanskarji.
swara became upset but she composed herself because this was not the time for argument and ragini is not in condition to be argued with.
swara- once listen to me. please…
ragini- [turning her face away] say…
swara- [said in one breath] sanskar has found laksh and he is coming back along with him in an hour and half.
it took few seconds for ragini to register her words and then she turned to swara.
ragini- swara…you….are saying..truth.
swara nodded tery eyed and with small smile. ragini hugged her immediately and cried out of happiness.
ragini- swara laksh is coming back… laksh…..finally he is back. my wait is over swara….. laksh… i caan’t believe this…. i am so happy.
shekhar came forward and kept his hand over ragini’s head.ragini turned and hugged shekahr who patted her gently calming her.
shekhar- ragini beta now everything will be fine. don’t cry….. it’s not good for you.
swara looked at everything teary eyed and small smile. sumi came forward and hugged swara sideways and then hugged ragini.
swara- accha now come and get ready. we have to leave for maheshwari mansion. sanskar and laksh will come there directly.
ragini- haan ham abhi tayar ho kar aate hai. [yes i am just coming in a while being ready]
swaragini went to their rooms for getting ready.
swara’s room-
swara took out sanskar’s photo and kissed it lovingly.
swara- finally our wait is over. we will be one again. i am waiting for you. come fast.
background music plays-
[INTEZAR INTEZAR INTEZAR INTEZAR
INTEZAR MUJHE MERE YAAR KAAAAA]*2
swara opens her cupboard and took out a dupatta. she put that dupatta over her head and looked at sanskar photo.
HAIIII
[MERE SARPE DUPATTA MERE PYAR KA]*4
KESHARIYAAAA….. BALMAAAAA….MOHIIII..
PADHARO …..MAHREEE…….. DESH
[INTEZAR]*4..INTEZARRRRRR…
swara- [looking at sanskar’s pic] finally i am coming back to you.
swara got ready and other side in ragini’s room, ragini was very happy and she was getting ready hastily.
KEHTA HAI MERA DIL
BARIYAA AA KE MIL
[RASTA NEEHARUN MAIN
TUJHKO PUKARUN MAIN]*2
shemish and swaragini along with ayush reached maheshwari mansion and swaragini hurriedly came inside and looked around the hall for sanlak if they reached. they were getting impatient. but sanlak till now did not reach. they went in and told maheshwari’s about what sanskar told and all became very happy and started waiting for the brothers to come.
[LAGI AISI LAGAN
BANI MAIN TOH JOGAN]*2
BIN TERE MAIN JEE NAA SAKUN
[AITBAAR]*4
AITBAARRR MUJHE MERE YAAR KA
HAIIII….
swaragini were pacing in the hall and sometimes coming out to see whether they arrived or not. swara’s dupatta was flying away but she caught it on time and again placed on her shoulders properly.
[MERE SARPE DUPATTA MERE PYAR KA]*2
TERE NAAM KI CHUNARIYAA
PEHANLI MAIN BAWARIYAA]*2
TU RANG DUN KESHARIYAA
AAJA SAWARIYAA
HOOOOOO HOO HOOOOOOO
otherside sanlak were shown who were coming in car. they were lost in their own world. going through lot of emotions the journey was silent. sanskar called on swara’s mobile and she immediately picked up.
swara- hello sanskar.. [said happily]
sanskar- we will reach in 15-20 minutes. did you inform ragini.
swara- haan i informed and we are waiting in maheshwari mansion.
sanskar- ok [and he cut the call]
this side ragini was about to take the call and was to ask to make her talk to laksh but call was disconnected and so she became sad. swara told her that they are coming in 15-20 minutes.
there laksh listening sanskar talking to swara looked toward him but sanskar was looking straight and talking on bluetooth and on mention of ragini’s name laksh was flooded with lot of emotions.
whereas sanskar felt the happiness in swara’s voice and he too felt a little happy. both brothers were lost in their love’s thoughts.
BOLE MERE BELIYA
JADU YE KYA KAR DIYA
[AANKHE BEHEKTI HAIN
SAANSEIN MEHEKTI HAIN]*2
[PAL PAL HAL CHAL
DIL JAYEE NAA MACHAL]*2
KISSE BAHON KA YE HAAR DUN
MUJHPE [HAI KHUMAR]*3
HAI KHUMAR MERE YAAR KA
HAIIIII
swaragini got even more impatient with each passing minute.
