Swasan – SHE’S NOT FOR ME CHAPTER 15

SWASAN – SHE’S NOT FOR ME
Heyy, It’s Anjali back with the next chapter!!!
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All Parts here

CHAPTER 14 LINK :
Chapter 14

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Swara’s convo with her family

CHAPTER 15
It wasn’t that he enjoyed feeling like an ass, Sanskaar re­flected as he swirled a glass of brandy at his club, but it seemed that lately, around Swara at least, he couldn’t quite avoid acting like one. There she had been at her mother’s birthday party, so damned happy for him, so delighted that he had uttered the word love in her presence, and he had simply snapped.
Because he knew how her mind worked, and he knew that she was already thinking madly ahead, trying to se­lect the perfect woman for him, and the truth was…
Well, the truth was just too pathetic for words.
But he’d apologized, and although he could swear up that he wasn’t going to behave like an idiot again, he would probably find himself apologizing again sometime in the future, and she would most likely just chalk it all up to a cranky nature on his part, never mind that he’d been a model of good humour when Laksh had been alive.
He downed his brandy and ordered another. He checked the time and found that it was just past noon. Goddamn it. He never indulged himself to drinks before evening and here he was….
God, he was pathetic.
Well, he’d be done with this nonsense soon. She’d find someone, marry the lucky guy, and move out of the house. They would remain friends, of course— Swara wasn’t the sort to allow otherwise—but he wouldn’t see her every day over the breakfast table. He wouldn’t even see her as often as he had before Laksh’s death. Her new hus­band would not permit her to spend so much time in his company, despite the fact that he was her late husband’s brother.
Sanskaar heard someone call his name and he turned to see who it was.
Sanskaar (without any enthusiasm) : Vinay Pathak! Long time!
Good manners made Sanskaar gesture to the seat next to him and he turned to chat with his college acquaintance.
Vinay (gaily) : It’s been too long, in fact. Hear you’re in charge now? The empire under your feet heh? Rich man.
He laughed amused, but Sanskaar gritted his teeth and kept quiet. The pair exchanged the most basic of pleasantries until Vinay got to the point.

Vinay : I hear that you’re widowed sister-in-law is looking for a husband?
Sanskaar felt as if he’d been punched. Never mind the atrocious floral display in his drawing room; it still sounded rather distasteful coming from someone’s lips.
Someone young, reasonably handsome, and obviously in the market for a wife.
Sanskaar : Um.. I think she is.
Vinay looked so gleeful that Sanskaar wanted to punch out the smile from his face.
Sanskaar (peeved) : I don’t think she’ll choose just anyone though.
It seemed to have fall upon deaf ears.
Vinay : I know it’s not the trend this day and all, but does she come with a dowry?
Sanskaar’s ears grew hot, always a warning sign.
Sanskaar : Excuse me?
Vinay (who clearly didn’t understand Sanskaar’s mood) : It’s just that… She IS a widow. And she’s a Maheshwari still. You really think you can get rid of her just like that? She’ll be a pain in your ass unless you offer some incentive to the men.
Sanskaar nearly shot out of his seat but he was interrupted by another young man, Parth Sinha.
Parth : Mr Maheshwari!

Sanskaar turned to him and recognised the man. He was about a year younger than himself. One of the flower bouquets had been from this Parth, Sanskaar recalled darkly.
Sanskaar : Mr Sinha! A pleasure. I believe you know Mr Vinay Pathak?
Parth (nodding) : I do. Good afternoon, Mr Pathak. Mr Maheshwari…
Sanskaar (wearily) : Please, Sanskaar will be fine.
Parth : Alright then, Sanskaar! I wanted to ask you about Mrs Swara Maheshwari’s…
Vinay : Ah! That’s exactly what I wanted to talk about. So Sanskaar, Did you hear what I just said?
Sanskaar (his weariness all gone now, guardedly) : Yes?
Vinay : I was talking to Kartik Tiwari and we thought of asking you about this. I mean, she’s been in mourning for what? 2 years?
Sanskaar : 4 years.
Vinay : She has an impeachable reputation and probably would be an excellent wife…
Sanskaar (thinking) : Good God! Finish the sentence.
Parth : Mrs Maheshwari would be an excellent wife to anyone.
Vinay (nodding) : Exactly.. But it’s not like she’s new or something. I mean, She knows… Which is why we think we need incentive to consider her.
Sanskaar couldn’t stand it any longer.

