SWASAN FF I Hate u & I Hate Myself Because I Still Love U Episode 33

Sanskars POV

It’s been the two days since that incident. Uttara is still in icu, her her health is improving. All are staying in the farm house where raj uncle & urvashi mami used to stay when they come here. But swara opted to stay with her friends as the college & hostel are sealed by the department. Everyone insisted her to stay with them but she denied. Don’t know what’s going on in her mind. While coming to hospital I felt like I was hurt and it’s paining her more than me. But after my surgery i didn’t get a glimpse of her. Even though arjun informed me that she is busy with the formalities of the case but my mind is not ready to accept it. I mean from the time i came to consciousness I’m desperately searching for her. Whenever the door opens i hope it to be her. But she……… not even once she thought of paying a visit. What happened Swara still u didn’t forgive me. May be she hates me. I blamed her for the thing which even never happened. If i was in her place may be me too will have done the same.

Vishesh entered the room breaking his thoughts.

Vishesh: hello sir how r u?

Sanskar: sanskar… u can call me sanskar

Visheshs smiles a little

Sanskar : why r u smiling

Visesh : when the doctor called swara as ma’am she too tell the same (mocking) SWARA… U CAN CALL ME SWARA. U both r exactly same

A smile crept on sanky’s face hearing swara.

Vishesh: can i ask u some thing sanskar, i know i’m a complete outsider and i just know swara only from last few months but see u both …… u know …. Out of curiosity

Sanskar: just split it yaar

Vishesh: we r friends from the very first day she came here. From then happy ho ya sad we shared everything …. We means our gang. Whatever the situation may be we didn’t see a teardrop in her eye. She was always the same. First we thought the she is still in the trauma of the death of her parents.

Sanskar : what …..???????????

Vishesh : i mean aashi’s parents were dead right soo

Sanskar: ohhhh

Vishesh: the first time i saw tears in her eyes was when that urvashi attacked u. She was crying like hell seeing u unconscious. And here in hospital also. I saw her panicked when the nurse asked her to arrange for blood, and her relief after knowing that my blood group is same.

Sanskar was having smile on his face while vashesh saying all these

Vishesh: i could see that love for u in her each and every movements. And now after seeing the smile on ur face i could conclude that u too love her. Then what happened between you both that she is not ready to face u. Today she send me to check on u yesterday kaira. Whats going on between you two. I mean……. If you feel comfortable then and i guess i can help you.

Sanskar :she always loved me unconditionally. But i was an idiot i give more importance to my family than her. For her i was her world and for me she came after my family. You know vishesh we know each other for childhood even after knowing her that much i doubt her. I being a police officer didn’t even try to find the truth. Simply believed what was shown to me.(Sanskar tells everything which happened in there wedding, her fake death, and everything happened after that till now to vishesh) But still she loves me i don’t deserve her vishesh. But i can’t even lose her also. I want her in my life i want to make her feel how special she is to me. Whatever punishment she gives me i’m ready to accept it, i even don’t want her to forgive me bcz i know i don’t deserve it, she can hate me can be rude with me but …. but i need her by my side i want her in front of my eyes always. Without her it’s killing me vishesh.

Sanskar was crying saying all these.

Vishesh : sanskar do you think she can punish you so severely. Even if she does na it will pain her more than you. Just give her some time i guess everything will be sorted out.

Sanskar : me too guess so. If she not come back i don’t know what is going to happen

Vishesh : sanskar what happened is everything ok ?????

Sanskar : no vishesh nothing is ok without swara. Everyone wants to ask sorry from her. Yesterday Mom & Ma were here full time waiting for her. They were not ready leave from here but at night ma had a slight chest pain so Adi strictly forbid her from coming here. Shekar uncle had locked himself in a room. He not even wants to hear anyone. Bhabhi’s contition is the most worst thing. She was already in guilt that she doubt her daughter like sister and over that bhai is not talking to her, not only to her but to me also. He is right in his place. Bhabhi is leading a lifeless life since her fake death. And swara she is not at all giving a chance to anyone to speak to her.

Laksh who was coming there hearing all these: did you give a chance to her at the day of your wedding. If you had allowed her to speak her that day then i myself would have taken your side. When you didn’t allow her to speak then why are you expecting her to give a chance to you.

Sanskar: you are right bhai i’m the culprit, punish me but plz forgive bhabhi she is not at fault she was brainwashed by urvashi mami. Plz bhai i can’t see her like this.

Laksh: sanskar i have already told you i don’t want to talk about it till swara forgives her. Arnav have arranged for your & uttu’s discharge so get ready we are leaving by evening.

Vishesh: ok guy then i’m leaving, take care sanskar

Sanskar: bye….

Vishesh went out of the room and looked at his phone the display showed swara on call…….

He cancelled the call and went from there

Here swara was crying miserably after hearing everything. After some time she get ready and went out.

In farm house

Everyone was getting ready to go back when they hear a knock on the door. Sharmista was about to open the door

Ragini: ma you try to get baba out of the room, I will see who is over there.

Sharmista: ok beta

Ragini goes and opens the door and get stunned by seeing Swara

Ragini: Swara…….

Ragini was about to call others but

Swara: I want to meet my hero…….i mean Mr. Laksh Maheshwary

Laksh: who’s tha…….Kiddu why are you standing there come inside

He was about to drag her inside but she hesitate. He was confused

Laksh: Kiddu you came here and now why are you not coming inside???