[MERE SAR PE DUPATTA MERE PYAR KA]*2
KESHARIYAA…BAALMAAA…..MOHIII
PADHAROOO….MAHREEE…DESH
[MERE SARPE DUPATTA MERE PYAR KA]*4
one side sanlak are shown coming in car while the other side swaragini are shown moving to and fro in the hall and other’s tensed, impatient, happy faces.
the one and half hour wait which seemed to be ages for swaragini ended as they heard the car halting sound outside. swaragini hurriedly came out followed by the others in happiness to meet laksh and sanskar.
outside sanskar parked the car and got down and laksh too stepped out from his side and in the mean time swaragini came out of the house and stood at their place for few seconds to capture the figure in front in their eyes. as they were looking at sanlak respectively, sanlak too looked at swaragini after all this separation was for all the four.
TU HI RE…. TU HI RE
TERE BINA MAIN KAISE JIYUN
AAJA RE….AAJA RE
YUNHI TADPA NAA TU MUJHKO
JAAN RE…..JAAN RE
IN SAANSON MAIN BAS JAANA TU
CHAND RE…. CHAND RE
AAJA DIL KI JAMIN PE TU
raglak moved slowly towards each other. tears flowed down their eyes. while swasan were just standing at there places unmoved. swara’s eyes were moist and any moment tears can escape but other hand sanskar’s eyes had only pain and hurt. love was still there but the pain is too much to express that love.
CHAHAT HAI AGAR
AAKE MUJHSE MIL JAA TU
YAA PHIR AISA KAR
DHARTI SE MILA DE MUJHKO
sanskar remembers the day swara left him all alone. how much their own room haunted him with their memories. each corner spoke of their moments. how he felt at that very moment. he has felt this pain earlier too but it wasn’t such as it is now. the love for kavita was mere infatuation, or teenage love which was just mere out of attraction and similarities they shared. but swara, she is his everything and she only blamed him and left him.his eyes began to moisture seeing her but he blinked his eyes to gulp them down not letting them to fall. although it gave burning sensation to his eyes but that was just a bit compared to his heart which is burning every moment since that day.
TU HI RE…. TU HI RE
TERE BINA MAIN KAISE JIYUN
AAJA RE….AAJA RE
YUNHI TADPA NAA TU MUJHKO
how much ever pain he had but still seeing her soothed his heart. he could see the love in her eyes but his heart questioned is this her love in which she couldn’t trust him. how did she thought that he will kill his own brother? the brother whom he never wished to hurt but just once due to misconception but still never wished to harm him physically or ever thought of his death. the fight between them was initiated by laksh and it grew due to laksh blaming sujata and swara which led him to fight back in anger.
it’s only her love and support he wishes for ever but even though he can see her love now he can’t come over the pain.
IN SAANSON KAA DEKHO TUM PAGALPAN TOH
AAYE NAHIN INHE CHAIN
MUJHSEYE BOLI MAIN RAHON MEIN TERI
APNE BICHA DU YE RAIN
he thought was all her promises she did to him meant nothing to her that she left him. left him when he needed her the most. didn’t she knew that she has become his breath, his reason of living that she denied to stay back even though he asked for it and even warned that she can never come back if she left? was there relation nothing to her, didn’t it had any importance to her when it meant everything to him?
IN UNCHE PAHADON SE JAAN DE DUNGA MAIN
AGAR TU NAA AAYI KAHIN
TUM UDHAR JANAM UMMID MERI JO TODO
IDHAR YE JAHAN CHODO MAIN
MAUTH AA ZINDAGI
TERI HAATHON MEIN DE DIYA RE
she knew that he jumped of the cliff to find her, he lived like a lifeless when she was nowhere to be found. she knew if he wouldn’t have got her back he would have given his life too. but still she left him and he wished death but it never came and now he thinks why to die for the one who did not care to listen and believe him and stay back or if not even that could not support him the least.
AAYI RE…AAYI RE
LE MAIN AAYI HOON TERE LIYE
TODA RE……. TODA RE
HAR BANDHAN KO PYAR KE LIYE
swara could see the hurt and pained look in his eyes. she can see how pale and lost he is. how much his health is deteriorated. this is giving more pain to her.
swara- [monologue] i am sorry sanskar for giving you this pain. but now i am there for you. this time truly i will leave everything behind for our love. i know in our relation our understanding for each other and most important love, trust and support that we balanced everything but i ruined everything and i am sorry for that. just this last time forgive me.
JAAN RE……..JAAN RE
AAJA TUJHME SAMA JAUN MAIN
DIL RE….. DIL RE
TERE SAANSON MAIN BAS JAUN MAIN
swara- [within herself]- sanskar i know i have done a grave mistake but i want to rectify it. i wanna live with you and be yours again and this forever such that i never move apart from you.
CHAHAT HAI AGAR
AAKE MUJHSE MIL JAA TU
YAA PHIR AISA KAR
DHARTI SE MILA DE MUJHKO
TU HI RE…. TU HI RE
TERE BINA MAIN KAISE JIYUN
AAJA RE….AAJA RE
YUNHI TADPA NAA TU MUJHKO
sanskar- swara that day you just did not stepped outside the house but showed how weak and non- understandable our love and relation is. for once you could have stopped and we would have talked. but you left. i wouldn’t have ever stopped you from supporting ragini or going to baadi. i supported you the time when baba took you on our wedding day or when maa needed your support. same way this time too i would have supported you this time too. all i wanted is your trust and support for me. that you stand for me but you chose to stand against me, against our love.
sanskar- now also i feel to call you and take you in my embrace. to hug you and release all the pain i have in your embrace to feel free, free from the loneliness and dejection i am caged in. but i can’t. i will not ever allow myself to melt for you again.
SAU BAAR BULAYE
MAIN SAU BAAR AAUN
EK BAAR JO DIL DIYA
EK AANKH ROYI , TOH DUJI BOLO
SOOYEGI KAISE BHALA
IN PYAR KI RAHON MAIN PATHAR HI KITNE
UN SABKO HI PAAR KIYA
EK NADI HOON MAIN CHAHAT BHARI
AAJ MILNE SAGAR KO AAYI YAHAN
SAJNAA.. SAJNAAA
AAJ AASUN BHI MITHE LAGE
swara- i know sanskar i have given you pain but i went through the same pain. when your eyes cried sanskar i also cried. how could i live peacefully sanskar when you were not there. i had to share so many things to you sanskar but i didn’t got a chance. i wanted to clarify everything between us but couldn’t. tears were the only thing i had but after long time today tears also seems to be sweet as it is of happiness to get back to you.
TU HI RE…. TU HI RE
TERE BINA MAIN KAISE JIYUN
AAJA RE….AAJA RE
YUNHI TADPA NAA TU MUJHKO
JAAN RE…..JAAN RE
IN SAANSON MAIN BAS JAANA TU
CHAND RE…. CHAND RE
AAJA DIL KI JAMIN PE TU
here raglak side both come to each other and ragini kept her hand on his cheek to feel if he really came, he is really there and cried to realise it’s truth. laksh too cried silently seeing her after a long time. they hugged each other.
ragini- [cried] lak..ss..sh…..you came…where did you go……please never leave me….. lak..s..sh.
laksh- i came naa….i am sorry……i will not leave you all again.
at that time ap came forward crying seeing her son after so long time.
ap- laksh
raglak broke the hug and moved apart and laksh met all the members of the house one by one having emotional talk. ap, sujata and uttara cried hugging him.
sanskar who was looking at swara averted his gaze towards laksh and family members and seeing the reunion he felt a huge weight was lifted from his shoulder. but swara had her eyes fixed only on sanskar. she only wanted him, his embrace.
PAL PAL….PAL PAL
WAQT TOH BITA JAAYE RE
JARA BOL… JARA BOL
WAQT SE KI WOH THAM JAAYE RE
swara started moving towards sanskar who was still standing near his car. sanskar who looked at swara from corner of his eyes saw her coming towards him but did not look at her. she came and stood a feet away from him and then he looked at her and they indulged in an eyelock without saying anything to other.
here ap asked laksh to get inside the house and obliging her they all moved inside. sujata turned to see sanskar and saw swasan standing. sujata was angry on swara for leaving sanskar. she went and interrupted them.
sujata- sanskar…choraa [said slightly shaking him by holding his arm]
sanskar- [coming to sense] haan mom [yes mom]
sujata- sab andar gaye. chal andar [everyone went inside. come let’s go]
sanskar- hmmm…
without paying heed to swara sujata turned and started walking inside and sanskar too moved inside without speaking anything.
AAYI RE… AAYI RE
LE MAIN AAYI HUN TERE LIYE
JAAN RE…. JAAN RE
AAJA TUJHME SAMA JAUN RE
swara felt bad and more tears came out her eyes. she saw him going inside and then saw all have went in. composing herself she also came inside mm.
swara- [in mind] no swara you have to be strong and control yourself. you have come back for sanskar and for your love. you have to correct everything because you yourself messed it up all.
meanwhile ap was not leaving laksh for a second. her happiness knew no bounds. she was quite emotional talking to him.
ap- laksh where did you go leaving your maa. how are you beta and where were you these days.
laksh- maa i am fine and i never meant to leave you maa. how can i leave you all.[ to lighten mood] and maa who leaves there beauties. i can never think of doing such things. my beautiful maa and chachi i never left you and you know what you both are looking horrible with these tears.
ap- [slightly slapping on his cheeks] when will you be serious laksh. i..
laksh- aahhh
ap- [worriedly] what happened beta.
ragini- laksh are you ok.
laksh- [putting hand on his cheek where ap slapped slightly] nothing maa. and ragini i am ok. just bhai gave a nice blow. he is quite powerful. [he said with love, guilt and admiration towards sanskar while rubbing his hand over his cheek to reduce the pain]
ap- [took it in wrong way and angry at sanskar] [worriedly] is it paining beta?