Sanskaar : Vinay! Get to the blo*dy damn point. What do you mean? What does Swara know?
Vinay : I just mean… She’s not untouched. You’re going to get someone who knows exactly what to do in bed. Though that may be appealing, it throws me off a little.
Sanskaar froze. He stood and towered over the man.
Sanskaar (quietly) : What did you just tell?
Vinay : I just..
Parth (alarmed) : Don’t repeat it, man!
Vinay : But everyone’s saying it.
Sanskaar (in that same voice) : Not in front of me. Not unless they want a few broke teeth.
Vinay : It’s the truth though. She’s not pure.
Sanskaar lunged.
Vinay fell off his chair.
Vinay : What the hell? What did I even tell?
Sanskaar wasn’t certain how his hands had come to be around Vinay’s neck, but he realized he rather liked them there.
Sanskaar (hissing) : You will NEVER utter her name again. Do you understand me?
Vinay nodded frantically, but the motion cut off his air even further, and his cheeks began to purple. Sanskaar let go and stood up, wiping his hands against each other as if attempting to rub away something foul.
Sanskaar : I will not let Mrs Maheshwari be spoken of in such disrespectful terms. Next time, anyone calls her impure or anything similar to that, they answer directly to me. Do you understand? There will be no mention of incentives or dowry or anything remotely disrespectful about her.
Vinay nodded. And so did a number of the on­lookers.
Sanskaar (nodding once) : Good.

He decided to get out this place. He couldn’t go home because Swara would be there, but maybe he could go to the office. He took his coat and began walking to the exit when he heard his name being uttered yet again.
He turned around, wondering what man was idiot enough to pester him in such a state.
Sahil Gadodia. Swara’s brother. Damn.
Sahil smiled and gestured towards a private table.
Sahil : Shall we?
Sanskaar didn’t protest but he wasn’t ready for this. Sahil Gadodia had always unnerved him. Before marrying his beautiful wife Aparna, Sahil and Sanskaar carried the same, devilish charm and reputation. Even now Sanskaar was convinced that if anyone guessed his feelings, it would be Sahil.
Resolving to leave in 5 minutes, Sanskaar sat down. Sahil ordered a gin and then turned to Sanskaar.
Sahil : Pleasant day, isn’t it? Not too hot nor cold. Well, Except for Vinay Pathak today. He’s an ass.
Sanskaar gave him a terse nod, trying not to notice that Swara’s brother was watching him as he always did, his shrewd gaze carefully overlaid with an air of charm­ing innocence. Sahil cocked his head slightly to the side, rather as if, Sanskaar thought acerbically, he were angling for a better look into his soul.
Sanskaar (muttering under his breath) : blo*dy hell!
Sahil : Pardon?
Sanskaar signalled for the waiter, then turned to face Sahil.
Sanskaar : Do you want another gin?
Sahil (amiably) : Sure.
Sanskaar ordered a gin and a martini.
Sahil : Any plans right now?
Sanskaar : None.
Sahil : Me too.
Damn. Again. Was it really too much to wish for one blo*dy hour of solitude?
Sahil (his tone quiet) : Thank you for defending my sister’s honour.
Sanskaar’s first impulse was to growl that he didn’t need to be thanked; it was his place as well as any Gadodia’s to defend Swara’s honor, but Sahil’s eyes seemed uncommonly sharp that evening, so he just nodded instead.
Sanskaar : I can’t let anyone speak of her in such terms.
Their drinks arrived. Sanskaar fought the urge to down his in one gulp, but he did take a large enough sip for it to burn down his throat. Sahil, on the other hand, let out an appreciative sigh and sat back.
Sahil : I really love this club. Best gin ever. You just don’t stuff like this in Mumbai.
Sanskaar grunted. It was all that seemed necessary. Sahil took another drink, clearly savoring the brew.
Sahil : It’s not nearly as good as my wife, but then who or what is?
Sanskaar saw Sahil’s face glow at the mention of Aparna Gadodia and grunted once more. Feeling wretched, he raised his glass to his lips.
Sahil : You should just marry her.
Sanskaar nearly choked.
Sanskaar : I’m sorry?
Sahil : Marry her. It’s simple enough.

It was probably too much to hope that Sahil was speak­ing of anyone but Swara, but Sanskaar took one des­perate stab, anyway, and spoke in quite the chilliest tone he could muster.
Sanskaar : Who am I supposed to marry?
Sahil (sighing) : Do we really have to do this?
Sanskaar (spluttering) : I can’t marry Swara.
Sahil : Why not?
Sanskaar started to answer, then cut himself off. Because there were a hundred reasons he couldn’t marry her, none of which he could speak aloud.
Sanskaar : She was married to Laksh.. My cousin.
Sahil : That doesn’t matter. Pari bhabhi was our cousin too. There’s nothing illegal about it.
No, but there was everything immoral. He’d wanted Swara for so long, loved her for what felt like an eternity—even when Laksh had been living. He had de­ceived his cousin in the basest way possible; he would not compound the betrayal by stealing his wife.
It would complete the ugly circle that had led to his be­ing the owner of the Maheshwari Empire, a title that was never supposed to have been his. None of it was supposed to be his. Swara was the only thing left of Laksh’s that he hadn’t made his own.
Laksh’s death had given him fabulous wealth. It had given him power, prestige, and the title of CEO.

If it gave him Swara as well, how could he possibly hang onto the thread of hope that he hadn’t somehow, even if only in his dreams, wished for this to happen?
How could he live with himself then?
Sahil : She wants to marry.
Sanskaar looked up, aware that he’d been silent with his thoughts for some time. And that Sahil had been watch­ing him closely all the while. He shrugged, trying to maintain a cavalier demeanour, even though he suspected it wouldn’t fool the man across the table.
Sanskaar : She’ll do what she wants.
Sahil : She really wants kids, Sanskaar. I don’t want her to choose hastily. She might choose someone who’s cruel to her.
Sanskaar (doubtfully) : Swara?
Maybe some other woman would be that foolish, but not his Swara.
Sahil : It could happen.
Sanskaar : Then she leaves him and comes back to me.. I mean us.
Sanskaar hoped Sahil didn’t notice, but ofcourse that dratted man did. His eyebrow rose but he left that aside.
Sahil : Ofcourse, She could come back to us. Adarsh and I won’t have our little sister suffer. But this conversation is moot, isn’t it?
There was something strange in Sahil’s tone, some­thing hidden and provoking. Sanskaar looked up sharply, unable to resist the impulse to search the other man’s face for clues to his agenda.
Sanskaar : Why is that?
Sahil took another sip of his drink. Sanskaar noticed that the volume of liquid in the glass never seemed to go down.
Sahil toyed with his glass for several moments before looking up, his gaze settling on Sanskaar’s face. To any­one else, it might have seemed a bland expression, but there was something in Sahil’s eyes that made Sanskaar want to squirm in his seat. They were sharp and piercing, and although different in color, shaped precisely like Swara’s.
Sahil : Why is the point moot? Because you don’t want to marry Swara. Isn’t that right?
Sanskaar opened his mouth for a quick retort, then slammed it shut when he realized—with more than con­siderable shock—that he’d been about to say “Of course I do”.
And he did.
He wanted to marry her.
He just didn’t think he could live with his conscience if he did.

Sahil : What’s the matter?
Sanskaar : Nothing. Why?
Sahil : I don’t…. I mean it looked like you had just realised something.
Good Lord, one more moment with Sahil Gadodia, and the blo*dy man would have all of Sanskaar’s se­crets laid open and bare. Sanskaar pushed his chair back.
Sanskaar : I need to get going now.
Sahil : Ofcourse.
Sanskaar snorted. They could have been talking about the weather from Sahil’s tone. Sanskaar stood, then gave a curt nod. It wasn’t a terribly warm farewell, considering that they were relations of a sort, but it was the best he could do under the circum­stances.
Sahil : No one will be against this match. Just take time and think about what I said.
Sanskaar let out a harsh laugh as he pushed through the door and into the hall. As if he’d be able to think about anything else.
For the rest of his life.
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PRECAP : More doubts
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I know I’ve sweared a lot in this chapter, but my poor Sanskaar! How decent can he act 😛 😛
Kids… Don’t get influenced by the words 😛 😛
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Hope you like this chappie 🙂 🙂
Will reply to all ur comments in mmai and snfm previous chapter from tomorrow <3 <3
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