SWASAN- Acceptance (10)

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Episode 9

Most awaited moment. Scroll down.

Swara slapped ragini’s hand who tried to adjust her hairs.
” I said no” she warned her. ” I will manage it better” swara snorted.
Ragini smiled at swara’s bossiness.
” he asked you for a date and you didn’t even say me. I am really angry at you” swara said adding extra rose powder to ragini’s cheeks.
It has been only a week ragini arrived but swara and ragini became close. Laksh asked for a date to ragini and she didn’t mention to swara which angered her.
” don’t you think it is too much” ragini asked swara checking herself in mirror. No doubt she is looking absolutely hot, that what swara made. The black dress hugged her body and it ended up above her knees. A simple make up and open hair with loose curls at bottom complimented her look.
” no..laksh said that he falls for charms and you will say me everything what has happened tomorrow morning..everything means everything” With swara’s last warning, they stepped out of the room.
” what is this?” Laksh asked irked by ragini’s dress.
” dress” she fumbled.
” but only half” he snorted ” wear something decent.
Shooting a glare to swara, ragini went upstairs to change. It’s true that he liked girls who are dressy but never wanted that type of girl as his life partner.
Ragini and laksh bid bye to swara and sanskar.
Sanskar turned to swara and leaned ” they will surely enjoy their date. How about the idea of you coming with me” his wishper sent shivers to her. sanskar laughed seeing swara gulp.
” just kidding, actually I mean that why don’t we dine out today? Even ramu kaka is not in the house” he added chuckling. Swara let out a breath and smiled.

Soon they are in his car waiting at a signal for turning it to green. Swara turned to window listening someone’s knock.
A eleven year old boy wearing a torn shirt stood there
” please donate some alms didi. I am hungry”
Swara’s eyes welled up and she turned to sanskar. He noded immediately as if he already knew what she is thinking.
” get inside” she said to him. The boy’s eyes widened and he rejected but hunger made him nod and the trio reached restaurant.
” what do you want to eat?” Swara asked the boy softly reading the menu.
The boy shivered by the looks given by other people in the restaurant. Sanskar placed his palm on boy’s hand and assured him.
” I don’t know any item. Will eat anything to survive”
His words affected swara a lot. Suddenly her eyes turned darker. She gulped and some unwanted memories flashed in her mind.
” I will order for you then” sanskar said with a smile

Thought out the dinner, swara kept quiet and she stared at the boy who is eating curiously.
” sanskar” she called his name in a heart breaking voice once they started their journey to manison.
” hmm” he murmured.
Swara closed her eyes and she leaned back to the seat. Tears rolled down her cheeks.
” many say that love changes a good person to bad but only few know that hunger is then main element ” she sighed and took a deep breath.
” I know how it feels” her voice choked. Sanskar pressed her palm and she gave a faint smile to him. Sanskar parked the car and it started raining. By the time they reached the main door, power went off.
” shit” sanskar muttered under his breath while switching on the lights.
” I think there is a problem with generator. Ramu kaka is also on leave” he ran a hand through his hair.
” it’s okay sanskar. We will mange with candles” she looked him with a bright smile.
Sanskar and swara went to his room. Sanskar removed his shirt which became wet due to rain. Swara lit the candle and walked towards him. Thunders rumbled and the sound is too high. Everything became silent around them. Only their breath and rain touching the ground. Swara looked at sanskar and suddenly her eyes fell on his wound. It pained her thinking about the incident. Everything went blank in her mind and with in a second, she kissed the injured part with tears on her eyes.
Sanskar stepped back with shock in his eyes. She then realised what she did and moved back.
” I..I ..just” she fumbled and dropped candle. Darkness filled the room. Swara stammered and cursed herself for her act
” swara” called her name. She stopped stepping out of the room and turned her head to sanskar.
” I need to talk to you” he stated in a deep voice.

Swara took a long breath because she knew what he wanted to know and today she will surely open up. She walked to sanskar and crossed her arms.
” I think we are not in friendship anymore swara and I don’t want that to happen” he said his eyes closed.
” why?”
He sighed and closed his tightly. Swara took a deep breath. Tears rolled down her cheeks.
” I want to share my life with you sanskar. I..I..love you”
With in a second, she is pinned to wall. Sanskar held her arms tightly and their faces are few inches away. Swara looked into sanskar’s eyes with love. But his eyes are red, with pain, with anger for which swara didn’t had a explanation.
” love is a strong emotion swara. You can’t deal it”.
” why dont you admit it sanskar?” She said in a silent and heavy voice.
Lightening struck, they were able to see each other for a moment.
” admit that you love me” she raised her hand to his cheeks and rested it just below his eyes. ” i can see it in your eyes” He took a deep breath and removed her hand from his face.
She understood that this man is not going to accept at any cost so there is only one way left for her. She released herself from his grip and looked straight into his eyes
” you are afraid sanskar, you are afraid to admit your feelings because you always wear a mask infront of world to show that you are a ruthless business man and that image may spoil if you love.” She shouted at him with anger.
” you show off as a strong man but you are coward” she added.
Any man cannot bear being called coward and it increased his anger. He caught hold of her arm and pulled her to him.
” I am a coward” he admitted. Swara’s eyes widened. “I am coward and mask my feelings but not too show off ” he said in a firm voice and sighed.
“I am afraid because when I love, I love until it hurts, and I want to be loved back with the same passion. I’m afraid of loving yes. It is because if someone ever tries to hurt, even a little, to what I love…I raise hell, will do anything to destroy them regardless what happens to me. I lose all my senses in love. You can’t handle me swara.”
He left her and turned facing his back. Once again lightening struck. Swara kept staring his back with teary eyes. The intensity in his words, the truthfulness in his eyes, the pain in his voice enlightened her senses. This is what she always wished for. To be loved madly by someone, to become an important part of someone. She covered the distance between them by hugging him from back. His heart stopped beating for a second and he stilled.
” If this is what for you are afraid, then I am ready sanskar” she said in deep voice. Tears soaked his shirt. Heavy tons of silence engulfed them.
” I have never got what I wished for in my life. I have never been so important for anyone except my parents ” she closed her eyes tightly still crying ” if this is love, if it is that intense then I want to feel it, Please ” she begged him.
He fisted his hands and parted himself from her.
” I am sorry swara. I am afraid to love”
It hurted her because everyone rejected her in her life. But this time she is not going to take any back step when she understood that noone can love her madly like him.
She wiped her tears and walked to the entrance but turned back.
” okay sanskar. You said you version But that cannot stop me loving you, stop being a part of you. I love you and that’s final.” Saying that, she left the room.

Sanskar took a deep breath. He is true, true that he is afraid of loving because whenever he loves someone, they either hurt him or move far away. It’s the reason he stays closed only with laksh but this girl has again broke the walls that he constructed around his heart. Some people commit same mistake of trusting and loving other person even after getting hurt by some other. The same is the case with him but this time, his love didn’t go wrong for her. He wanted her badly and it took time for him to realise. He raised his head but swara already left. He ran outside the room and switched on flash from his mobile. He searched for her in her room, corridor, hall and kitchen. He came out and realised that it is not raining anymore. He saw swara standing in middle of the garden staring at dark, cloudy sky. Swara turned back when she felt a hand on her shoulder.
He looked straight into her eyes and at that moment, he saw hurt and love in them. He quickly embraced her.
” I am sorry” he murmured in her hair. Swara is shocked by his gesture but wrapped her arms around his torso.
” I..I.love you swara” he finally confessed. Swara pulled back from the hug and looked him with shock. He smiled and again embraced her. Swara melt in his arms and they stood for a long time enjoying each other’s company.
Suddenly a rain drop fell on swara’s fingers.
” I think we should go inside” she informed after parting herself from him. When she didnt get any answer, she lifted her lashes to met his already staring eyes. They are so intense and held truthfulness in them.
He moved his palms over her face and rested them on her cheeks.
” never leave me, please ” he pleaded her in pain.
She smiled and hugged him again.

Swara bid bye to sanskar who came to drop her to her room. She closed the door and sat on the bed. She then opened the drawer of the tablelamp and took a photo. Her eyes welled up seeing her parents in it. She sobbed for a good amount of time and then her thoughts shifted to sanskar. She smiled brightly and placed the photo back to its place. She sighed before closing her eyes welcoming sweet dreams.