laksh- no maa. just a bit. [he said smilingly]
ap- [angrily] sanskar how can you raise your hands on him? see what you have done.
dp- annapornaa [said to make her quite]
swaraglak and shemish were shocked as ap said like this to sanskar. while maheshwari’s were shocked too but not much because they knew ap was not talking to sanskar and completely ignoring him in these days.
sanskar- [hurt by her tone and question] i am sorry maa. i am sorry laksh [said being hurt trying to control but chocked a little]
sanskar saying this went upstairs before anyone could even react. swalak were the most shocked persons. swara didn’t knew what to do.
laksh- maa [said shockingly] why you spoke like that to bhai.
ap- you were hurt so i….. it was his mistake and it needs to be pointed out. and over that you also left house because of him only naa.
laksh- what??? maa i didn’t left home because of bhai. i left because i was in guilt and i had other reason too. but you shouldn’t have burst out on bhai.
ap- but he hit you.
laksh- and if he didn’t then i wouldn’t have come back…..not atleast now. it’s all because of him that i am standing here.
sujata- jiji mahra chora kabhi bhi galat naa karega laksh ke saath. [jiji my son would never do wrong with laksh. [said sujata in tears]
laksh- i should go and apologise to him. i will just come. [and removing hand of ap holding his hand he climbed the stairs hurriedly.
meanwhile sanskar came in guest room and closed his eyes tightly to suppress his tears because he has vowed not to cry. for two minutes he breathed in silence calming the hurricane in his heart and then moved towards bed and picked a bagpack and came out of room making his way through corridor downwards where laksh met him.
laksh- i am so sorry bhai. because of me maa raised voice on you. i am so sorry.
sanskar- [fake smile] it’s ok laksh.
laksh- please will you forgive me for what i did in past without knowing the truth. i am sorry i did not trust you. please bhai.
sanskar- [closed his eyes for a brief moment and then said] it’s ok. i forgive you. and it’s completely not your fault that you couldn’t trust me. it’s my mistake as well that i could build that trust in you by my wrong doings. so it’s completely ok laksh.
laksh bowed his head down- please i am sorry.
sanskar- i said naa it’s ok laksh.
laksh- i know bhai it’s not easy to forgive. i know i can’t be forgiven completely. but still i hope soon i will gain it and we be like before.
sanskar- hmm….. i have to go laksh… so bye.
laksh- [snapped and looked at tha bagpack in his hand] [shockingly] where are you going?
sanskar- [looked at his bag and laksh’s shocking expression] [smiled faintly] i am going on a buisness trip laksh.
laksh- but….is it because of me.
sanskar- it was pre-planned. infact i had to leave in morning itself but then i got to know about you so….. i have to leave.
laksh nodded understanding and both walked downstairs. as soon as they reached downstairs swara looked at sanskar to know his feelings but his face showed no expressions. she then looked at the bag in his hands shockingly and many thoughts crossed her mind. she remembered that sanskar said that he will not accept her back if she goes out of the house. fear took place in her heart to lose him forever and her heart beat rose unexpectedly. her thoughts got a break with his voice.
sanskar- [to sujata] mom i have to leave. will return in three days.
swara wanted to ask where is he going? is he going leaving her or because of her? her questions got a voice through dp and she was relieved knowing the answer.
dp- where are you going sanskar?
sanskar- bade papa for the sinha’s deal.
dp- ok but today it would have been better if you stayed back.
sanskar- bade papa we have given our words and we can’t back off. i hope you understand.
dp [nodded]- before going i think you both [sanlak] should have a talk with swara and ragini and you all should get together.
sanskar stiffened hearing this. he didn’t know what to do. on one hand his heart yearns for swara but at the same time the past happenings comes in his mind which stops him from moving towards her. his own sufferings and cravings, his unbearable pain doesn’t allow him to think of them back together.
sanskar- bade papa i am getting late. i was supposed to leave in the morning but then i had to bring back laksh. so i think i should leave for now.
swara’s heart twisted at the way sanskar changed the subject so easily clearly indicating that he doesn’t want her back because he didn’t even looked at her once. his expressions. body language indicated that he wants to go from there as soon as possible. she remembered of their meet where he wiped of her vermillion and opened her mangalsutra.
she was terrified. she can’t lose him. she waited for him for as she said, did not come in front of him as he asked her to do so if she loved him, and she did so just for this day to come. she wanted to have a word with sanskar, mend the broken part but nothing came in her mind. she was feeling sanskar’s negligence, his ignorance.
episode ends.
I know today’s episode is almost same to the two to three episodes that I wrote previously but I am writing this as rewritten because previously I messed up the episodes with too much fluctuation and flashback. so now enjoy reading, stay happy and blessed.