Swara: voh…. Can we sit in the garden. I just want to talk to you alone. So plz

Ragini had tears in her eyes after hearing this. Laksh took Swara to the garden

Laksh: Kiddu tell me what happened

Swara was about to tell him just then adi & pankhuri came there.

Adi/pankhuri : Swara…

She saw them and hugged them

Pankhuri: Swara why are you sitting here come na come inside

Swara: leave it bhabhi I just come to confront my this idiot hero.

Laksh: you called me idiot ….. Kiddu this is not fair here i’m fighting with everyone for you and you are calling me idiot

Swara: exactly…… why the hell are you fighting with everyone for me look hero they all did wrong with me so it’s my right to punish them. I thought you to me a little more mature.

Adi and pankhuri chuckled and laksh pouted

Swara: just think hero di left his world for you when you were in coma. Even the doctors who treated you was not sure about your recovery but it doesn’t mattered her. She leaved her family, me, her dream sab kuch just to took care of you. But what she get in return, your hatred. No hero what you did with her is wrong and i won’t forgive you for making my di sad. She did all that thinking that i tried to kill you she was angry on me for you. She loves you like anything and everything. Plz forgive her, i know you were concerned for me but now i’m ok and you should concentrate on your wif….no no your would be wife

laksh/ adi/ pankhuri: what?????? Would be…….

Swara: what… what….. if you guys are forgetting let me remind you di just eloped with this stupid and took care of him bus. These both didn’t get married. So bhai you just take di with you to GM and then fix a date for their marriage and get them married with all the rituals….. Wait i guess by then uttara will also be fine soooo we can have uttu & sahil and hero & di’s marriage in the same mandap. What say?????????

laksh/ adi/ pankhuri: then what abt you and sanky

Swara became silent. She was trying hard to hide her tears for them.

Adi : see swara if you can forgive ragini then why not sanky he too is repenting na

Swara: who told you i forgive di? I won’t forgive her so easily and the same goes with sanskar i was just telling hero not to spoil his life for me

Laksh: yeah i can see that clearly in your eyes that you are concerned for rather than your di

Pankhuri: swara plz just forget what ever happened. You don’t have any idea what happened after your that fake death. Mom suffered from a hear…..

Swara: i know everything bhabhi. I already forgive everyone in my mind but … it’s just i … i am not able to forget anything, that dreadful day which made my life upside down. Plz bhabhi i need time

Laksh : kiddo you take your own time but just remember one thing by passing each and every second you’re punishing yourself along with them.

Swara bid bye to the trio and was about to leave when all the family members surrounded her except ragini. She tried to avoid them but AP hold her hands.

AP: beta plz all these is happening just because of me. It was my stupidity that i came in urvashi’s words and made sanskar do all that. Swara he was not ready to do that but i compelled him and urvashi blackmailed him emotionally saying abt my heart disease. Otherwise he wouldn’t have done that in his wildest dreams. I’m sorry beta you please punish me and please spare others. (she folds her hands in front of her crying hard)

Swara: it’s ok aunty i can understand you chose your own son and daughter insted of me. And you are right at your place as your a perfect mother i’m not angry on you and why should i be i can’t expect the trust from others which my own family and my love didn’t had on me, so it’s perfectly fine. Bye aunty i have some work in my office

Saying this she left leaving a speechless shekar and sharmista behind

In hospital

Sanskar and uttara are discharged. Adi, laksh, and ragini came to pick them. Sanskar was surprised to see the happy face of ragini. When enquired she told him about laksh’s changed behaviour towards her.

Sanskar: bhabhi but who did this happen? I mean he was soo angry with us bpth but now he is talking to me normally…….. It’s not less than a miracle

Ragini: yeah sanskar and this happened only because of swara

Sanskar : swara?????????????

Ragini: han swara.. She had came to farmhouse to meet laksh. I don’t know what she told him but there was a notable change in laksh’s behaviour after that.

Sanskar: now i seriously feel that i really don’t deserve her

Ragini: me too sanskar we really don’t deserve her forgiveness. We accused her soo brutally but she…… she is thinking about our happiness. We are really bad sanskar really very very bad

Sanskar: han bhabhi i feel ashamed of myself. I told her that i will punish her with my hatred but i guess it’s my turn to be punished with her hatred

Just then sahil entered

Sahil: di, sanskar it’s time to leave, chalen

(in these days sahil took care of uttara as he is a doctor)

Sanskar (holding sahil’s hands): how could you forgive us so easily sahil?????????

Sahil: sanskar i know what you did is only worth for my hatred but you know what if i would have been in your place and swara in uttara’s then me too have done the same. So why should i be angry on you and more over if i will be angry on you then shona will not leave me. You know she loves you both a lot so was she hurt that much, she is a little angry on you but don’t worry every thing will be alright. We all are there with you man. And now Karan is also there with us you know she never denies karan for anything as he is soo sensitive.

Sanskar: thank you sahil. I want to apologise to him too as i hurt him also.

Sahil: it’s ok sanky he will understand

They leave from hospital. DP had arranged a private jet for all but swara refused to travel with them so Adi & Pankhuri stay with her. Later swara finished her official works and the trio also leave to kolkata.

Precap: last part may be

Please suggest me some punishments to sanskar and what do you want should swara forget every thing and move on or should she live all alone. Give me your suggetions that i can finish it perfectly please please pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeease