Chapter 18:
Swara is confused about her feelings.
Swara: do I have started loving him? (thinks of all her moments with sanskar) Yes! (smiles and touches her face) what? Am I serious? How could this happen? No (gets tensed) I was afraid that it will happen and it happened. (runs inside and goes to her room and cries bitterly. She stands in front of mirror) you are so stupid Swara! (picks up vase and breaks the mirror) that blo*dy creep! I will not leave him. He made me fall for him. I will set his brains right! (keeps hand on her head) oh no! (after sometime, she gets the mirror changed and cleans the room. She is thinking about Sanskar) he is your husband Swara and there is nothing wrong to fall in love with your own husband. Yes! I will inform him. (runs inside and bangs the door) Oh God! What should I do to make him realize that I love him. (thinks and gets an idea) yeah! I will wear the dress and jewellery which he gifted me first time to express his love. He will surely understand my feelings. But where did I keep it? (hits her head) Swara! You should say where did you threw it? silly girl! Why didn’t you accept his love earlier? At least, he would not have gone through this much pain. (checks the drawer but does not find it. She tries to open another drawer but it is locked.) keys are with Sanskar. Yeah! But he kept it in his locker. What could be the password? Maybe his mom and dad! (tries but fails) oh God! It is the last chance. Think Swara think! Whose name he kept in password? Yeah! Me. (writes her name and it opens. She is hell shocked) what? (takes keys and opens the drawer with teary eyes. She does not find dress but takes some papers out. These are the same papers on which he wrote with blood. She reads it.) Dream girl! I love you. (another paper) please accept me (another paper) I don’t know your name but I love you to death? (holds her head and sits down. She cries bitterly) Oh my God! (Flashback: he is running behind her and she is irritated. She pushes him.
Sanskar: listen! I don’t know you but we can sit and talk. You can tell me about yourself.
Swara: why? Who are you to me? Get lost.
Sanskar: I love you.
Swara: I don’t love you. Now leave my way. (tries to go but he stops her)
Sanskar: I can do anything for you.
Swara: you flirt! I know this all is your drama. You can’t take one drop of blood from your body and say that you can do anything. (looks away)
Sanskar: one drop! I can give my life for you.
Swara: then go and write with your blood that you love me. Maybe I feel some pity on you but I can’t love you at least in this life.
Sanskar: (determined face) love don’t need proofs and I would write with my blood but not to prove anything. (goes) flashback ends)
Swara: (tears roll down her cheeks) you were right Sanskar. Love don’t need any proofs. I was wrong Sanskar! I was wrong. You wrote all this with your blood. I feel very lucky that you love me to this extent. (gets up and locks the drawer. She goes in dressing room and searches it. She finds her paintings.) oh my God! He is a painter. He painted my face. Wow! She keeps one painting in her luggage. She goes and searches in cupboard. She finds the dress but it’s shawl get entangled with other clothes. She removes the clothes and sees her pictures all over the cupboard. She again starts crying) Sanskar! Why do you love me so much? (flashback: Swara: why do you love me so much Sanskar? What is in me?
Sanskar: because we don’t any reason to love someone. I love everything related to you no matter what do you think of me. Flashback ends) she gets up and decides to convey her feelings. At night, she is wearing that dress. She talks to herself.
Swara: (stands in front of mirror) Sanskar! You are very stubborn. You made me fall in love with you freak! I love you. no Swara! This looks like you are starting world war three. (practices and gets irked) ah! No ways, it is not my cup of tea. He would have to understand by my gestures. Yeah! (sits on bed and waits for him. AP enters the room and she stands up happily thinking her as Sanskar) Sanskar I… (turns and is shocked to see AP) Mom, you…
AP: (smiles) waiting for Sanskar?
Swara: (looks down) yeah!
AP: you are looking beautiful in this dress. God bless you. Keep my son happy like this forever.
Swara: (nods in yes and she goes out) Swara! Have patience. He will come in some time. (again stands in front of mirror and recalls moments with Sanskar.
(Flashback: Sanskar is sitting on bed when she comes. They are in Paris. Swara gets angry.
Swara: hey you Rascal! This is my room and this bed is mine. Get lost else I will drag you to floor.
Sanskar: (smiles) calm down! You always say this so I wanted to do an experiment. You were saying that you will drag me to floor. So accomplish your mission. So tell me darling! From where would you hold me to drag. My arms or legs. (keeps his feet near Swara.)
Swara: (angrily) shut up and don’t you dare to come in my room now onwards else I will break your legs.
Sanskar: you will look very cute while dragging me on floor. I will love to see.
Swara: opportunistic! (throws blanket on him and sleeps on couch. Flashback ends. Swara laughs and thinks she was so silly. She sits on bed. He comes in the room and sees her. She stands in front of him and he gets mesmerized by her beauty. She smiles and walks to him)
Sanskar: beautiful! (comes to senses) why are you wearing this dress?
Swara: I don’t need any reason to wear this dress. I thought that you first time gifted this so I should wear this for you but now I think that I should not wear all this. (turns to go but he stops her) now what?
Sanskar: you are very short tempered Swara! Look at me how calm and cool I am. I meant that you never wore this dress so why tonight? Is there something special?
Swara: special? (thinks to tell him) Actually, I want to tell you that I …
Sanskar: don’t hesitate. Tell me clearly.
Swara: shut up and listen to me. Else I will break your mouth.
Sanskar: it seems that you are not sleepy. Ah! (smiles at her) now I get it. I know why are you doing all this?
Swara: (to herself) wow! What a brilliant mind. (to Sanskar) wow! You know it? then I don’t need to say it. (hugs him) I am very happy that you got my point without speaking.
Sanskar: come fast, else all the restaurants would be closed. I know you want to have dinner outside.
Swara: (irritated) what? You… (controls her temper and tries to fake a smile) how do you know that I want to go out?
Sanskar: because you are full ready, I mean this jewellery, hair style and this dress. You are not a fool that you will wear this and wait for me so that you can express your love to me. Right?
Swara: shut up! (shouts) you blo*dy dog! Use your brains!
Sanskar: (laughing) see, I was right. We are just good friends and you want to enjoy your dinner with your chatterbox. (side hugs her) oh come on, don’t spoil your mood. Come! (drags her outside and she unwillingly sits in car.)
Swara: (thinks) he always that he does not need words to understand me, then why he does not understand that I love him. I feel like I will explode. I will kill him. (looks angrily at him) I will tell him tomorrow. (Sanskar looks at her)
Sanskar: what?
Swara: what what?
Sanskar: (laughs) what what what? (swara glares at him angrily) you want to say something?
Swara: no, not at all.
Sanskar: oh come on, I know you are angry on me because I said that you were waiting for me because you love me. I was kidding yar! I know that you don’t love me.
Swara: (thinks) this idiot! (to Sanskar) can’t you stop blabbering all this rubbish?
Sanskar: (serious face) I am sorry!
Swara: no, actually I am sorry!
Sanskar: in this, we reached my favourite restaurant. Look! (she gets down the car and they both get inside. They sit on the table.) do you remember something?
Swara: (tries to recall) yeah! It is the same restaurant where you first time told me that you love me. I am sorry for that rudeness.
Sanskar: no, I thought of silly things.
Swara: no no, in fact I am very lucky. If you had not met me, how would I have found a very good friend in you. Even I and Ragini don’t share this bond that we both share. My family have not given me this much love which you gave. (smiles) thank you!
Sanskar: I should thank you for bringing colours to my life.
Swara: In these few days, you have become very special to me. (waiter comes and serves food. They eat silently and go back home. She sits on bed near Sanskar)
Sanskar: hey! What do you want to say? (brings her closer to him) you say that I am very special to you. Tell me what thing is bothering you? we are good friends, right? There should be no secret between us.
Swara: (thinks) how to tell him. No, I will tell him tomorrow. Yeah (lowers her eyes) can we talk tomorrow? I am feeling sleepy. (lays on other side and closes her eyes. Tears of happiness flow from her closed eyes and all this is noticed by Sanskar. He gets restless and disappointed.)
Sanskar: why is she crying? Is she not happy here? Did I do anything wrong? I have seen in her eyes, she wanted to tell me but what? I will ask her tomorrow. Good night my princess! (next day, he does not find her in room. He goes down and sees her preparing the breakfast.) hey! You don’t need to do all this. Come!
Swara: (smiles) only for you. just one minute. Go and sit there, I will come. (she brings his breakfast and serves him. Both eat and he goes to get ready for office. She comes behind him holding his coat and tie. He sees her in mirror and smiles.)
So guys how was it? hope you all like it.